-echo`s Other-poll

joannalove06 (338.1 days ago)
hey with me I found out that its just easyer to have two. I hate people at my shower that didn`t like the other. I felt horribale with them commenting on what ugly things and cheap things the other side brought. Or even worst when they stand up and say I BOUGHT ONE OF THOSE SHE DON`T NEED IT.. Just do them apart.. Just make sure your not giving out the cash for the showers.

Mrs.Marcucci (351.6 days ago)
I HAD THE SAME PROBLEM MY MOM AND MOTHER IN LAW ACTUALLY DONT GET ALONG BUT FAMILY IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ME AND THEY NEVER SEE EACH OTHER, I TOLD BOTH OF THEM I WANTED MY BABY SHOWER TO BE WITH BOTH FAMILIES TOGETHER, I TOLD BOTH OF THEM THAT IF I GET THERE AND THERE IS ONLY ONE SIDE OF THE FAMILY I WOULD TURN AROUND AND LEAVE, IT WORKED!!

Mrs.Marcucci (351.6 days ago)
I HAD THE SAME PROBLEM MY MOM AND MOTHER IN LAW ACTUALLY DONT GET ALONG BUT FAMILY IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ME AND THEY NEVER SEE EACH OTHER, I TOLD BOTH OF THEM I WANTED MY BABY SHOWER TO BE WITH BOTH FAMILIES TOGETHER, I TOLD BOTH OF THEM THAT IF I GET THERE AND THERE IS ONLY ONE SIDE OF THE FAMILY I WOULD TURN AROUND AND LEAVE, IT WORKED!!

summerisis (353 days ago)
I`d like to add that sometimes family`s might be combining but that doesn`t mean that they need to do have joint parties. In my case -- I am not comfortable with our two families together as they are very different types of people and it causes stress to me. For the most part, this is understood and respected. Maybe your MIL and your inlaws would be more comfortable in a setting associated with their family and not both families. It`s not necessarily a `snub` for just a comfort issue. Obviously, I don`t know your situation but I do know that you should not be put in the position of mediating between the two.

summerisis (353 days ago)
I wouldn`t worry about it. Let your mother and MIL work out their differences. I recognize that you would like everyone together but I, personally, don`t see it as worth getting in the middle of. And your hubby should be working with his mother, not you. (I read a lot on this topic.) This is SO not worth an argument and the Grandma`s have to find their place. Thank goodness I don`t have to deal with this stuff! Good luck to you! (Now and with future MIL issues.)

cko1522 (355.3 days ago)
I was in the same boat, my sisters offered to throw the shower, and my MIL insisted on having her own. At first I thought it was weird and I was a little pissed, but it actually worked out great. My MIL invited 50 people, my sisters ended up being very glad that my MIL had her own, because it was going to be a challenge for them to accomodate that many people. Also, each shower was fun because everyone at them knew eachother. There was no uncomfortable issues with trying to blend families and make small talk. But the most important thing is that everyone involved understands this is a party for you and your baby...and they should respect your wishes.

monica9 (355.6 days ago)
i dont know, i feel it should be 1 big shower. you are all family now, the baby is going to be 1/2 your mothers granddaughter and 1/2 your mil`s. so why shouldnt you be able to have a shower with 1/2 your side and 1/2 his? if you want 1 shower, then have 1 shower. you can have your husband ask why she is so adament about having a seperate shower.

MAGGIEMAE (355.7 days ago)
Ask your husband to talk to her for you or if you have a strong relationship with her then you talk to her. Just by letting her know that you would love to have all the families together and that it means a lot to you hopefully she is thinking of your feelings and will understand. Good luck

preggo-with-baby-2 (356.1 days ago)
MIL`s are difficult. They don`t always intend to be, but as DILs it hard to deal with them sometimes. I would just explain that you and your husband would like everyone to be together. You hope that she will participate and encourage the rest of her family to, and maybe she could help with some of the planning. Let your mother know that it`s important that this baby be brought into a family that can get along and work together when needed, and by her letting the MIL help with some of the overwhelming details of the shower...you would be very grateful and she would be less stressed. If she doesn`t want help, maybe she could let the MIL plan some of the games or something simple. Stick with your decision that you and your husband have made. If your MIL refuses to attend and her family follows suit, then that will be their choice. Hopefully they will see that this means a lot to you, and they will put their feelings aside for you/your husband/and you new baby! Good luck!

mia (356.2 days ago)
Why does your MIL need to throw a separate shower for just their family? I would be annoyed with MIL, but if she throws you a second shower, more gifts for you! =)

bellybumbles (356.2 days ago)
I am in the same situation, but they are trying to keep it a suprise, lol...thank god i don`t have to be in on that argument! good luck.

lets-manga (356.3 days ago)
I ended up giving in and agreeing to have two showers, even though I feel the same way as you do and would rather have our families together. I decided that in the end it was easier than stressing over it.

echo (356.3 days ago)
okay heres the story. My mom seems at times to bite off more than she can chew. so i was tryin to get her some help. well my sisinlaw had already offered to help out and stuff helpin my mom. well my MIL insists that she and the sisinlaw do a shower with hubbys family. hubby and i both want our families in the same place at the same time cause its hard to get both families together ya know. except at weddings and you only get married once ya know! (well to the person your with) so i called my mom to talk to her bout it and she said that we were goin to stick with the same plan and have all of the family together. im so disfunkional because i talked to the MIL after i talked to my mom and she sounded like i didnt want her to have nothing to do with it! She gets on my nerves at times because she does things out of spite i think. but thats a whole other story! so i just need some advice...should i just keep it with the whole family together or just let the moms do what they want? grr....

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