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Juniper (172.2 days ago)
Hmm difficult decision to make.. It is a really personal thing if you want people around or not.. my whole family came for Kai`s birth but no one stayed at the house.. those from out of the country stayed in a little hotel around the corner (their decision not mine) for a few days.. then when Kai was a few months old we went to stay with them for a while. My sister came back and stayed over for the first week.. it was lovely for a few days, but my partner and I really needed to connect.. just the two of us and our new baby and well my sister luckily only stated a few days before going back to my mum`s (half an hour away) and so we didn`t have to ask her to go... which would have been uncomfortable to do, but I would definitely have done so if need be and she wouldn`t have taken it badly at all. I know when I was born both pairs of grandparents came to stay with my parents to `help out with everything` but really all they wanted to do was hold me and feed me and so my mum ended up doing so much work and says she had a horrible time those first few weeks. I guess it really depends on if you want the help or not.. maybe say to them that you really appreciate the offer of help, and they are welcome to stay for a few days - or maybe find a cheap hotel near you..but no more than that as you want to share this specialy time with your husband and new baby. Im sure they will understand!! Do whatever you feel most comfortable doing.. you dont want to regret your decision either way.

jeanette (173 days ago)
It seems like your `quirky` cleanliness has become a guilded prison in which you reside. Have you concidred the option of just dropping your anxiety and surendering to the flow of life? Believe it or not, this is an option. If you don`t stop this suffering at the source, you`ll inevitably hurt them or your husband.

ktfantas (174.3 days ago)
I no exactly what you mean and I want my first few weeks and so on to be my husband and I only. Your family can stay at a motel. If you need help you can ask but it`s your baby and as a couple you chose to have the baby- you arn`t having it for their pleasure.

shell1981 (174.9 days ago)
dont worry i am exactly the same. personally if it was me i would say it would be better for them to stay a long weekend when the baby is a few weeks old, just say you will be too tired and you want just the 3 of you to bond first, dont feel bad

erphn (179.5 days ago)
Just say you`re taking a `babymoon` think honeymoon only with baby! Add, `we`ll give you and shout and send out some pics once we`re settled....`

mdbabyno1 (179.7 days ago)
I totally understand where you are coming from. I am a neat freak too and it really is stressful having things out of place. I would just tell them you need a few weeks to get in the swing of having a new baby at home and you would love for them to come and visit once he is a few weeks old and things have settled down. It`s going to be a very special time for your new family to bond so make sure the first few days/weeks go as you invision them.

roxannie (179.8 days ago)
If you are going to breast feed and this is your first...TRUST ME you dont want to ave all kinds of company there...your going to need time to adjust...maybe if they come not the first week but the second that would be a better idea...I definatley dont think your going to need that much help with a brand new baby who sleeps and eats most of the time you and your husband will be just fine alone ( or your mom or something because moms can show you the ropes) But i am a cleaning nut too and that would make me crazy..it wil be best if you can just focus on learning how to adjust first

KarenVG (179.8 days ago)
You have to go with what works for you. Say you Just want to try and figure a routine and for you that works better with an empty house. Think of other ways they might help, maybe in advance they could get you some meals in the freezer as you will need some easy food on hand. Even if you don`t like it or eat it they don`t have to know that! Just make them feel useful and they will understand the delay in them coming over. I am sure you have things you know they are good at that you can put to good use before the baby arrives so take advantage of their willingness and you shouldn`t have to feel guilty if they take the delay a little hard. Good luck!

gr8scottswife (179.8 days ago)
The most important thing is that you are comfortable. You will have a new baby. You`ll need to be focused on the little one and bonding rather than taking care of others and worrying about their messes. Do you really want to be so stressed out that your first days with your baby are strenuous and stressful? Tell them firmly that only your husband and you will be at your house for the first x weeks. Tell them that after x weeks, they are more than welcomed to come visit. Forget how they feel. Bonding with your baby is the most important thing.

RobinG (179.8 days ago)
I know this is hard and I can completely understand your concern BUT having had 3 kids I would have done anything to have help in the beginning ~ it isnt always easy. The help will far outweight the mess. Besides it is a good time to practice ~ kids make lots of messes :) I do think that a few weeks each is to much though ~ I think a few days each is more reasonable ~ and a good compromise :) Maybe have them come after a week for a few days. I agree with nan639 ~ my sister was a neat freak but not anymore, lol. She realized if her house was spotless her kids werent being played with as much as she wanted them to be so she cleans certainly but has toned it down alot for their best interests :)

**Lubug** (179.9 days ago)
Even though you are upset about the idea of it all..maybe a day or two might not be so bad...however if you KNOW you will be more stressed...you could just tell them you would really like this time for you and your husband to get to know your baby..you will still be recovering and respectfully you just don`t feel that you will be up for round the clock company(even if they do have the best of intentions!) and who knows after a few weeks when you are feeling up to it..maybe it wouldn`t be so nerve racking to have the company when you able to move around to pick up EVERYONES MESS!!!Good luck!!

Nan639 (179.9 days ago)
You`re a control freak. I`m the same way. Trust me though, your life is about to be turned upside down when your little one is born. All routines and schedules you had before are going to go out the window. Yes, you will need time to adjust. If they could put off their visit a few weeks, that would be great. Stop beating around the bush and come straight out and tell them. They are young and single and have no clue. You need to set the rules. But I would invite them after the few weeks. No they don`t have your same housekeeping skills, etc., but you seriously need to loosen up on that anyway. A destructive toddler will change that quick. lol Good luck!

frogsnack (179.9 days ago)
Being at home for the first time with a new baby can be very stressful but at the same time wonderful.For me it was a time where I just wanted it to be my husband, me and the baby, people stopped by and that was great but you have to adjust to the new addition and sometimes it is easier with less people in your house. I think you should let the girls know that you really want a few days with your family and than after you adjust maybe they can come stay for a few days.don`t be afraid to expess how you feel you don`t want your first days at home with the baby to be unhappy ones. Good Luck!

MJamison (179.9 days ago)
I understand how you feel.. I am really about the same way.. I am not sure if I hurt peoples feelings or not.. but i straight out told people that I needed time to figure things out on my own. I appreicate all the help that was being offered, but I would rather get the hang of everythign right away then my house being filed with people for weeks and then me having to learn everything when he is a month old and plus also I think it will take away from the first bonding experience between you guys.. tell them just to wait a couple weeks.. Hope that helps!



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