captshelley`s poll Show results | Hide results

3blessings (1179.8 days ago)
Honestly, I put that you should provide it, only because if this guy is a deadbeat, you have no idea what he has/doesn`t have for your child. While it is totally unfair, pack a diaper bag anyway because it gives you the peace of mind knowing that your child has everything they need. I wouldn`t drop my child off anywhere without the proper stuff because I don`t want them to do without just because daddy is an a-hole! He`ll get his someday, karma is a b**ch

kimmarie (1181.9 days ago)
I ALWAYS provided everything. That way I knew he was being well taken care of. Not so much that he was dead beat dad but I feel the need to be in control...Eventually he bought his own car seat. But I still provided bottles, food, diapers, extra clothes, bibs, medicine, baby wipes, toys, baby spoons, etc....

tto (1182.3 days ago)
Maybe he could pay you for these things but if he buys them you have no quality control and you never know what crap he`s going to get.

Daydays Mom (1182.4 days ago)
the father should have his own things in his house.

megandgrace (1182.4 days ago)
i was wondering the same thing about my situation but lucky for me he hasn`t even called me to start the visitations that the court gave him.

carla81 (1182.5 days ago)
He should have the essential: diapers, formula/baby food, baby wipes, lotions etc. But like everyone else said, don`t leave it chance and pack the things you know your baby will definitely need anyway, at least until you know for sure that the dad is responsible and has all that`s needed.

sadielady (1182.7 days ago)
dad definately should,, but i guess it depends. if hes not reliable maybe send things with baby just in case

KarenBG (1182.7 days ago)
Dad SHOULD but for your peace of mind, I would.

jenakers (1182.7 days ago)
Well he SHOULD provide all of these things, but, I`d say food and diapers. That way you KNOW the baby has food and clean pants. For a dead beat dad, I wouldn`t count on him for these. You don`t want baby to go hungry. He can`t have the baby unless he has a carseat in the car.

RobinG (1182.7 days ago)
I would provide some of the items ~ I would discuss with him prior to the visit what items he has and has planned on purchasing prior to the visit ~ come to an agreement on what he will have and what you need to provide ~ the more you agree on it the easier the visit will go for the baby. What if he says he has it and he didnt get it then baby doesnt have it ~ like formula, what if he buys the wrong brand? My DH has gotten the wrong thing at times cause `hes a guy` and they arent as in tune as we are at times. I think you should provide the car seat and leave the base, provide formula so you know it is the right stuff, his fav blanket and toys, dad can add to it, dad should have the wipes and diapers already as well as the pack n play/bed for sleeping. If he doesnt then I wouldnt allow the visit til he does. If he is a dead beat dad do you want to leave him with the baby? Perhaps him visiting you is better til you know the baby is well taken care of. Last thingyou want is a dead beat dad with a crying baby he doesnt know how to comfort and console. Even a good loving dad who isnt near their baby much will be nervous and worry they arent doing it right or be unable to cosole the baby. I wouldnt feel comfortable dropping my baby off til I know he was safe and sound.

TwinklinBrwnEyes (1182.7 days ago)
I would definatly suggest to him that he provide these things for him/her being he is the father and if he refuses then maybe you can tell him he can`t see the baby until he does! If you have to do it he should as well. But on the other hand if he has no means to provide these items then so be it, you gotta do what`s best for all you. Good luck.

readyforbaby (1182.7 days ago)
Well my brother in law passed away and had a 3 month old baby and a b***h as girlfriend so we get my nephew like once a week sometimes more we always have the stuff ready for my nephew at the house! She somethimes will leave us a bag but it doesnt really have crap in it! So if he is a dead beat dad I would make sure he has all the stuff your baby needs before he could have your baby!!



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