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scaredmommy`s poll Show results | Hide results


Baby-poll poll Does your husband help with baby in the middle of the night? Mine rarely helped with my 1st two children and doubt he will help much with this baby. Did you have to convince him to help or did it come naturally for him. Please comment!
(Baby poll by scaredmommy, 186 days ago)
Yes he helps, getting up with the baby is his idea
Yes he helps, but I have to ask
No, he sleeps through everything
No he believes it's the mother's responsibility


Vote to see the results

Comments: 25

scaredmommy (180 days ago)
Our seven year old still wakes up nightly crying saying she is scared and it takes anywhere from a minute to an hour to get her back to bed. Our two year old never wakes up unless she is sick which is almost never. And in a less than a month our baby will be born. I am exhausted now getting up with our seven year old so I know I will be running on empty if I don`t have some kind of help from my husband. I don`t need his help nightly but a couple times a week would be wonderful! I need my sleep just as much as my husband does. Yes, he works outside the home but I work also (raising three children is fun but hard work) it doesn`t matter the location of where you work -the fact is my husband works and I am a stay at home mother (a very important job).

carla81 (185.3 days ago)
My hubby and I pretty much share everything, although because I breast fed I would be the one to get up during the night, especially as hubby works full time. But from when I stopped breast feeding, through the week when hubby worked I`d get up to resettle bubs, but hubby would do one night on the weekend for me so I could have a break and a full night sleep/sleep in. When my hubby is home we take turns with meals, I`ll do breakfast, hubby do lunch, I do dinner, then hubby puts bub to bed and we swap the next day. My hubby enjoys it. He`s Kyan`s parent too so he wants to help out. Because hubby does so much, Kyan is just as comfortable and content with my hubby as he is with me. We try to share the load when my hubby is home on weekends etc. I, obviously, do a little more through the week when hubby is working. We`re both parents, so we both contribute.

military~mommy (185.5 days ago)
DH and I both work full time, and in the beginning I had to kick him several times to wake him up. By 3 or 4 months we were in a great every-other-night schedule, and now that our daughter sleeps through the night if she does happen to randomly wake up we will take turns with that as well. Also, SAHMs work their butts off 24/7. I believe a husband should support his wife by helping with their child.

3girls2008 (185.5 days ago)
as a SAHM the last comment was almost an insult. I work as hard if not harder throughout the day and to say my hubby shouldnt have to get up in the middle of the night to help is insane! He did get up and we took shifts but when should a SAHM day end?? never?? its alot more work than most people think it is!

Khloes Mommy (185.6 days ago)
Personally, & this is just my opinion but I think if you are a stay at home mom you should be doing the night work as well. If hubby has to get up and go to work he should be able to get some good sleep. I work part time & hubby works full time I still do all the night stuff myself, even when I have to get up at 4 in the morning, this is by choice though.

daydays mom (185.6 days ago)
my husband and i use to fuss and fuss bout this topic. i mean he acted like i was the one who does everything. and purdy much still do. he will get up with her so i can rest. but man its a pain in the ass when shes crying and hes got her and hes huffing and puffing so i usually have to get up anyways.

waiting4mymiracle (185.6 days ago)
Hey I havnt had my baby yet but my husband is all for doing the night shifts. I think that it depends on wether your partner is working full time or not wether he will help u out or not even if he doesn`t do the late night feeds he should at least help out when he`s home u need a break sometimes as well. Good luck

dollhouse (185.7 days ago)
I`m with soon2b3. My husband and I both do EVERYTHING equally. He usually gets the baby and changes him, then I feed him and put him back to bed. I guess it just depends on what works for you as a couple :)

marli (185.7 days ago)
He gets up but only on the weekends when he doesn`t have to work. I take care of him the rest of the time.

gr8scottswife (185.8 days ago)
He rarely gets up if that is what you mean.

Amanda-is-Rebekahs-Mommy (185.8 days ago)
In the beginning my hubby was always the one to get up and get the baby, he also changed her diaper and re-swaddled her before handing her to me to feed, then I`d get up and put her back to bed. He did a lot of the fetching because I had a broken tailbone that REALLY hurt to get up and down out of bed, but he changed the diapers on his own. I didn`t even change a single diaper in my daughter`s first week of life (largely due to the broken tailbone and it took literally a full minute for me to get up, it was more efficient for him to do it, and he really didn`t mind doing that for me to save me the pain of getting up and moving around. Plus I lost a lot of blood after delivery that I had a transfusion and because of that was anemic and didn`t have the energy to do most of the care, so for the first week (and most of that was spent in the hospital) my only duty with her was to feed her, after my hubby went back to work that changed, obviously I had to care for her while he was at work, but he came home and took over so I could eat and rest for a bit. My hubby is extremely supportive and helpful, to this day he still changes as many diapers as I do. Bekah doesn`t generally wake up in the middle of the night anymore so that`s not an issue, but when she does I tend to take care of her so hubby can sleep since he works earlier than I do.

busymommyof3 (185.8 days ago)
My husbamd works his Butt off so when hes working I dont but when hes home he will hold the baby while I get a diaper or go pee real quick. My treat is in the morning since he is a morning person, when the kids and or baby wakes up he lets me sleep in when hes home I love that so thats our trade off!! In the night all my kids slept so not unless they were going through a spurt and ate 24-7 its quiet @ night for us! =)

soon2be3 (185.8 days ago)
My husband and I both strongly believe that our kids are both our responsibilities. We both work full time and share in all duties related to kids, home and family. We have been together for nearly 18 years, married 10 in August. He does as many chores around the house as I do, he has changed as many dirty diapers as I have, and he loves it! He is an amazing father and husband...I honestly could never have dreamed him up. His mother and father have an incredible relationship and have been married for 37 years. They also share in their household chores and care for their kids. Grandpa has babysat many times and is awesome! I can only pray that we pass on this on to our kids too. I breastfed for 10 1/2 months and during that time, he would get the baby out of bed and bring him to me. I would nurse him and then give him back to daddy. He would change his diaper and cuddle him and then put him back to bed. Now that I am no longer breastfeeding, I prepare the bottle while hubby gets Carter. I give him the bottle and he feeds and puts him back to bed. It works for us and our family.

missyv28 (185.8 days ago)
I had to ask for help at first with my first born just because he didn`t know what to do haha...now he helps out on his own but if I need extra help I do have to ask

Mommy2Chloe (185.8 days ago)
My hubby does things throughout the day for me with Chloe. Of course, when we`re not working. At night he`ll get up to check on her if she`s crying and I wake him and tell him to check on her. that`s usually if I`ve gotten up already to check on her. Chloe`s really good with sleeping through the night. In the beginning when she wasn`t sleeping all night, he`d only get up with her when he didn`t have to work the next day. And that wasn`t every time, just a few. We both work full time so we try to share the responsibilities but I do tend to do more.

XX[o.o]xx (185.8 days ago)
I don`t think it`s the husbands responsibility. I don`t even think it`s their responsibility to do anything more then just play with the baby in the day time. By all means, if they want to help, that`s great, but biologically - it`s not their job or responsibility - so I wouldn`t and didn`t get bent out of shape when my hub was less then helpful.

summerisis (185.8 days ago)
My daughter is bottle-fed and my husband has helped in any way he could during the evening.

tommiesmommy (185.9 days ago)
My husband changes my son in the middle of the night because I physically cannot get up due to gall bladder attacks. I cosleep so besides diaper changes, there isn`t much I can`t do without his help.

TwinklinBrwnEyes (185.9 days ago)
Maybe I should add as well....I don`t ask for his help and I tell him many times to go back to sleep but he refuses. Now I feel really bad reading xoblondiexo comment. I think im gonna have a talk with him.

xolblondieox (185.9 days ago)
You know what, I should add too...is that I deciced upon doing things this way. He never told me, `no I won`t help.` I insisted that it be my responsibility. But, if you don`t want things this way, then definitely talk to him about it :-/

california-mom (185.9 days ago)
My husband works about 65 hours a week & Im a sahm so I do night stuff.

hillaryandmikesbaby (185.9 days ago)
i didnt answer because i havent had my baby yet. I plan on doing all the work at nighttime.. he works 7:30-6 and i will be a SAHM. I am also planning on BF and he cant really help there, im sure if i am sick or extremely tired he would be more than happy to get up. In my mind i believe its the mothers job to get up but everyone is different with different circumstances

xolblondieox (185.9 days ago)
No I never expected my husband to help with our twins at night. He is a very active participent in the evenings and on weekends, but he provides for our family and allows me to stay at home with our children. I adore him for that and totally admire how hard he works for us. He leaves for work around 6:30-7:00am. I would never dream of asking him to be up all night and then go to work for us the next morning. It is my job and I happily accept all duties 24/7. I know that one could look at it as, `well YOU get up all night and then YOUR job has to start all over again in the morning, so why can`t he do it too?`, but I don`t perceive things that way. Besides, it was for a stinking 7 weeks that I had to be up at night with them- and even at that it was never more than twice a night. And you bet your behind that it was because it was all on me that those babes were sleeping through at 7 weeks LOL!

TwinklinBrwnEyes (185.9 days ago)
Funny you ask, hubby and I were just talking about this. He didn`t help at all at night with my first two either. Im a stay at home mom and he works long hours and he still wakes with me every night at every feeding (2-4 times a night). This time around he`s a totally different man/daddy!! It took no convincing! Maybe to because he`s a little older (32) with my other two he was in his early 20`s. Just start making comments now (try the nice approach first). Good luck.

christinaswar (185.9 days ago)
What kind of things are you doing in the middle of the night that you need help with? My husband will take Kara potty in the night sometimes. Other than taking her potty at night (from 5 months on) there wasnt anything to do at night. I would change her quickly in bed before I nursed her in bed and go right back to sleep as soon as she latched on.



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