~angel~`s poll Show results | Hide results

summerisis (141.6 days ago)
I think it`s your day and you need to do EVERYTHING to make YOU comfortable...

mommyof4girls (142 days ago)
I have always wanted my mom there with me, whether we were close at that time or not. She has only been able to there for my first and everytime i think about that day i wanna cry. The dad was not invovled then and lived out of state.We are together now and are on our 3rd&4th babies~TWINS! I also live out of state now:( My mom stayed there for everything, was my coach, cut my daughters cord and the first to hold her. It meant the world to my mom and I. My mom was also diagnosed with breast cancer when i found out in was pregnant. So i think it really depends on the person and maybe the reason why you are not so close. I know i will be there when my daughter`s give birth to all of their babies.

shocked-over-3 (142.1 days ago)
When I got preggers for my first baby,my mom and I weren`t close-we`d been through alot of the teenage crap right before then and I think her being there for his birth was a good thing..Everybody (mostly) wants their mom when they are sick or in pain and she really helped me...She was there for baby #2 last year and will be there this time too hopefully! It`s good for them to see their grandchild born too-makes for a great bonding moment...But if you`re really uncomfortable with her being there for the actual birth,at least have her there for parts of it....I thought it might be weird,but I`m glad I had my mom there. Also,moms have been though all that,so they can be very supportive. I had horrible back labor for both of my labors and I NEEDED the extra hands my mom provided that DH couldn't on his own!

ArcticArlz (142.1 days ago)
I would think you should only have people you are 100% comfortable with, I love my mother, but she can say/do things that set me off, I plan to just have myself and my husband there for delivery.

Elijahs Mommy (142.2 days ago)
i think you should do whatever is comfortable to you. When i gave birth to my son me and my mom weren`t and still aren`t on good terms and probably never will be but i let her there for his birth just because she was his grandmother and i wanted her there because i was scared and didn`t know what could have happened and she comforted me.

MummyLJ (142.3 days ago)
I only had DH and the nurses/doc for both babies. My mom was in town for my first delivery, and she was a little disappointed that I didn`t want her in there, but I felt it was an important moment in my marriage/life with my husband, and I wanted it to be just the two of us. Also, I was worried DH would be pushed to the background in all of the excitement (my mom can get a little enthusiastic lol) Moral of the story: Do what you feel most comfortable with. Good luck!

RobinG (142.3 days ago)
((hugs)) I only had hubby ~ saw no reason to have anyone else :) My husband was VERY helpful and not at all useless :)

nmck (142.4 days ago)
I think you and your husband should talk about what would make both of you most comfortable, since you are not too close with your mom.

mumzie1212 (142.4 days ago)
i think you should do whatever you feel comfortable with. my mom was in the room but completely by accident (i pushed for so long that she showed up to the hospital thinking that i must have had the baby already). but she sat in the corner of the room and kept quite. she had 5 kids of her own and still was kind of horrified. i only did not want her there because we are sooo close, i didnt want her to see me go throught he pain and such, she really worried about me. it was actually really hard for her, this time she is not invited until after the baby is born or she will wait outside and she is completely understanding of that.

mamabear7406 (142.5 days ago)
I had originally said I only wanted my husband, but then a few weeks beforehand I decided I wanted my mum. This time around I will have my cousin and a close friend. I think my mum is probably a bit hurt by this but a lot has gone wrong with our relationship since last time and I don`t feel comfortable with her being there this time. If your not comfortable with your mother, then don`t ask her to come in with you. She will just have to deal with it, its you going through the labour and its entirely up to you who is there with you.

busymommyof3 (142.6 days ago)
Our birth plan was to only be my hubby and I! We told everyone and they understood! My sister and I are not so close and I she was kind of * hinting * she wanted to , but I told her we wanted only us! I always let people visit during labor but once its time to push then they leave. Be most people do change their mind in the moment of labor! So tell people your birth plan is just you and hubby and if you change your mind then you can!

luvbeingamom (142.7 days ago)
Through out my pregnancy i said i didn`t want anyone in the delivery room outside of the docs and my husband. My mom and i are fairly close, but still don`t want that. Then when the time came, i so didn`t care. I left it up to her. She could stay if she wanted to. She stayed and then was there for my second son`s birth too. But by the time the second was born i could have had a parade through the room and wouldn`t have cared. I lost most modesty with #1, but by #2 i so didn`t care!! :-) Think about it and prepare he for the worst (not being in the room) and then leave it in your mind to make the choice at the time. JMO! Good Luck and Congrats!

megeanua (142.7 days ago)
My mom and I are very close, however I have already told her that I don`t feel that I would be comfortable with her in the delivery room. She was a little upset at first, but now she has accepted it and feels that it should be a very special time for my fiance and I.

snlt4hm (142.7 days ago)
I am going through the same debate right now. I am planning to have my hubby as my primary coach, but can`t decide about mom. We are VERY close, but mom can sometimes be harsh w/ my dh when she thinks he is not taking good enough care of me. I personally want her in there but dont want her to hurt my hubby`s feelings on such a special day and cause tension. I think what i have decided is to have her come in and out to give my dh breaks from stress and message... if he needs to take a breather or get a coffee or something, she will be there, but i dont know if i want her in there the whole time. My hubby can sometimes be helpful but clueless about what i want or need where mom is usually pretty in tune with helping. I say that `labor day` is about us moms and whatever will help us get through it is what goes. Good luck deciding!

butterblocksmom (142.7 days ago)
Well, you`ve already had 2 kids so do you think she will add to or reduce your stress in that situation? Don`t do anything for anyone else when it comes to your baby/your body. If you think you and hubby need help and she is the appropriate person, go for it. If you are thinking to do this because she wants to or because you think it would be `nice`, I wouldn`t do it. I have an ok relationship with my mom but in that situation, she would drive me absolutely crazy. Just thinking about it makes me want to swear. She totally stressed me out during my labour (leaving phone messages with repeated requests to let her know what was happening...WTH woman, I`m having a baby and I`m in pain, what do you THINK is happening????) and then being weird and possessive at the hospital when baby was just hours old. There is no amount of money anyone could pay me to allow her in the room (unless she was gagged and hogtied). This experience is for hubby and me...

aidensmommy1 (142.7 days ago)
Do what you feel will be the most helpful and comfortable for you. I did not have my mom and she was very upset with me for awhile but I am so much closer to my sister so I had her and my man. It was nice to have two people in there with me because my sister was in charge of videotaping and pics because I knew my man would be horrable at that! Anymore then two people I would have been overwhelmed. I know what you are going through because I had to make the decision with my mom, do what you feel is best and it is totally up to you. Good luck and congrats on your soon to be little one!!

ladobruk (142.7 days ago)
It might be helpful to have your Mom there also. Men can be pretty useless when it comes to anticipating your needs and speaking up for you when needed. Moms can be much better at that. It may help to bring you closer together as well. If you think she can do that, then go for it. But, if she is going to make you uptight or create any stress for you then I would pass.

nutnut (142.7 days ago)
you definatly need to do what makes you comfortable. my mother wasnt in the delivery room with me, and honestly i think she would pass out if she were LOL! im pretty particular with people in the delivery room with me. i only had my partner with me. i know my friends wanted to be in there but i was just not comfortable with that. im a very private person. i didnt even want all the nurses in there but i had no choice lol! if you really dont want your mother or anyone else in there, you should just tell her youre not exactly comfortable with it. she might be hurt but shes your mother and should understand. good luck in whatever you decide. =D

googie32 (142.7 days ago)
I had my Mom for my first delivery (she passed away so she couldn`t be there for the others) and thank goodness because my ex-husband was useless...however we were very close...If your not that close and are having reservations about it then I would tell her you want just you and your hubby...it`s your labour and it`s your choice. Do what you feel most comfortable with otherwise she will add stress to the situation and that`s the last thing you need during labour.

tylersmommy54 (142.7 days ago)
i think you should do what`s most comfortable for you. if your stressed during birth it`s only gonna make it more difficult. i think if it doesn`t feel right to you having your mom in there then go with that. if anything you can just tell her that you and your husband would like the birth to be a private moment for the two of you but let her know that she can meet the baby first chance given.



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