jenakers`s poll Show results | Hide results

california-mom (762 days ago)
Children without question-IF MY HUSBAND WERE TO BE MEAN OR ABUSIVE TO OUR CHILDREN I WOULD LEAVE HIM. BUT if my children were to become mean or abusive to my husband (their father) I would not leave them, easy as that. My children are me...

MichelleMc(pink!) (762.1 days ago)
I don`t have children yet, but I just wanted to briefly comment to seconandexcited (I hope no one minds): It is not bad at all to say that you and DH are in counseling. Huge kudos to you both for being willing to get counseling for your marriage! *hugs* Also, you might check out the book `The Five Love Languages.`

ammm (762.4 days ago)
I wonder how many marriages that are not doing well would be doing better had the spouses put each other first. Secondandexcited - sorry to hear that yours isn`t on the best terms right now. Good luck and I hope the counseling helps. The way I see it, by putting your spouse first, you are putting your children first as well.

3blessings (762.4 days ago)
Since you put it that way, it does make a lot of sense! I guess I just chose my children because DH and I don`t have the greatest relationship. My kids always come first with me, then him. It`s just how it is with me...because who knows what will happen between DH and I. But my kids will always be there. It seems kinda bad to say, but DH and I are in counseling. But I know that my kids will always be first

mskitty (762.5 days ago)
Hmm.. I chose kids, then spouse. But after reading what you ladies are saying it does makes sense to put spouse first. But in a way no matter what your kids come first, like Jeff said. IF baby is hungry you don`t make sure Hubby is ok before tending to baby. But I agree with a happy, solid married most will just fall into place. I guess it`s kinda of hard to pick thinking about it now, in different ways they are both first.. I`m always last! I bet we can all agree on that one. lol

Dezzi (762.5 days ago)
I am all for spouse befor kids. Don`t get me wrong, i love my daughter to bits!! Janakers, Melissajoanne, Jeff and Wildbunch explained it nicely!

jeff (762.5 days ago)
your kids will grow up and leave (as they are supposed to)... your spouse is your 100% rock there till death do you part. It makes me sad how many people are choosing kids over spouse. (and obviously if the baby is hungry he gets fed before my hubbie gets a hug (its a need)... but hubbie is my #1 which is why i married him.... and why we will STAY married)

hunnybunnysmama (762.5 days ago)
I think it`s too complicated to pick just like that. For me, it would depend on the situation...I guess.

Str8 As (762.5 days ago)
Yep my spouse first here too! Well said Jenakers, MelissaJoanne, and Wildbunch. Then my children, then my parents!

marisha (762.5 days ago)
of course children first, are you kidding me??? it`s a different kind of love! spouse and parents, also so different and can`t even compare! but most DEFINITELY my son comes above everything and everyone.

MiniOface (762.5 days ago)
Well said Jenakers, melissajoanne and wildbunch, you took the words right out of my mouth.

MelissaJoanne (762.5 days ago)
It`s not exactly choosing my spouse over my children... I think if I were running into a burning building and could grab my daughter or my husband (not that I could carry him!) I`d grab my daughter. But - our marriage is the beginning of our family, and out of that relationship we chose to grow our family with a child. It`s more that we want to give our children the gift of a happy marriage, rather than two people that are together solely because they are connected by having children together. After our children have grown, it will once again be the two of us, just as it all began. Big question, sort of hard to explain. :-p

jenakers (762.5 days ago)
I chose my spouse over my children. He came first. With out him there would be no children and after they have grown up and moved away, I will be left with my DH. I feel like WE are a unit working through life. I see so many older women that put their children before their husbands. When the kids leave they are left distant from their husbands, don`t know what to do with themselves and sometimes even divorce. My relationship with my husband comes first. We are a team working in the best interest of our children.

monkeymamma (762.5 days ago)
Children first for sure! Hard part was deciding parents or spouse next.

MrCheeks23 (762.5 days ago)
definately children first for me...

3blessings (762.5 days ago)
I`m suprised that some ladies chose their spouse over their children....



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