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Scared
Added: 80 days ago.
Added by: babyluna
Section: Birth.
Status: This question is Closed. (Questions will be closed after 10 days.)


I am currently 30 weeks pregnant, and I am so scared! I have seen a couple of the vaginal birht videos and I am scared to death, this is my first baby, a gorgeous baby girl, and c-sections come into 2nd place as far as giving birth, I would like to go all natural, can someone please tell me if it is normal to feel this way? specially towards the end of your pregnancy????

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wildberry - 79 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) of course it's normal to be scared you are about to do something that seems just horrible but let me say once you get into it all that fear melts away all you can think about is bringing that beautiful baby into the world i wont lie it hurts but only for a little bit i have delivered two babies at home the first weighed 9lbs 11oz and this baby weighed 10lbs is i can so it i know that you can and you will be great!!!

niseybear - 79 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Sure it's normal to be scared. I was, but I was more excited than anything. Stop watching those videos! I think they purposely show you the worst of it. I had an epidural because I know my tolerance for pain. The contractions that I did feel I was like whoa...is that what they are??!! LOL That was early in the afternoon. My OB told me they only get stronger and worse the closer you get. My son was born at 7:01 the evening of Dec. 4th and it was a WONDERFUL experience! I can't wait to do it again. Best of luck to you and you do what you think is best!

lady26 - 79 days ago Rating: 5 (1 votes) This is my first pregnancy too and I am also nervous. I want to go all natural with a midwife but my husband is so against it, he thinks I should do a hospital birth and get an epidural.

Baby3OnWay - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) YES!!! I am on number three and I still freak about it. My first I had an epidural and it was great! 6 hour of labor and delivery(2 of that was pushing. The recover was a good 6 weeks though and tough but not as bad as you may think. Second baby I had my water broke and went into labor and had the baby all natural in 53mins... one push and he was out!! recovery was amazing, I was up and walking within an hour and recovery was about a week. This time I opt to do natural as it was so much better on my body and reovery afterwards.... the pain is more the contractions then anything and not in the vag... you don' feel what you may think you would feel down there I PROMISE!!!! unless your giving birth to a giant. My kids were all near 8lbs... best of luck and its normal to stress and wory about the unknown, and in my case the known! lol

brandi j. - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Absolutely!!!! It's completely normal to be scared of the unknown! Also, everyone is different, some ppl say it's not that bad, others say its horrible, so it is so hard to know what it will be like for you! I had my #4 all natural, I used an exercise ball that I used as a birthing ball, and I think this is part of the reason my labor went so quickly, b/c this allowed her to engage into my pelvis how she needed to. I suggest that you go to this website, it helped me to understand the different stages of labor and what to expect and it has labor coach tips as well. http://www.birthingnaturally.net/ Also, please know that if you end up w/ an epidural or a c-section that you still did an excellent job, this is not "chickening out", you still got your baby into the world safely and that is the ultimate goal and you did excellent!!!!! :o)

Melanie07 - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Completely normal. You need to try and relax. When the time comes, everything will go the way it is supposed to. I suggest an epidural. I didn't have it with my first two. I had it with the last. If I had to do it over, I would have it with all three. You can enjoy the whole experience more with the epidural. Try going to a birthing class. They can ease your mind on what to expect.

stephandisaac - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Totally normal ! I don't think there is a woman out there that can HONESTLY say she wasn't nervous to give birth. Be prepared for a c-section too though. I had to have one with my boys for emergency reasons not because I wanted one. Some women get so upset when they can't have the baby natural, but it doesn't make you any less of a mother. Good luck hun and hope you can relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy...your little one will be here soon :)

ashleyandcaleb - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) I haven't been through it but i know that its normal.just try to keep in mind the reason its all happening,focus on the baby and you'll be fine,"im going through all this this pain for a couple of hours for a lifetime of bliss"..its worth it.

Cindie - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) it's normal.. I will have a natural birth however not drug free.. I can NOT deal with that sort of pain so I will get an epidural. :)

sarahann - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) What you are feeling is completely normal. I desperately wanted a natural birth, I was extremely fearfull that I may have needed a C-section and I didn't know what I would do if I had to have one (I have a phobia of operations and being cut open). As it turned out, I had a great midwife and despite minor complications I had a vaginal birth with some tearing and an episiotomy. I also had an epidural which helped a great deal. It wasn't an easy or pleasant birth, there were a few problems, but it is so true when people say that you quickly forget the pain, etc. To be honest, I don't remember a lot about the birth at all. I couldn't even hear the doctors and midwife talking, all I could hear at the time was my partner talking to me, telling me what they were saying. You will get through it. It is the most amazing experience anyone could ever have. As long as you and the baby are healthy, nothing else matters. Enjoy it and enjoy those first few moments with your baby girl, it is so special.

Rebekahs-mama - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Of course it's normal to be scared, especially with your first! I'm sure you're all geared up for the worst pain that you could ever imagine, but...it's probably not going to be nearly as bad as you think. I personally thought labor was quite bareable. I focused so much of my energy on the deep breathing techniques taught in childbirth class that I was able to get through everything without pain relief. I know everyone has their own opinion on this subject, so I won't ever say birthing is easy! But I will say it was much easier than I ever imagined it would be. I think so much of it is about your attitude during the entire ordeal. Keep your mind open to possibly using pain relief, but take things one step at a time and you may get through it without. And in the end you will be wide awake and your baby will be alert and you can relish in those first few moments that you have waited so long for! Oh, one more thing...the labor nurses are absolutley wonderful! I cannot say enough of how they will change your life during this process!

Mommyof2boys - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Its normal for you to be anxious some women become talkative and chirpey others become anxious and some become depressed. I would rather be anxious or chirpey than the depressed. Try to talk your self calm and tell your self that our bodies are made for this and with all the wonderful doctors and new stuff out there its not a lot to worry about, you are in good hands.

eastern-Canadian-Lady - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) I wanted my baby, but not the pain. I used an epidural and it was the best decision ever! I felt everything up until 10:10 pm, that was when I had the epidural. I fell asleep immediately until the doc woke me up to push. (I told him to come back tomorrow, LOL! I was pretty tired, but not in pain at that point.) I had my daughter at 10:50 pm. My sister went all natural. I was there. I was surprised at how calm she was and at how little pain she seemed to be in. She told me that it was like having very bad diarrhea cramps and menstrual cramps at the same time. I was scared of giving birth, but I already knew I wanted an epidural, so it made the prospect of labour much easier on me. I agree with michaela. She said that you don't get any award for going without meds. They made the meds for a reason. People need them and use them all the time. I'm not telling you what you should do, just letting you know that there was no bad side effects for me or my child from having used an epidural. My doc also said that the walking I had done in pregnancy had really made my labour short compared to most first time births, so walk, walk, walk. (less than 6 hrs total, but less than 2 and a half of heavier labour) Hope this helps. Good Luck.

skittles0607 - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) It is normal.. I would go natural if I were you. It is the best thing in the world. I had both of my boys natural no medication no nothing.. It hurts while going thru it but when you look back on ityou are so proud of yourself..

niki - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Oh yeah - i was terrified i heard that many stories and i was kinda thinking just cut me open and take the baby out. I really dreaded the thought of the whole birth thing but at the end of the day every wee pain you get is so worth the bundle of joy you will hold in your arms when its all over - everyone has there own story to tell about giving birth but i must say i did have a quick delivery - i was induced and got alot of pain round my back and down the front of my legs - pushing her out was the easy part - i ripped and ended up with stitches being stitched up was the painful bit for me. I used gas and air and that was it - i was actually surprised what i had done was bring in a cd that i really liked Lionel Ritchie - helped me all the way - it relaxed me and i was quite calm throughout.... alot of people go on to have more than one baby so if the pain was that bad they wouldnt go through it again. I hope this sets your mind at ease. It will be over in a flash - people talk about being in labour for 40 hours plus but alot of that is only early stages - so it isnt that bad. Relax and try not to panic theres noone panics more than me and now ive been there done that and now live to tell my story. My baby is now 6 months old. Its the not knowing what to expect worries you. Take care x

Godispeace - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) It's normal for you to feel that way, I think every first time mom experiences the same anxiety. Not everyone goes through the same things, there are women that have less discomforts than others. In my experience I've never experience a midwife or "natural birth", if you are interested you should go for it but Isn't there a certain date where you have to let the clinic know how you want to deliver? You should inquire about that if you decide on that. My final opinion is that no matter what nature will do its job and when you have love ones around you to support you and be there for you when you're in pain, it's all worth it, there are times that labor can take 3 hours and there are others that can take 30 hours, there are plenty of medications to take the edge off if you don't want to go with an epidural. Good luck with your new baby princess.

gr8scottswife - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Hypnobirthing. Take herbs. Do the kegels. Believe that you can do it; it's as natural as breathing, sex, urinating, and blinking. When you are in labor, think about your body transforming like a transformer robot. The muscles move and the bones move to release your baby. This thought will help your body open up. Also, you can imagine your vagina getting as large as a grapefruit, big enough for your baby. This thought will also help your vagina open larger; hence, you'll have a smoother birth. The last thing you want to do is tense up. So, keep your mouth open, and try the hypnobirthing.

Sarah M - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) I have to say I was petrified!!! I had a very long labour and there were some complications. I didn't want an epidural but had one in the end. To be quite honest I don't remember much of the labour. When I had gas and air and pethidine I was that 'out of it' that I can't remember what happened. During the epidural part it was nice and relaxed. Once I started pushing I was so focused on that that nothing else mattered and now I can't remember much of that either. When the time comes you will do what you need to do and you wont think much of it. There will be times when you feel that you can't go through with it but that is natural (my midwife told me even she felt like that when she had her children!) but you will get through it and you will have a darling girl at the end. It sounds like a cliche saying it is all worth it and you forget the pain but it is true really. I honestly can't remember much of the hard stuff, just that feeling I had when I had my son who is now 7wks old. He was 10lb 1 when he was born so I'm not writing this having had a nice small baby, I'm not sure if size makes a difference as I have only had 1 but it did hurt!! I was of course releived it was over - no one should pretend that that is how they choose to spend their sunday evening haha but it is completely worth it! Your feelings are natural, it is something you haven't ever done before and we hear such horror stories but you will be so busy in your labour that during the painful parts the time flies past - at least thats how it was for me! Hope all goes well and remember there is no harm in doing what you need to to get through, if that means medication - take it!!!

christina1984 - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) totally normal. this is my 2nd and im freaking out at 25 wks. more power to u if u make thru all natural. not for me. i went thru 22 hours of labor athome with no meds and when i made it to the hospital literally just in time they gave me meds and everything was fine. of course all that was left was the pushing. i cant say dont be scared cuz i am too

michaela - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Yes it is normal, i was scared, now 6 months on, it all seems so surreal, i would do it again in a heartbeat. Labour is called labour for a reason, but totally worth every second (in my case all 42 hours). Your body goes into autopilot and naturlly copes with it. Don't get too stressed about it you will be absolutely fine. Don't forget to ask for drugs if you do need them, you don't get any gold stars for going without painrelief.

lizzie287 - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Everyone gets scared. I mean, giving birth is not a small task. Just try to stay calm and remember that the human body is an amazing thing, women have been giving birth for centuries, and there are those fantastic hormones that swoop in after birth to cause a sort of amnesia to the event. It's worth it to have your beautiful child in your arms. *hugs*

RandiLee - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) It is completely normal to feel this way. I'm really scared to...But when I start to freak out, I just remember that god made us for this...Our bodies were designed for it, and we get the biggest reward when it's over!

Debra - 80 days ago Rating: 5 (1 votes) Ok! You need to read 'Ina May's guide to childbirth" she is a leading midwife in the US, has delivered thousands of babies naturally and after reading her book, it totally took my fear away. Her book is full of POSITIVE stories that make you feel EMPOWERED, that birth is supposed to be natural and if you go into something full of hope and a desire to succeed, then you will. Her philosophy stems from a sense that if you think that you will fail, you will. If you think negatively about birth, then you will not have a successful delivery. One of the stories that stood out for me was how a small woman gave birth to a baby over 11 lbs, naturally without drugs. Our vagina's are designed to stretch to accomidate ANY baby that we grow- and if a doctor (who is usually male) intimidates you into thinking you cannot do it, then that is what usually happens. I was so full of fear before i read her book, and when I went into labour I was excited. My birth experience was painful, but the contractions were exciting as well. I knew that each one was helping me to dilate, feel open and bring my son into this world. When it was over, I felt sad that the experience was over and do look forward to my next child. I had the same feeling as if I had climbed a mountain or walked 20km across a low level sea (which I did a few years ago in Holland). WHen you reach land again you feel amazing, you can't believe you could do that. Birth is the same- women are entirely amazing that we can grow a baby and bring it into this world. We are strong and courageous! I did end up with a c/s in the end after labouring for 24 hours and dilating to 10cm relatively quickly with all my positive thoughts- but my son was breech and I needed to have an emergency c/s and the doctor refused to let me deliver him naturally. (at that point I agreed to the surgery as I just wanted a healthy baby) Still, i went through labour and I feellike I could have delivered him if he was head down- even if his head was 38cm (on the large side of normal size). Please read her book, feel encouraged that you can do this. Birth is not scary- its AMAZING!

agonzales - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) I felt the same way with my first pregnancy. Even with the second since it had been 7 years since being pregnant again. Everyones labor is different. Just cause it was really painful for one person doesnt mean it will with you. Some ladies go through labor like nothing and some are in so much pain they need the epidural. It all depends on how much pain you can tolerate. With my first it wasnt so bad. With the second I really felt it but its all worth it in the end. It must not be so bad if we all keep getting prego again lol. Take care sweety and good luck.

Shellybela - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) babyluna... I can only speak from my own personal experiences...I won't lie to you, labor is exactly that...labor! But I will tell you that once you give birht and they put that brand new baby on your chest...you really do forget it all! For me, breastfeeding was a more painstaking process than labor or childbirht!! Think positive...it tryllu is beautiful, no matter what!! Shelly

slg3233 - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Yes, it is normal to feel that way. When I went to go have my first child (she was also a baby girl)and my doctor told me that it was time for me to have her, I went to call my Dad and tell him that I was about to go and have her, I couldn't even tell him that I loved him because I was choking up from trying to hold back my tears because I was scared, I just had to hang up the phone right after he told me he was on his way. But for me my 1st delivery was not bad at all, my 2nd I felt it but it wasn't anything that I couldn't handle. And now I am 34 weeks with my 3rd. And in away I am scared but then again I am not. I was scared the first 2 times and i know I will probably be scared the day I go to have this one. But with both of my pregnancies I did not get the epidural, I got the pain medicine in the IV. And that is what I will do with this one as well.

monica9 - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Yes. you will have lots of different feelings especially of which way you want to deliver. I know when I hit 30 weeks I got really nervous. I am now 38 weeks and don't care how she comes out, I just want her to come before 40.1 weeks and want her to be safe. your nerves will calm as you get closer, sounds like it would be the opposite but they really do calm later on and go for the natural birth if thats what you want. good luck!!

2xmom - 80 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Yes!! Your thoughts are very normal. I was like that with my second baby! Just take everything in stride. Follow your doctors requests. I have had 2 pregnancies, and 2 vag. births....both worked out fine in the end. No it's not all flowers and roses, just go with your instincts on pain medication if you want it. IMO I couldn't do it without an epidural. It was the biggest and best pain relief for me. It helped me bring my senses back together in order to think clearly and make it thru the delivery. Tell the doc and nurses what your birth plan is, and keep an open mind as you go. They understand what you're going thru, it's ok if you want pain meds. Good Luck!