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SISTER INLAW
Added:
64 days ago.
Added by:
jodiie
Section:
General.
Status: This question is
Closed. (Questions will be closed after 10 days.)
this is a little long but its an on going problem please give me any advice you have..
my boyfriend has two sisters one 16 ones 24 the 16 year old and i dont get on but thats a different story the 24 year old one has three kids 7 5 and 3 me & my boyfriend use to live with her and we was perminantly babysitting after we left she was always asking and i didnt mind at the start but then it was 3-4-5 times a week and for like .. 3-4 hours a time.. her kids are ( im sorry ) little basteds they DONT listen to me they never go bed always running around so im up and down the stairs every 3 mintures ( literally) telling them to get back in bed ive had so many complications and i was put on bedrest she asked me to babysit and i said i couldnt she went MARDY our birthdays are 2 days apart and on her birthday i was celabrating mine with my mates she wanted me to babysit i said i would any other day u know that but i cant tonight she then went to my boyfriend ( who knew if i didnt babysit he would have to and didnt want to ) and he fell out with me over it so i ended up not celebrating my 17th .... babysitting her BRATS.. she now.. has said and i quote `` ill always take the baby out for you give you a break`` `` babysitter you dont need one ill do it ill have it all the time `` TO HELL YOU WILL im sorry but she needs to look after he own kids before she does mine..i cannot STAND her is she serious? she spends little time with her own but wants mine 24/7 because its a baby and everyone loves someones elts baby until it shits or crys.. i DONT WANT her taking my baby anywhere.. and i mean not a walk to the shop.. not a day at the fair nothing i dont trust her and i dont like her look how hers have come out like?!.. but yh all ig et is MASSAVE arguments from my boyfriend about this ( id ont mind her sat holding or feeding my baby) just dont want her taking it out my sight.. after all `` she is its auntie `` and shes `` only trying to help`` i feel SOSOOOOOOOO strongly about this.. am i BANG out of order?
sassybuttaphly
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63 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
Stop watching her kids. You got your own child to take care of. Go with your gut instinct. Don't allow her to go anywhere with your child without you present.
niki
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63 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
Your best to do what you feel right, explain that your far from happy. take care x
katznkt
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
Dont watch her kids if you dont want to or dont feel up to it. Your boyfriend should understand, and he should know that he doesnt have to watch them all the time if you dont. That is what babysitters are for, and she should be willing to pay them if everybody else is busy with their life. That being said, you might want her to watch your baby if you get really frustrated, but just talk to her, and tell her (politely) that you are excited and probably wont need her to watch the baby very much at all. Your bf def needs to pick you over the sis, or you need a better one!!
wildberry
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
no go with your instincts if you feel that she should not watch your baby then don't let her watch your baby you have no obligation to let her watch your baby good luck hon
christina1984
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
she should watch hers 1st. u dont need to be chasing around 3 kids right now, u should be enjoying the time u have without them b4 u have urs. my ex's sister always made me babysit her daughter while i was pregnant with my 1st. i would wake up in the morning and she would be there and i would have no warning. she assumed i would do it cuz i wasnt working. at one period of time my ex had his kids and made me watch them too. let me tell u these kids were like the spawn of satan. the sisters kid was and still is the most spoiled child i ever met. his kids are just rotten, they would tell me at 3 and 4 to go to hell!the sister said oh i will watch the baby when it comes. i said to her one day (after hell with her kid) u should spend more then 5 mis a day with your own b4 u watch mine. she just wanted to play with my daughter cuz she was a newborn it turns out. anyway tell her u are not her personal nanny and would appreciate some respect.
paul02keisha05
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
no you are not you are totally right when you say how can she watch yours when she dont watch her own you dont have to watch her kids say no you did not lay up there and have them she did if your boyfriend has a problem with that then ask him who is he dating you or her it should not have to come down to you and him arguing over somebody elses kids
lady26
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64 days ago Rating:
5 (1 votes)
You should stand up for yourself and let her know you are not baby sitting her bad a$$ kids anymore, and if you on't feel safe with her having your kid don't let her take your kid. She has her own kids to take care of and why don't she let her younger sister watch her kids.
Baby3OnWay
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
NO... I'm the same way with my brother. hes good with my kids and I am greatful for that but I don't let him take them out, babysit them or anything because of his life choices past and present! There are times as a mother that you have to draw the line. It take a lot to let go of your first and only child as well. I am on number three and the only person I let watch my children/babysit is my mother. Not cousins, brother, friends... JUST MY MOM!!! haha my MIL I have given her a chance to have the kids a night here and there maybe once or twice a year and its hard. I can see where you are coming from and your man just has to understand that. The guys don't get the whole attatchment us moms have to our children and well being, they think we are crazy saying things like "not like they're goign to hurt the kids or anything" But in your eyes your thinking "and how do you know" take it easy and try not to bother you. wait until the day it arises to deal with it and just enjoy your preagnancy... InLAWS to me are all the same LMAO wether brothers, sister, mother or father HAHAHA Best Wishes and Best of Luck!
MelissaJoanne
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
It's not out of order to have strong feeling about whom you would and wouldn't trust with your children. I, as well as most pregnant women I'd wager, have already begun making a mental list of people I'll let watch my child, and people I wouldn't trust. Certainly someone that has issues with her own children is not someone that I would let watch mine! I don't think that you need to make an issue of it at this point though. When someone that I'd rather not watch my child tells me that they plan to babysit for me I smile and nod, knowing that it will never happen. Just don't ever let the opportunity for her to watch your child arise, and it will never be an issue.
brandi j.
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
Sometimes, you just have to learn to say no!! Sit down w/ your bf and tell him how you feel! If he wants to watch his sisters children then that is up to him, but you have to take care of yourself and your baby! I'm not saying to put a guilt trip over on him, but I do think that you should point out that if you do not take care of yourself then you are risking your baby's life, I don't think that is what he would want! Take care and remember that you can say no, even if it causes some hurt feelings, you owe it to your baby!
stephandisaac
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
Try to relax about things for your babys sake. He can feel your stress too. She really shouldn't be asking you to babysit all the time. Stand your ground with your boyfriend too. Tell them it's time for you to relax and take care of YOU. You'll be plenty busy enough after the baby gets here :)
slg3233
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
No girl, you aren't doing anything wrong. I understand exactly how you feel. You keep on keeping on the way you are. Everything will work out!
ashleyandcaleb
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
monica9 is right on.I know it'll get better for you,just keep your head up*good luck*
agonzales
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
Im glad my sister-n-laws arent like that. I think if I were in your situation I would put my foot down especially since you are suppose to be on bedrest. Your baby and you come first before her needing a damn babysitter. She has gone too far having you babysit for 4-5 days a week. Just stand your ground and stick up for yourself. I wouldnt let her babysit either and you should talk to you bf about it and ask why he doesnt stick up for you. Its always gonna be problems living with inlaws so maybe yall should try working on getting yalls own place. Good luck and I hope everything turns out fine for you.
Mommyof2boys
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
Its always hard putting up with boyfriend/husband family because they will expect you to do more than what you should. The only thing I would do is try to ignore her so you don't get upset and try to talk to her and tell her this is how its going to be, if she can't respect that then tell her to go elsewhere. And try explaining to your boyfriend how bad she is making you guys relationship and he'll soon see where the problem lies and its not you. good luck!
RandiLee
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
I agree with Monica9...
And I'd like to add.....i hate in-laws! lol
I wish Dr.Phil made house calls. haha :)
professorpreggers
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
In laws are really difficult to deal with, especially if you don't have your partner rooting for you. You need to stop sitting for her, especially if you are having a difficult pregnancy. It's hard, but you need to set up some boundaries between you and her. First though, you need to get your boyfriend on board with you. If he's not supporting you in this and its getting between you and the SIL then nothing is going to be gained. He needs to understand where you are coming from and support you when you tell his sister no. Once you establish some boundaries, you'll also be able to set limits for how much of a role she plays in your baby's life. She is being overbearing and she is manipulating you in the babysitting demands and you are the only one to be able to put limits on this. Like I said, you need your boyfriend to support you so that when she calls him up to complain about you, he gives his sister the same answer you gave her. You deserved to celebrate your birthday rather than babysitting like you did. This communication and support between you and your boyfriend is REALLY important--you need to learn this kind of communication and support for one another. It's a lesson guys have a hard time learning with the women in their family, but you have to help him if you ever want to draw boundaries for you and your baby. You're really young, but it's never to early to work on this. Don't wait till you and the SIL are fighting over the baby.
monica9
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
You arent out of line. she is taking advantage of you and believe me, she says she wants to be with your little one, until it becomes inconvenient to her or she gets bored of it. just let her be with your baby when you are around and when she asks to babysit your baby just make an excuse up. your husband will have nothing bad he can say then. As for watching her children all the time, just say NO if you are supposed to be on bedrest.
LilMrsK
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
It's sure nice to know that I am not the only one with a crazy sister in law! It can be so very frustrating at times and all I can offer is a listening ear. I don't think you were out of order and I really hope that someday your boyfriend will side with you and your sister in law will be kinder to you. *gentle hugs dear*
uhmanduh
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64 days ago Rating:
0 (0 votes)
me and my hubbys sis didnt get along because she use to live with us and her a bf were i swear slobs. they were only paying 250 a piece for everything(rent, food, utilities) we agreed on that because they dont make as much as we do...but they were always spending money and buying expensive stuff. while me and my husband were supporting them, i told them when the summer comes everything is gonna be split 4 ways they got mad and said bad things about me then once they found out i was pregnant she seemed to got over it and now were cool. but i hated living with her, but it was his sister. i know my story isnt the same but i know how u feel.