Questions and answers

Compare this section with Yahoo Answers and Google Answers. Questions are all related to becoming pregnant, pregnancy, birth and babies.
Go to the Questions and answers index

5 yr old daughter being Sexual???!?!??!?!
Added: 916 days ago.
Added by: Liquidxx
Section: General.
Status: This question is Closed. (Questions will be closed after 10 days.)


OMG what the hell do I do??!?!?!? Today my 5 yr old came to me and told me she was gonna nap with her big fluffy lamb teddy bear thing..and I was like ok whatever...10 Min later things were super quiet so i went to check on her to see if she had fallen asleep..and to my suprise my daughter is under her blanket humping her bear!!!! I waited for a BIT TO SEE IF MY EYES WERE DECEIVING ME and nope!!! she was indeed rubbing it and humping it.. She`s caught my fiance and I once.. but that`s it..other than that i refrain from letting her watch stuff like that on tv and everything.. what do i do? I`m so confused right now.

---

dawnispregz - 914 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) it seems as though as its very natural and common for this to happen - id never heard of it, but im a first time mum and i guess its gonna be my time to freak out at some point, the only thing that i can contribute to this is. youre only freaked out beacuse you know what 'humping' actually entails as an adult, but of course your daughter doesnt at all. its two completely different perceptions of it. if you begin to get your head around the fact that she has no idea what the physical act of sex is then you can begin to relax about it and begin to deter her from doing it and get her to pacify herself in another way. you'll do great, and dont fret about it at all. all the women on here say its normal and thank god for that sweetie. - Cos now i know it is i know ill be cooler about it when Joseph starts pulling his pee-pee at every opportunity!

allybell - 914 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) i know you're a little freaked out by the 'teddy humping', but remember that the child doesn't really know what she's doing at 5 years old. All she knows is that for some reason it is soothing to her when the area is rubbed. My niece started rubbing her 'area' when she was only a few months old as a way to soothe herself when she was crying and my sister totally freaked out, took her to the doctor and the doctor explained that it's not harmful at this point. He said to wait until she as old enough to understand 'no' and being detering her from doing it. He said to never make her feel ashamed or embarrassed about what she was doing, but just to get her to soothe herself in other ways. That's my advise. I hope things work out for you. I have twin girls that were just born in July, so who knows what I have in store with them! My son, luckily, doesn't mess with his 'junk' too much. Good luck.

Liquidxx - 915 days ago WOah!! that's crazy sweety! I'm sure They probably clueless on "how" it actually worked lol.

1girl1boy - 915 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) blondiex I totally agree! I'm going to do my best to educate my daughter on this subjucet at a young age, but appropritly (sp?) ...Sweety thats freaking crazy! Is that possible? I mean really!!! chrissy I agree that's why after this baby I won't be working anymore, money will be super tight but well worth it I think! IMO an in my situation.

chrissy-511 - 915 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) sweety-that's crazy! Just another reason why i really don't want my son to have to be put in day care one day...

sweety198622 - 915 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) My husbands one work friends mil was a daycare teacher and 2 of the children went missing and the found them in the bathroom,doing the deed(i didnt think it could be possible:-0).They were 4 years old!!!

LoveChild - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) It's normal unless the child is obsessed and doing it allllllllll the time. You should definitly have a talk with her though to let her know this is ok in private and that she's the only one able to do this.

hannahe - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) oh blondiex2 my son just turned 3 and he is obsessed with boobs! it is crazy! i swear just yesterday he comes up to me and was like "i have little chee-chees and you have big chee-chees and sissy has little chee-chees." all i did was laugh but if my daughter had said to my husband, "you have a big weenie and benny has a little weenie" i would freak out!

hannahe - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) haha my friend has the same problem with her 2, now 3 year old daughter. she finds that she always does it when she is tired, i guess its relaxing. it is really funny but totally embarassing to her mom. i am pretty sure it is normal, just explain to her that it is inappropriate to do it in public, or whatever your views are. she is little and all she knows is that it feels good. i highly doubt she has any concept of sex so its just a natural exploratory phase.

blondiex2 - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Lol, 1girl1boy, its funny how we handle boys doing sexual things better than girls. Parents freak if a little girl says something about 'down there' in front of people and tell her to be a lady, but I've seen 4 year old boys pull down their pants in front of little girls (purposely to show off their boy parts), or talk about the babysitters big boobies, and we just laugh it off and say 'hes such a boy'. Well, I'm having a boy, I guess I better prepare for that one day ill be looking out the window and seeing my son naked chasing a little girl lol

1girl1boy - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) I actually saw this same exact thing on Oprah, or Dr. Phill. The 5 year old was not only using her pillow but also squeezing her legs together by crossing them as hard as she could, I guess her face would turn red and her heart rate would elivate (says the mom) as blondie said it's all normal!!!! I was so shoched! All I could think was great!!! I thought I had like 14 years before this started happening. Guess not. I'm really glad I saw that show, because I have a feeling I would have thought that some family friend or SOMEONE "got to her" Now I know. I even told my DH about it I wish he would have seen the show, because now at 16 months my daughter touches down there at diaper changes, but I really think she just thinks she's helping me. If I give her a wipe she wipes herself. When my DH saw it he kinda freaked and told her NO in a stern voice. I told him not to do that and explained why. I have a feeling this will be hard for him to handle if he sees his "baby" "masturbating" at such a young age (5 or so) OH I'm glad to have a boy this time around, lol

blondiex2 - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Blondie is right, its normal. Plus, its literally impossible to keep them totally unexposed. When I was little I was 'ahead' in reading and writing but very, very quiet - I saw a couple having sex in a public place, a pool, and pretty much knew what it was without saying anything to my parents. Then my cousin and I used to pretend we had boyfriends, probably starting at like 6, and sometimes 'play' doing stuff. Neither of us were abused, neither exposed to too much 'adult' stuff, but I mean kids see all kinds of little stuff and sometimes just learn it on their own and become curious. My dad just ended up giving me the big talk at 6 instead of ignoring the fact that I knew what sex was already, and after the talk gave me girl books about my body, sex, etc. And he did the right thing in my opinion. I don't know if id necessarily point out that you saw HER doing it, might embarrass her, maybe just talk to her about how its normal and ok to do it? I think that may be better but its up to you! :)

Liquidxx - 916 days ago MrsHilde75: So it's normal I'm taking it.. But your right just because It's normal, doesn't change the fact that it is indeed uncomfortable to watch especially cause that's my little baby *sigh*

MrsHilde75 - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) UGGH! I know exactly how you feel! My husband and I have had legal custody of my 2nd cousin since she was 2 (she's now 4, and she knows us as Mommy & Daddy). Anyway, I first caught her doing this when she was nearly 3, to her pillow. It makes me very uncomfortable. Right away, I worry what she may have seen before we got her. She still does from time to time. And she complains sometimes that her "privates" are sore & I tell her that's why. I hate it because I don't want other people to wonder what's going on if she complains her privates are sore. I asked her Dr. about it in December. She told me it's completely normal and not to discourage her. She said to tell her to do it in her room, if she does it in the open, which she doesn't. It's always in her room, with her pillow. The Dr. also told me it's not sexual, and that to children of that age, it's just same satisfying feeling as adults get when we give hugs?!?@?!@? Huh? I don't agree with that one bit. Regardless, I try not to make a big deal about it but it really makes me very uncomfortable!

Liquidxx - 916 days ago blondie: Thanks for that. It sounds reasonable. Just freaking out or WAS freaking out. My first 5yr old, I'm NO pro.

xolblondieox - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) This has NOTHING to do with what she has seen/heard. Occasionally, children that have been exposed to sex, via molestation, will imitate, but to ease your mind, this is NOT what's going on. This is a perfectly normal stage of development. Children will start as young as 6 months old with masturbating. Boys will pull at their penises and girls will play with their clitorises as INFANTS, because it feels good and it's an instinctual thing to do. It does NOT make them over-sexed, mean that they've been abused, nor is it weird or rare in ANY way. This is part of development. Many children will hump or push up against anything inbetween thier legs. For instance, in a stroller or in a highchair...anywhere where there is a solid piece between their legs. Some will do this until they are near puberty. It is self gratifying and totally normal. You can ask any doctor. People of whom I've known that have children that do this (which is quite a few, because it's COMMON), have all been told by their doctors to keep an eye on, but ignore the behavior. She does NOT have to explain it to you, and you do NOT want to tell her to stop. You may want to tell her to not do it in public, but showing it attention, especially negative, will only prolong it. Sometimes children will get raw down there from doing this so often, so watch for that and don't mistake it for abuse. You can discuss it with her, but do not harp on it and do not make her feel ashamed. I know it's strange to watch as an adult, but remember that she is a child, this is normal and she is learning about her body.

Liquidxx - 916 days ago Also Thanks Lisa and Jenny.

Liquidxx - 916 days ago and Julianna: I Rock/humo (i guess thats what it looks like) myself to sleep.. done it forever now lol but she was not going to sleep. That's the thing =(

Liquidxx - 916 days ago Hopin4a13ay13ee: She does go with her dad and his wife for like 3 days out of the week. She really is vocal about what goes on over there. She's never said anything to me. *sighs* I hope nothing like that is going on over there.. I have Asked her and she just tells me I don't know mom, I don't know the answer.. I feel like a failure for some reason..

Julianna - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Yep, I'd ask her about it. I have a great nephew who is not even 2 years old who does this same type of thing. For some it can be their "comfort" before going to sleep, just like some take a pacifier or need a blankie.

Hopin4a13ay13ee - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Just asking....but have you left your daughter with anyone without you? Is there a possible chance that she has been touched? or even seen you and ur fiance or someone else doing it more then the one time and you just didnt know about it? She should not understand what she is doing at 5 years old. try to talk to her about her stuffed friend and ask her where she learnt to do that at. explain to her that she will not be in trouble but it is important you know. a friend of mines little girl did this at 5 and it was because the babysitter would touch her and then bring guys over and have sex with them while the little girl watched...i hope and pray this is not the case...i hope u figure out whats goin on soon.

lisab123 - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) I have no idea. Kids are so curious. That is a hard one. I wish you the best luck. Let us know how it goes. Although it is not your fault!!!!!

jennymomof3 - 916 days ago Rating: 0 (0 votes) Ok panicky I know! But I would talk to her about it calmly and see how she explains it and ask if she has any questions. Don't go into details with her but maybe she picked it up from another kid or she's seen something. Let her know what is appropriate and not and talk to her about someone touching her. Explain to her its only for using the bathroom. I hope I helped it really is hard not to panic and over react.