Quiver Full -
46 days ago.
My name is Teresia. iam a birth and bereavement doula and childbirth educator. i wanted to let everyone here know about a great resource: stillbirthday.com if you have experienced a pregnancy loss it is a wonderful place to get answers and it can also be a place for you to help other moms experiencing loss. they are starting a new mentoring program if you are interested in being mentored or being a mentor. please visit the site and tell me what you think! i pray it is a source of comfort to you!
frommo2mommi -
82 days ago.
So I thought that maybe dealing with things by myself would be the best way for me to cope with my loss, but after becoming curious about this forum and reading the post of the women who have been through similar situations, i feel it is best to also share my story and in turn help someone else the way that alot of you helped me... start to really heal. Sunday Oct 23 2011 - I had a very early baby shower, only at 20 weeks and 1 day for my baby boy. My parents were in town from out of the Country and were about to leave the following week. We had a great time and celebrated and enjoyed everyones happiness to add another life to our family. That evening my throat started to get really sore, almost instantly. My 8 month old had a cold the previous week so i figured that this was my turn to get sick. Then following morning (MONDAY) I woke up and felt like I might have strep throat. I decided it was a good opportunity to not only take my daughter to urgent care but also myself to see how sick we really were. She had a Sinus infection and I was tested for Strep, but nothing, just a viral infection. Well, That evening (MONDAY NIGHT)... my water broke while my DH and I were having intercourse. Initially, when your water breaks it is an exciting moment, but a half a second after that feeling hit me, i was overwhelmed with a feeling of intense fear. IT WAS WAY TOO EARLY!!! Only 20 weeks and 2 days, my little boy was not ready to come into this world. I went into L&D about an hour after my water COMPLETE broke and had an ultrasound. There was barely any fluid left around my baby, but his heartbeat was strong and he was still moving. I was told by my midwife that the chances of my son surviving if he was born right now was NOT likely, because as you know a baby has to be at least 24 weeks to have lungs developed enough to work with assistance. They said either my body would naturally start the labor process (which I had absolutely no contractions or pain), or I would be on bed rest until I reached 24 weeks and they would give my baby steriod shots to help his lungs get stronger... or my body would develop an infection which could be fatal to me... and if that was the case, they would have to induce labor to get the baby out immediately. I went that night, the following day and the next morning with no problems. The first thing they did (Wednesday) morning was do an ultrasound to see how the baby was doing. I had been drinking as much water as possible to try to get the baby to create more amniotic fluid. I started feeling very light cramps, but felt fine. The ultrasound showed to have a little bit more fluid, regular heartbeat and some movement. About an hour later, i developed a fever of 103. That is when the doctors came in and said that I have developed an infection and they will need to induce my labor. As most of you know, that is when my world came crumbling down. I felt so helpless, i felt that they were not giving my baby boy a chance to show this world what he has to offer. I had so many questions, why, what is going on? Why me??? Why no antibiotics to fight off the infection? 11am they gave me the first dose of medicine to start labor. They told me they will give it to me ever 4 hours and after the second dose, it should really kick start the contractions and labor. Not even 20 minutes after they gave me the medication, i felt this pop inside me, and felt as if something sort of came out. About 12:15 the doctor came in to see how i was doing, I asked for an epidural because the pain was becoming very intense. She checked me out to see how far i progressed and when she stuck her hand in... she said she felt an arm or a leg and it was time to push. 12:25pm, October 26th 2011... My son was born, Stillborn. I had no idea what he would be named before hand because i figured i would have another 5 months to name him... but after he was born, i was inspired to name my son Angelo, my angel. He was 10 3/4 inches long, 13oz. He was so small, but looked identical to his daddy. Had his same eyebrows, and face... even had his same hands. His poor little body was bruised due to the trauma of traveling down the birth canal at such an early age. But he looked so peaceful. My initial reaction was that I did not want to see him when he was born because i felt i might be too traumatized. But the second he was born, i wanted nothing but to be with him, hold him and kiss him. And that I did. I wrapped him up in his blankets and held him the entire day, and had him stay with me overnight. My dear baby, too soon was his life cut short, but yes... he did fulfill his purpose in God's eyes. He made me a stronger woman and better mother for my now 9 month old. After having testing done on the placenta, the cause for infection was the STREP VIRUS IN THE PLACENTA!!! How does that even happen??? I still ask myself what I did wrong, or what i could have done differently... but at the same time, i would only truly be happy if my children lived healthy long lives, and if this baby would have suffered from this infection, I would have a broken heart for the rest of my life. Things happen for a reason, and i am just happy to know the cause. We had our son cremated, so he will never be out of sight, out of mind in some grave somewhere, cold and alone... we kiss him everyday, and not a day goes by that i dont think about how much i love him, and miss him and wish he was still inside my belly. I feel his little ghost kicks here and there, but sadly realize he isnt there. I still have tons of pain, but feel that I am ok with holding in all of this overwhelming emotion, but would love to share and even help other mothers who have lost babies after knowing the gender and such. I know i have written so much now, so i will end this. If anyone needs me, i will be here. We plan on trying again in the future, but this time... we will be on guard and i will be considered high risk. Hope your hearts heal in time... they are our angels keeping an eye on us from Heaven. RIP Angelo James... we will always love you!!! -Monica
missy1988 -
422 days ago.
I just suffered losing my baby at 15 weeks 5 days. I created a page on facebook to get bring awarness and support to what I'm trying to do. I'm making beautiful matching bracelets for demise babies and their mothers. I'll be donating these to the local hospitals but am willing to donate them to anyone who has lost a baby or babies before - just asking for a small donation in return since this is all coming out of my pocket.
http://www.facebook.com/Until.We.Meet.Again.Bracelets
I hope to bring some comfort to ladies during a hard time that I've experienced twice.
much love.
xo
sking -
441 days ago.
Hey ladies I too lost my precious baby. I started spotting light brown on Monday. I called my Dr and they said that it could be normal and as long as it didnt get worse to come in next week for my appt. So Tuesday came and it was still the same but then that night it started to turn red and got heavier. So my Dr told me to go to the ER. Long story short I had a vaginal U/S and it didnt show anything. I had to us the bathroom after the U/S and I felt something come out and I wiped and it was the baby. You could see everything, the placenta, the sac, and the baby inside. I couldnt see the baby clearly but I could tell what it was. So that is where the true heartache began. I was 7weeks 4days when I lost our little angel. I went to the Dr yesterday to talk to them about everything and to have my levels checked again. They decided to wait till next Monday to check my levels but she did talk to me about my levels the night of the miscarriage. They were 2200 and that is right around a 3 to 5 week pregnancy so she said it looks like the baby died 2 weeks ago. So I guess a week after I took the test and found out I was pregnant the baby died. But we will try again and I know that this is Gods way of saying that something was wrong with the baby. God and my Faith in him is the only thing that is getting us through this. God Bless each and every one of you.
sjudd -
521 days ago.
So sorry to hear about all your losses ladies. I know what it feels like to lose my baby, and it hurts and its hard to let go. JULIE-my doc told us to wait a couple of cycles..we started right away though. Even though i started right away it was about 3 or 4 normal cycles til i got pregnant again so i guess he was right about waiting but its whatever you feel your body can handle.
Suddenlyalone -
525 days ago.
There needs to be a form for mothers or pregnant woman where the father of the baby or children has passed on. I need someone who has gone through this or is going through this. I’m 17w pregnant with a 6year old and my love has died a 1.5 weeks ago.
erubio77 -
537 days ago.
I to has just loss my baby i was 9 weeks . I want to the dr. cause i was spotting pink and brown for about four days. I want to the appt. to find that my baby hasn't grown in 3 weeks and the was not heart beat. The pain was unbelievable. We wanted the baby so badly I had just took out my IUD in May. I got prago in late june , I never thought it could be my IUD and I still don't know if My IUD could of caused something to go wrong. Any how i wish you girls the best . Im not sure when we will try again cause as of now Im to hurt too.
mross615 -
564 days ago.
ladies visit misdiagnosedmiscarriage.com!! before you decide on a d&c this could save many lives
jmpugh -
593 days ago.
I'VE BEEN PREGNANT THREE TIMES AND I LOST TWO IN MY FIFTH MONTH AND THE THIRD PREGNANCY IN MY SIXTH MONTH. THE LAST LOSS I HAD WAS AUGUST 2,2008. I CURRENTLY HAVE NO CHILDREN AND I AM NOT PREGNANT. I AM READY TO TRY AGAIN ALTHOUGH I WILL HAVE TO GET MY CERVIX STITCHED AT 12 WEEKS. MY PREGNANCIES HAVE ALL TURNED OUT HORRIBLE BUT I AM PRAYING FOR A GREAT OUT COME WHEN I GET PREGNANT
babygal27 -
704 days ago.
has anyone else on here had a miscarriage that they think may be related to mirena? i just had a miscarriage last week (ugh...) and i have a sinking feeling it has to do with the mirena that i had used for a little over a year. i waited until i had my period after the removal before we started trying and now i had a miscarriage at 5.5 weeks. i have one healthy boy that we had no trouble conceiving after being on the pill. just curious if anyone else had this problem?
aquariusmomma -
806 days ago.
I was 12 weeks,waiting for my appointment with my doctor at 14 weeks to get an ultrasound,i had previously had one at 7w and 5 days,at 12 weeks i started to bleed and went into the hospital,and found out i had m/c this is prob the hardest thing i have ever been through.i have a blood clot disorder called factor V leidon,and ever since i became pregnant i have been on medication doing all i could to prevent this from happening.we wanted this baby so bad and everything hurts.I also found out recently that i have a tilted uterus so i will never know if i will have this chance again,if anyone is going through this,just know you are not alone =(
newmommyagain -
812 days ago.
I am so sorry for your loss. : ( You can never help getting the feeling of joy and love when you find out you are pregnant, and that is what is so disappointing when it all has to end too soon. Your story reminded me of what happened when I found out I was preg after ttc for a long time. I walked around waiting for the m/c to occur 3 weeks and felt like it was all so cruel. You are not a failure. These things just happen. Sometimes more often than we realize. I will pray for you to have strength to get thru this. God bless.
stargazer530 -
814 days ago.
I found out I was pregnant last Monday. The day before my wedding anniversary. Since I don' have ins and am staying home with my 9 mo old, this news was a shock and hubby and I were worrying about finances. But we were super excited and eager to have another baby. I went for an US yesterday because I had had some spotting and light cramps and didn't know how far along I was. Down deep I knew what the tech was going to say. My first pregnancy was a miscarriage as well, and as I did then, this time I knew something was wrong. The first thing the tech said was 'there's no baby'. All I could do was lay there and cry quietly while she proceeded to make sure I didn't have an ectopic. My doctor's office called this morning to tell me it was too early to know anything, but they were wrong and already too late. I woke up to bleeding and cramps.
The cramps have gotten very bad and the bleeding has increased. I just feel like a failure and feel so empty. I hate my body for telling me something was going on and letting me think I was going to have a baby, I hate that I took a stupid test and it said positive (or rather that all 4 said positive) and I hate that I let myself get my hopes up and get so excited when I knew something was wrong. It's bad enough to have a miscarriage at all, but I just wish it could be over with when you find out. It shouldn't have to hurt and hurt and hurt and last for days. I guess I should be thankful it's happening so soon. With my first my pregnancy symptoms continued for weeks and it took over a month after I found out it was a miscarriage before my body would finally let go of it.
I just wish it could be over and I could forget about it.
one day -
841 days ago.
Hello my strong mommies! I am not new to this forum and yet I thought I wouldn't have to come back here again... Monday I woke up to some spotting and cramping. I knew exactly what was happening. I went to my dr hospital to find out I was having contractions (4min apart) and my cervix was opening... Dejavu for me allll over again. I thought I was in the clear! I was measuring 17weeks and sooo excited feeling all the movements of my baby girl and now I'm empty. One blink of the eye and my entire life crashes down on me! At least the hosp this time was fantastic! So sincere... I got to hold her as long as I wanted and touched her tiny yet long fingers ontop of mine. The cutest lil nose and feet I never wanted to let her go, but I knew she wasn't just sleeing... It was just weeks too soon... I'm torn w a million questions and tired of the people that surround me! I haven't gone bk to work yet and I don't want to! I just want to crawl up in a corner and just die. My dr told me NEXT time she's going to have me on bedrest and a cerclage at 10weeks if necesarry! Well why didn't u??? Why bc at 14weeks my cervix was good? Yea well that cld change in a days notice!! Two weeks later oh cervix is now open! And pretty much too late bc I'm in labor now! Meanwhile ...uh I'm not even goin to go there! Sorry I just had to realease a long awaited vent! If I had my computer I'm sure I wld have rampled on but this is thru my cell and a bit annoying!
Ladies should I even try to get pregnant after this one? Could my heart go through another mc? Isn't 4 enough??? I just want my babies w me... I'm so lost right now.
katiemummy -
844 days ago.
Well I just wanted to say that I found all your comments very comforting. I went for my 12 wk scan today and the baby had no hearbeat (looks like I miscarried at 6-7 weeks but no symptoms). I am scheduled for a d&c tomorrow. I started spotting just last night and to be honest, something had not quite 'felt' right. I have a 15 month old daughter and this pregnancy felt different. It is a very sad time, but my husband and I are keen to try again after my next period.
It is a painful experience, but I'm comforted by the fact that there was probably something wrong with the baby so this is natures way of making that awful decision for us....
LGK616 -
858 days ago.
I wrote a blog called Wave of Light - it is dedicated to everyone who has suffered a loss. I've met and known so many women who have suffered the loss of a baby. Whether it be in the early weeks, the 2nd trimester or even full term. And I won't say that I can feel their pain because I can't. I don't understand the loss they feel or how it feels to have your heart shattered. But I can sympathize with them, be a friend, lend a shoulder to cry on and just be there when they ask 'why'.
I hope you all know, if you don't already, that October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Rememberance day. You are asked to light a candle at 7pm, wherever you are in the world and remember those pregnancy's and baby's that were lost, whether they were yours or someone you know. Or you can light a virtual candle at http://gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?l=eng.
Show your support and light a candle and help promote October 15th worldwide.
I will light a candle for my dear friends who have suffered a loss. May you never know the pain again.
xox
CarminaK -
899 days ago.
Hi everyone! I am sorry if you are reading this which means you are probably here for a reason. I've felt a lot of comfort come from some of the forums on here, all of the ladies have been really nice. Four weeks ago today on August 4th, my little baby girl was born. Macie Isabelle Keyser. She weighed 6lbs and 7 ounces and was 19 inches long. She had passed away only the day before and was born a sleeping angel. She seemed to have a velamentous cord insertion from what they could tell. Her cord was inserted into the amniotic sac and not the placenta like it normally should be. This makes it unstable and easier for the cord to be pulled away from the sac which is what happened. I will get more details when I return to the doctor. Its all so overwhelming because I was 39 weeks and 3 days. She was full term and completely healthy in every way. I know God has a plan and that he obviously made her too perfect for this world, but I can't help question why things happen the way they do sometimes. I feel for every single one of you. If any of you need to talk or email, please send me a message. I need people just as much right now and talking to others who know my pain seems to help a lot right now. Thanks everyone who listens!
roosa -
899 days ago.
julie, you will probably find many different opinions. I think it is a personal choice. Definitely wait at least one cycle, but other than that I think it is up to you when you are ready. Some try right away (we did) and others take a break. All the best. xox
juliej9708 -
899 days ago.
please can anyone share that has had a miscarriage when you started to try again ??I know doc says wait a few cycles but ther are some women on here who started with success very soon after.I would rather here real stories from people rather that be told 'the best thing to do'
KylaRaquel -
903 days ago.
I was just wondering if it is possible to lose a pregnancy with NO blood whatsoever??? Is that possible? I've just been so worried about having another miscarriage after having 3 miscarriages in the past- it's hard for me to keep believing that this one is just going so well. Uggh!
Laura Rendon -
973 days ago.
I had a D & C performed in January, we only had a sac at 6 weeks but no yolk sac or stem. I went to get an ultrasound this afternoon for my new pregnancy and the tech said that it seemed like I was about 5 weeks and that she could see the sac and they yolk sac but she didn't mention a stem, could it be possible that it is too early? help anyone, I don't want this too be another loss. I'm praying to God and keeping my faith but I can't help but feel scared.
Manda22 -
973 days ago.
GIBSON, Im so sorry to ready your post!!! I was 10 weeks when I had an ultrasound and found out the baby had no heartbeat.I had NO sings or symptoms of any trouble. They called it a missed Missacrrage. I had decided to help the M/C along too with medication the 4 pills vaginaly every 6 hours and when the heavy bleeding started 2 pills oraly till the bleeding stopped. I was like you wanted to avoid the D&C if possible. I thought the D&C would be too hard on me and too invasive. WELL I took the pills and started bleeding right away 8pm...by 2 am I felt like i was in Labour..i guess i was i was having contractions back pain cramps...it was awful I cried and curled up in my bed while my DH was rubbing my back with every contraction...finally a few hours later the baby passed and alot of blood and tissue. I continued having cramping and bleeding for days..i went for another ultrasound 1 week later and there was still tissue in the uterus that had to pass..so i keep taking the pills for 4 more day and still the placenta was in theuterus..my doctore asked me to either keep taking the pills, or I could have the D&C..I went for the D&C the following day and If I had know then how easy qiuck and painless and NON termatic (sp?) it would be. I would have had it for the very begining. I know everyone is different and sometimes the natural way or medicated way does work, byt just know that you will feel everything happening and know what is happening and see the result as it happens...I will never forget this terribel experience and I wish the pain and images and sounds were not in my brain. Just wanted to let you know. Cause Noone told me any of this before. Good Luck and my hear aches for you!!!! ~hugs~
gibsongirl -
973 days ago.
Went in for an ultrasound yesterday, as a follow up to one I had 2 weeks prior. It was confirmed the baby was gone. I would have been about 8 or 9 weeks now, and it looks as though the baby was lost somewhere in the 5 or 6th week. The doctor said it looks as though my body was absorbing everything and preparing to miscarry. I'm choosing not to do a D&C for now.. To me a D&C would be far to traumatizing to me. I would rather miscarry naturally... For me I think its a better way to work through all of this. I go back monday to check and see if my body is preparing and maybe help it along. I'm hoping (as weird as that sounds) to start the process this weekend. I'm having a little bit of cramping and back pain.. but nothing bad.. I hope for all you ladies who have or are miscarrying you feel better soon, and that it won't be long before you have a healthy pregnancy and baby.
crystalgee -
974 days ago.
With sadness in my heart, I lost my baby 3 days ago... it took some time for me to come back online as it was so painful for me and my family. was supposed to be on 12 weeks but when I went for my u/s, my baby measured at only 6 wks and doesn't have a heartbeat :( My OB then told me that I have to undergo d&c which I have to oblige because I was already having some spotting and cramps. I may feel so sad, upset and disappointed but I am holding on to my faith that this is all in God's hands... and I lift my baby up to HIM... I am still blessed with two healthy children and 2 beautiful angels who are now watching over us. I am thankful to each and everyone who shared in this forum as it made it easier for me to get through this difficult moment knowing that I am not alone and there is always hope in the future...
newmommyagain -
991 days ago.
Thanks for posting the great poem, Mom2MaddoxandBaby2. I especially liked the part that said not to think God sent the baby to you and then changed his mind. I don't think God wants to do things like that. I think its the nature of our human bodies.