22-7-2009 - Y does she always do this 2 me????

My mood while writing this blog: So HURT.......

Its long...sorry...but please read. My mom has 2 find something wrong with all my boyfriends. Well she cant find anything wrong with this one and its killin her. Now that im preg she want to try to take over everything (baby name, relationship ect...) She wanted the name 2 be Jasmine Kristina, and we were thinking about Jasmine but we changed it to Angel. He wanted the middle name to be his mom's middle name which is Lavette. At 1st I wasnt sure how I felt about it cause its not a name u hear often...I never said I didnt like it or want it. I called my mom and told her we changed the name to Angel and she said y, I thought it was gonna be Jasmine? I said I like Angel better. So she said what about the middle name. I said he wants to use his mom's middle name. So she says what is it....I said Lavette. The 1st thing that comes out her mouth is "NO, NO, UN-UH, NO! I dont like that!" Then she askes me how I felt about it. I told her I wasnt sure i'll prob just have to get used to it. ..she says" just tell him u dont like it and u dont want that name" (mind u i never said that) "is it fair that he uses his moms name and not urs?"...So i got off the phone with he and called my friend. I told her the name and same thing I told my mom. then she said the name back to me (first and middle). i sat there 4 a moment and said it doesnt sound bad now that u said it to me...i kinda like it. The names sound good together. So I decided then that i would like to keep the name like that. I told him what she said about the name and he got mad of course. So yesterday he told my mom how he felt about the whole situation (no cursing or yelling) and she got a attitude and tried to make a scene on the phone tellin him he disrespecting her (cursin and yellin) at me and him, an he says what have i done thats so wrong.. all she can say is what have u done right. And then got my dad thinkin he disrespecting her so he gets on the phone with an attitude. AFter.. he calls his mom cause he is super upset (an i completly understand y) so his mom gets my moms number to call her. They talk and she calls us back. She says that my mom told her the whole name thing was my idea, that i came to her an i said i didnt like the name. So she basically lied POINT BLANK! Oh and told her that I left my daughter with them and dissapeared for 6 months...WTF! They took custody of her when i got locked up (for something stupid)...So how did i leave her? So now he thinks I lied to him and he said he is leaving me... I didnt lie to him about anything, i swear! Im trying to tell him my mom is going to try to do everything she can to get ihim to leave so she can have things her way, but he doesnt seem to understand that. I cried so much last night from being hurt (that he believes her) and from being angry (that she lied on me). That is my heart and I dont know what i'll do if he leaves... Im sure i'll just shut down. I already feel like im starting to. I havent eaten since yesterday afternoon didnt hardly get any sleep...I cant take this. It just hurts more than anything that HE DOESNT BELIEVE ME.... If she cant have her way she has to make my life miserable...why??????