01-8-2008 - where I'm at

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

I'm 19 weeks today and still not sure that I am feeling the baby move. I thought I was for a while but nothing for a few days and I'm really not sure that what I was feeling WAS the baby... I have a doppler and I listened for the heartbeat just to check in yesterday and it was 152 so thats great but I wanna feel it.

Also 19 weeks today!!!! I'm really excited about this I can't believe the 1/2 way point is so close! My parents will be in town to visit with us later this month. I haven't seen my mom since EASTER (before I was pregnant)!! She and I are going maternity clothes shopping and to BabiesRus to look around. I feel bad that she feels so disconnected but she is hours away and even though we talk on the phone all the time its not the same. I miss her.

My birthday is next weekend and I've been feeling a little bummed. I'm turning 30 and I really don't care about that BUT I feel like I am missing out on some big 30th birthday bash and this summer has been really hard for me. I'm uncomfortable in my changing body and too hot in the sun. I hate the smell of the bbq, I miss my bikini and lounging at the lake all day with my husband, the neighbors and a cold drink. Plus I am working 3-11 PM so I spend all day inside doing house work or running errands then off to work. Summer used to be my favorite but really I'll be happy when it ends this year...