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17-9-2009 - Need to Vent...

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

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Ok, just to start out for those of you that dont want to read this... This has to do with church...

Well, we attend a non-denominational church that I must say is really "hot" right now. We have about 4000 people every Sunday that attend. I volunteer as a greeter twice a month and my husband volunteers on the security team. Now here is the issue that I am frustrated at... I am thrilled that my husband is involved in church and wants to go... I love to go... however, this security thing has gotten to me so much that I am about ready to stop going and I really dont want to do that because I love the church and the pastor. The thing is that we dont go as a family most of the time. My husband goes and volunteers for the first service at 9 am, we (my son and grandparents) attend the 10:20 service, where my husband again volunteers and we have to sit in the very front row, next to the pastor and his wife to protect them, providing that they need it. Ok, this is frustrating because I dont want to sit in the front... It hurts my back, neck and head... but I do it. So, we take two different cars to church on Sunday, I am left to get our son ready for church, who is 15 months old, and pack my husbands grandparents in my car to go to church... EVERY SUNDAY... Well, we are having a special series this month and they have added extra services... So, now instead of one Saturday service, and 3 sunday services, we have two Saturday Services and 4 Sunday Services... So now, my husband wants to volunteer on Saturdays as well... Ok, although my husband is laid off, I work 5 days a week and Saturdays and Sundays are my only days home with my family. So, now my days are cut short on those days... And then, he signed us up for this Fireproof your marriage class every tuesday night from 7-9pm... Ok, I leave for work at 6:30 am and dont get home til 5:30 or 6pm everyday... So, now there is time with my 15 month old that has been cut short, not to mention that I am exhausted! AND it gets better... He wants to go to church on Wednesdays as well... if any of you work, you know how exhausting it is to be pregnant, work, take care of a 15 month old, and still do stuff around the house... But, last night I gave in.. I went to church (I like church) but we never get out within an hour on Wednesday... It was 8:30 when church let out last night. My son was exhausted and fussy, I was extremely exhausted and felt like I walked away from church with nothing because I was more upset that it was so late. So, I went off on my husband. I understand that security is needed to protect the kids... and I understand that with all the crazies the pastor and his family need protecting as well, but come on... how much security does one need! I like to go to church as a family, sit as a family, and not worry about what others are doing. By the time that Joe turned in his ear piece from security last night and we got home, it was after 9. My son didnt want to sleep and that was a fight, I was so tired that I didnt even hear Joe come to bed, and I am an extremely light sleeper. Now, he is mad at me for telling him that I am done with all this security stuff and that I am about ready to stop going to church at all because of it. I love the church, I love Jesus, but this is too much for me right now. And I feel like I am the bad person in all this, which makes it even more frustrating. I dont know... Sorry for venting but I had to get it out. I just cant take much more.

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1 Comments on Need to Vent...


lindseymarie - Thursday, 17 Sep
Aww you poor thing! I would be upset too!! I think you should tell your hubby not to volunteer during 2nd service on sundays so you can sit together where you want. You should not have to go on tuesdays and wednesdays if you don't want to, after all you work all day long and have a baby to take care of! Not to mention being pregnant you have to take care of yourself and you need your sleep. Im sure hubby will understand. its great that he wants to be involved but explain to him that he needs to consider you and your son before he makes all these commitments. Hope everything works out, Good Luck!!