07-11-2008 - 2% Chance....

My mood while writing this blog: broken...

So Oct 7, 2008 we had out first appt, 9wks along heard the heartbeat...and was given a 2%chance of a miscarriage...

Oct 24, 2008 lil bit of bleeding...ahh no big deal...but lets go to the ER to get it checked out and get an ultrasound...I was so excited to see the baby....besides I had a lot of bleeding with my second and everything was fine...We get their and my BF is worried but thinks I was being cautious and no big deal off to the stirrups we go...looks fine but time for an ultrasound...(Yay!!! I was so excited...finally!!) Roll us down....lube me up and...empty....what are you looking at I asked the tech??

Your uterus she replied, So wheres the baby, I say??? She says maybe your not as far as your thought...(tears) Bull sh*t! I have been through this twice I know what I should see...my BF just grabbed my hand and told me to stop looking at the screen...just look at him...everything is going to be fine...

Well it wasnt and Im not but we will be...this was the neverending miscarriage...I have been in the ER the last 3 saturdays...becuz the docs kept tellin me it should be done but last saturday they had me on morphine because it started up again...oh then what looked like my intstines fell out on Sunday...

My bf and I are trying to start healing but its hard...especially when I end up back in the hospital...so as much as enjoyed sharing my journey with you all on the same path my baby has disappeared, I did see it though, on a tissue...that sucked....I gave it to the Dr....I didnt know what else to do...maybe in a few months we will try again.... stay strong ladies & enjoy your blessing...