16-9-2009 - FRUSTRATED (long)

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

This is a vent....which means I'm probably pms'ing right now...please, don't take it personal.

Vent#1

Life is just full of surprises and sometimes the surprise ain't that great! I have noisy, nosey neighbors that crowd my steps all times of the day and night. Sometimes, I just want to throw a bucket of water out there. I'm tired of coming home to have all eyes on me. Now, this is not to say that everyday, is a bad day. Just saying that most of them are. I take my stroller with me everywhere I go. Especially, when I'm not driving. So common sense would say....get off the steps so I can take my stroller down.( common sense isn't for everyone) They take their time. I have hit a few folk with my stroller. I know, I know it sounds ignorant and I don't think of myself as a malicious person. However, saying excuse me for the same thing when YOU don't even live in this building....angers me to the inth degree. Then they look at me like I'm wrong for having my baby in a stroller. I'm sorry, perhaps I should levitate him around town. I have a new neighbor. She has been in the building a month. She stares at me nastily. She also pried open the lock to the security door saying her key didn't work. RING a bell duh...

Vent#2

See, I have children from a previous relationship. Things did not end well, like they do on TV. There was no happily ever after. Just a lying ex. I WILL NOT LET ANYONE HURT MY CHILDREN PERIOD. I don't care who and what you are to them. What I want is for people to understand that everytime a child is promised something, they remember. No matter how long ago it was, no matter how small the item.) As their mom, I try to shield them from as much hurt as I can. I want them to grow up educated, LOVED,well-rounded,responsible,mannerful,well adjusted, productive citizens. I feel that anything that impedes that, has got to go. Yes, I didn't make them by myself,but I'm doing a DAMN EXCELLENT job raising them.

What I really get tired of, is defending/and or explaining to people why I feel the way I do about my situation. I have been told that their father should be allowed to do whatever he wants, because these are his children too. That they will see him for who he really is when they get older. Who knows what kind of damage he could impart by then???? SUCKER PLEASE if that is how you choose to deal with it greattttt, but over here. HELL NOOOOOOO. You either treat them the way they are supposed to be treated all the time or take a long walk off a short bridge. Children are to be cared for all the time. I know there are things that mommies (as fab as we are) can do better than daddy's but, in all honesty that is a crock of bull. Men real men. I challenge you to apply yourselves. Everything that you need in life so do your children. They are growing fast, watching and waiting to tell you when your game is slipping. They aren't going to love you any less, but they are taking notes believe it. My kids tell me all the time.

vent#3

There are a lot of blended families on the website. I too, am part of the blended family/bonus children crew. This is a delicate and tricky road to drive on. Some women may say, this is not what they signed up for.( yeah, you did when you said you loved that man) but, I understand all fronts. I read the posts sometimes and laugh, wanting to spank the child's butt or the mother of the child(ren) as well. I have 3 bonus daughters myself. I love and treat them as if they are my own. I see no reason not too. All I ask in return, is respect and manners. The only thing that I won't do is spank them. Now, don't get me wrong, if you truly have the devil in you, I will pop you. But, just out and out spanking on a child that is not mine can cause a whole bunch of issues, I don't need. Mine....Oh, I spank them! I talk to the bonus daughters sternly and stress manners and no talk back. Now mind you, I understand kids need to express themselves to adults. That is fine! However, there will be no rolling of the eyes, sucking of the teeth, hands on the hip, a tone that is not acceptable to my ears and pointing of the fingers. You are the child. Stay in a child's place. If that is what you are allowed to get away with at home. GREAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTT. Not here. Sometimes dads are on board and sometimes they are not. I feel like my house is ROME and when in ROME, DO AS THE ROMANS DO. Its a work in progress I tell you. Prayers are going up for me. lol

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Soooo,I ask you what is YOUR too much? Everything does not work for everybody. Each family here has a different dynamic, good, bad or indifferent that makes it work. Yes, sometimes we reach out for advice. Not a total judgement or a tongue lashing by way of computer. Try to have a little more compassion and tolerance for your fellow woman. I'm not saying to sugar coat it. However , if you feel like "OMG she's out her damn mind, I wouldn't take that from no man" or"If that was my husband/boyfriend's child coming to my house I would..." You might not want to hit the reply button so fast.