10-4-2009 - drama...I need to say this

My mood while writing this blog: pissed off to all pisstivity and sad

First let me say I apoligize to anyone if it offends you in any way......My baby's father and I are not getting along. Do you know that I am almost 21 weeks and this fool still hasn't told his mother that Im pregnant!?! I mean WTF!!! I feel like he is disowning my child or me. That shit hurts. I don't know what to do. I gotta a half a mind to call his mom and tell her myself yet the other half is telling me to just let it go. I don't know what to do. My feelings are sooo hurt. I feel like shit. I know I have the support of my family and all but that's not how my life is supposed to be. I don't wanna be treated like a statistic. I have a college degree and a great job where I can take care of my son on my own....It's just not the life I had planned for me. I don't want or need a part time dad in my childs life. Only if he knew the love of my life is back around ready to give my son his last name. But because I'm hurt I can't trust that either. I don't know what to do does anyone have any advice for me? I know I should leave it in God's hands but right now I can't. I'm really trying to get it together really I am. Hell I don't know if I'm more sad or upset. Well thanks for listening/reading my thoughts I just really needed to get that off my chest....I hope you all have a blessed day