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04-4-2009 - I give up...

My mood while writing this blog: IDK

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Wow, I never figured my first blog would be a rant about my ex-boyfriend. Where to begin; Last night I decided to meet him(Jason) at a local wal-mart to get a baby names book, even tho I had the name picked up already. Is that bad that I went ahead and picked out a name? Jason doesn't want anything to do with the baby and did not shown any interested until last night. Today is another story, Jason's saying that our son isn't his and clearly he's the only guy I was around at the point of conception and has been for over 2 years now. He doesn't understand that I have enough on my plate without his babbling about stupid stuff. I came home last night and my blood pressure moitor showed I was at stroke level and this morning my side is killing me. I do everything I can for my son and self, but it gets harded as the time goes on. I'm a high risk pregnancy becuase I have kidney problems and high blood pressure, but thats not going to stop me from carrying the healthest baby I can. I love my kid even though I haven't seen him yet. I'm working on fixing up my own place, but I have to replace the floor, replace the carpet, and do a couple of other things before moving in, UGH! I've been put on bed rest since day one, I'm very limited to what I can do and I can't work, so I spend my day putting my stuff on ebay to make my house livable for my child and I. I've also bought and paid off a new vehicle that'll be better then the peice I was driving. I think I've done good for myself and the prepairing of a new child, but to him it's not good enough. Why am I so concered about what he thinks? He is not worth my time of day.

Sorry for the long story.

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2 Comments on I give up...


queen serenity - Saturday, 4 Apr
PEACE TO YOU RIGHT NOW YOU NEED TO THINK ABOUT WHAT IS IMPORTANT AT THE MOMENT. I KNOW IT HARD WHEN YOU DIDNT LAY DOWN AND MAKE THE BABY YOURSELF AND THERE IS CERTAIN THINGS THAT WE EXPECT FROM THE FATHER OF OUR CHILDREN. BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING AT THIS POINT IS YOUR HEALTH AND THE BABY AND YOU CANT STRESS YOURSELF OUT ON HIM YOU HAVE TO BE THERE AND BE STRONG FOR YOUR CHILD AND YOURSELF EVEN IF HE DOESNT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO YOU THEN WHAT. SO BE STRONG AND IN TIME YOULL GET OVER IT PEACE

maebeth - Saturday, 4 Apr
Hi. Don't we all wish it were as easy as it should be to walk away from a loser. I've been in that boat myself and it's never easy to walk away. However, you're absolutely right that it's time to take care of yourself and baby. You don't need the stress or him for that matter if he's not even accepting responsibility for helping with the baby. Wait a few months and get a paternity test at birth just to make him look really dumb/jerky to his friends/family. Ok, maybe that's a little vindictive, but hey he's being a jerk. Anyways, good luck and don't over due the house stuff. The house will be there after the baby is born. Good luck and God bless.