| Beegee | |
| Beegee has 112 days to go and is now in week 24 | |
 | Age: 32 Country: USA Province/region: Upstate NY City: Partner: Peter (my Moose) Children: Yes, 2 Pregnant: Yes Due date: 09 Oct ,2013 Occupation: Power System Dispatcher |
| Online: 4 days ago. Last updated: 75 days ago. Member since: 1120 days | |
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So I was at the park the other day with a friend of mine and our babies. Heather is a week away from being 9mnths, and her youngest is 3wks old. All along I kept saying that I want to have another one as soon as possible. Which if I listened to my OB, the soonest we could try would be this month, May. I was all for trying this month (even though I'm not sure if I'm ovulating because I haven't had my period yet). Well when we were at the park I had Heather on a blanket with some toys, and my friend passed over her baby for me to hold. I was so excited thinking that I was going to have another little one so soon, and I couldn't wait. And then I looked down at Heather. My little angel, just sitting there, holding her toy. So sweet and innocent. And that's when it hit me. I felt so guilty holding this other baby. Heather didn't give me a look, or cry at me, or give me any sign that she didn't approve of me doing it. But I just felt so guilty. She was all alone on that blanket, no one was paying any attention to her, and my heart broke. I can't do that to her. Since her conception she has been the center of my world. The center of a lot of people's worlds. And now I have to throw a wrench into the whole thing and focus all my attention on a new baby? How fair is that to her? So I've decided that we are going to wait. I can't tolerate the thought that my little girl won't be the center of my world. She deserves more then that, and I plan on giving it to her!!!
7 Comments on It hit me
monika01 - Monday, 14 May
aww thats so sweet !!! you will know when ur ready and ur baby will be ready too !!! i am going for surragocy or adoption in about a yr or 2 .:O)
mylight - Monday, 14 May
your heart will tell you when the time is right !! and coming from a mommy with multiple kids - you will handle it perfectly fine - guaranteed :-)
jdubb - Friday, 11 May
I am not ready either! Maybe in a year or two, if my body still works right at that point!!
lil.pigz - Wednesday, 9 May
Aww, I have felt that way sometimes, usually after I am already pg though,lol. You will know in your heart when the time is right, probably when she is begging you for a little brother or sister;-)
beegee - Tuesday, 8 May
Thanks Ladies. I know I have enough love for multiple babies, I've just come to the conclusion that I'm not ready to focus on another one quite yet
dmayala - Tuesday, 8 May
Awwww...its normal Jayden was 4 when Amarion was born and it hit me that Jaydens whole life was going to change and he was not going to get all my undivided attention anymore, but jayden loves his little brother and the baby ADORES jayden they play all the time. hopefully when we have another one Amarion will react as well as Jayden. When ever I hold my 4 week old nephew and the "baby" (hes already 13 months) sees he cries bloody murder so I for see him being a little more stubborn.
mamadear04 - Tuesday, 8 May
hahah sorry to laugh but those are all normal feelings..I dont madder how long you wait you will always have those feelings..I have to older children 16 and 14 and When the second one that is now 14 came I felt so bad for the first one..Then years after I had my third child and I felt so bad for the older ones..Then I had my forth child and I felt so bad again for the one younger then her..After they come though and after a little getting use to them there I cant fathom life without them...It will all work out ..Do have your second when you are ready.
| 08-5-2012 - It hit me |  My mood while writing this blog:kind of sad |
So I was at the park the other day with a friend of mine and our babies. Heather is a week away from being 9mnths, and her youngest is 3wks old. All along I kept saying that I want to have another one as soon as possible. Which if I listened to my OB, the soonest we could try would be this month, May. I was all for trying this month (even though I'm not sure if I'm ovulating because I haven't had my period yet). Well when we were at the park I had Heather on a blanket with some toys, and my friend passed over her baby for me to hold. I was so excited thinking that I was going to have another little one so soon, and I couldn't wait. And then I looked down at Heather. My little angel, just sitting there, holding her toy. So sweet and innocent. And that's when it hit me. I felt so guilty holding this other baby. Heather didn't give me a look, or cry at me, or give me any sign that she didn't approve of me doing it. But I just felt so guilty. She was all alone on that blanket, no one was paying any attention to her, and my heart broke. I can't do that to her. Since her conception she has been the center of my world. The center of a lot of people's worlds. And now I have to throw a wrench into the whole thing and focus all my attention on a new baby? How fair is that to her? So I've decided that we are going to wait. I can't tolerate the thought that my little girl won't be the center of my world. She deserves more then that, and I plan on giving it to her!!!
7 Comments on It hit me
monika01 - Monday, 14 May
aww thats so sweet !!! you will know when ur ready and ur baby will be ready too !!! i am going for surragocy or adoption in about a yr or 2 .:O)
mylight - Monday, 14 May
your heart will tell you when the time is right !! and coming from a mommy with multiple kids - you will handle it perfectly fine - guaranteed :-)
jdubb - Friday, 11 May
I am not ready either! Maybe in a year or two, if my body still works right at that point!!
lil.pigz - Wednesday, 9 May
Aww, I have felt that way sometimes, usually after I am already pg though,lol. You will know in your heart when the time is right, probably when she is begging you for a little brother or sister;-)
beegee - Tuesday, 8 May
Thanks Ladies. I know I have enough love for multiple babies, I've just come to the conclusion that I'm not ready to focus on another one quite yet
dmayala - Tuesday, 8 May
Awwww...its normal Jayden was 4 when Amarion was born and it hit me that Jaydens whole life was going to change and he was not going to get all my undivided attention anymore, but jayden loves his little brother and the baby ADORES jayden they play all the time. hopefully when we have another one Amarion will react as well as Jayden. When ever I hold my 4 week old nephew and the "baby" (hes already 13 months) sees he cries bloody murder so I for see him being a little more stubborn.
mamadear04 - Tuesday, 8 May
hahah sorry to laugh but those are all normal feelings..I dont madder how long you wait you will always have those feelings..I have to older children 16 and 14 and When the second one that is now 14 came I felt so bad for the first one..Then years after I had my third child and I felt so bad for the older ones..Then I had my forth child and I felt so bad again for the one younger then her..After they come though and after a little getting use to them there I cant fathom life without them...It will all work out ..Do have your second when you are ready.
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Children
Latest blogs
31-5-2013 - Didn't mean to look, or did I???
22-2-2013 - Date is set
31-1-2013 - Well I'm Back
08-5-2012 - It hit me
14-2-2012 - 6 months
11-12-2011 - Stop growing!!!!!!
21-11-2011 - Well hello there!!!
22-7-2011 - Let the waiting begin
18-7-2011 - Coming to an end
29-4-2011 - Update
09-3-2011 - Terrified, once again
13-2-2011 - Random thoughts
11-2-2011 - So I guess this one is for real...
15-12-2010 - My pregnancy
04-12-2010 - Well here we go
16-11-2010 - I finally broke down, and started that science class
10-11-2010 - Can my luck be changing???
09-10-2010 - A quarter of the way there
20-9-2010 - Things are looking up
28-8-2010 - Well it's official, we have an angel now
14-6-2010 - it's off my chest, well almost...
28-5-2010 - First Timer
31-5-2013 - Didn't mean to look, or did I???
22-2-2013 - Date is set
31-1-2013 - Well I'm Back
08-5-2012 - It hit me
14-2-2012 - 6 months
11-12-2011 - Stop growing!!!!!!
21-11-2011 - Well hello there!!!
22-7-2011 - Let the waiting begin
18-7-2011 - Coming to an end
29-4-2011 - Update
09-3-2011 - Terrified, once again
13-2-2011 - Random thoughts
11-2-2011 - So I guess this one is for real...
15-12-2010 - My pregnancy
04-12-2010 - Well here we go
16-11-2010 - I finally broke down, and started that science class
10-11-2010 - Can my luck be changing???
09-10-2010 - A quarter of the way there
20-9-2010 - Things are looking up
28-8-2010 - Well it's official, we have an angel now
14-6-2010 - it's off my chest, well almost...
28-5-2010 - First Timer
Agenda
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