30-6-2008 - Updates On ME

My mood while writing this blog: fufilled

Im so busy making sure my boys have everything that I quite often forget to make time for me!! Here's what I have been up too!

****Under Construction****

April 14th 2008
I had my scheduled c section this day and everything with it went great. I had more scarring than he expected to see but all went well with the surgery.
No sooner than baby Sean was out of me my blood pressure came back down to normal and actually was a little low. So I got to stop taking the blood pressure medication that day.
I was up and walking myself up to the bathroom by midnight that night. It was alot easier on me this time. My biggest problem I had besides the initial pain was my side effect from the morphine
itching itching itching . . .

April 15th 2008
So my pain level remained pretty good today except for when I had to use the restroom. Now that sucked. My biggest problem started arising this afternoon. The trapped gas in my body has become extremely painful. Its hurting all the way up to my right shoulder. Its so sharp at times that I feel like I can't even breathe. I have never wanted to pass gas so bad in my life.
By late in the afternoon my bestfriend had come to visit and I could barely talk to her cause I had to take shallow quick breaths because the pain was so bad.
Everytime I would tell them how bad it got, they would give me chewable gas tablets and tell me it was gonna get better.

April 16th 2008
Well I awoke and my prayers had been answered as the gas was being passed :) But my knew symptoms were severe swelling in my legs and feet. They kept telling me that it was gonna get worse before it got better. Boy oh boy were they right.
Back in July 2006 I had a blood clot in my arm that was about the length of it. Since then anytime Im sick they worry about blood clots. So they were making me walk every hour and keep those damn hose and compression stockings on, which I think made my swelling worse, but it was for a good cause. Thats all I needed was another blood clot.
**FYI - the blood clot is the reason why I can't be on birth control**
I also started bleeding badly today, which it came out all of the sudden and scared me to death. I called the nurse because it was that bad. But she assured me I was fine. I dont understand why you bleed after a c section though. Dont they suck all that out??

April 17th 2008
I am running a low grade fever but they are letting me leave and come home from the hospital anyway. I just have to watch it.
They took my staples out and it hurt alot more this time then it did on the first time. It made me cry and I had to take pain medication afterwards.
Im exhausted and excited!! But the good news is the baby and I are home! I Have missed Mason so much! Its good to be back.

April 18th 2008
So this has been a great first day home but I started running a low grade fever around noon, which makes you feel crappy enough.
But then it spiked up over 101 and stayed that way all evening. I didn't want to do anything!
So I called my grandmother who used to be a nurse and told her and she said . . .
"honey your milks coming in"
I kind of just made a funny face
"she said yea, me, your mom, and your aunt did the same thing"
I still really didn't believe her
"she said just watch"
And like clockwork the next morning my fever gradually diminished and my MILK WAS IN
I love my grandma . . . she is so smart :)

April 25th 2008
All has been going well. I couldn't have asked for a better baby :) Mason is an awesome big brother as so far has not shown any jealously whatsoever. He actually has been very protective!
My mom really helped me out by helping me get Mason back and forth to daycare while I have been healing, but now I'm back on my game and physically I feel really well.
I am starting to have some baby blues though. I had them with Mason a little, but this time I am having them a little worse. I hope they just get better and go away.
I don't want people to think I'm not happy, cause I am SO HAPPY, but sometimes i just . . . cry.
It will get better I know it!

May 5th 2008
Today I had to go back to my doctor for a wound check since I had a c-section. I obviously took the baby with me.
I did really well until we got have way there and then I just started crying for no reason, but I gave myself a pep talk and got it back together before walking inside.
But while sitting in the waiting room my eyes just kept tearing up over and over again. I just don't understand it.
(Could I seriously be depressed that the baby is here and Im not pregnant anymore? I was miserable how could I possibly feel this way?)
They took me back. . .
My blood pressure was PERFECT
My weight was down 25 POUNDS
My incision has HEALED
I should be happy, considering I had a really hard time with healing after Mason. My goofy doctor even gave an attempt to make a joke that I seriously didn't get but my mind was elsewhere.
I should NOT have kept my mouth shut about the crying, but I feel weird to tell him. So I didn't say anything. Because of everything that was going through my mind I forgot to ask my important questions...lol go figure.

May 20th 2008
So today I had my 6 week post partum check up. Once again I cried on the way there and I cried in the waiting room. Why? Cause Im retarded I suppose....lol
I just sat there and watched the pregnant people walking in and out of the waiting room. I saw some really skinny almost green in the face (i thought to myself, hah..newbies...as I grin).
Then I would glance over and see HUGE girls with the looks of distress and severe discomfort on their faces (yep, I feel their pain).
Then I would glance in front of me and my beautiful baby boy . . . THAN I SMILED :)
My blood pressure once again was PERFECT
My weight was down 43 POUNDS
My uterus was PERFECT
Than the nurse comes in to inform me that they were gonna go ahead and do my yearly while I was here so I wouldn't have to come back for a year.
"excuse me??!!? I have not shaved and Im still bleeding" (I was not expecting this)
NO LIE THE DR LOOKED STRAIGHT AT ME AND STATED
"blood in the vagina is like snot in the nose"
MY MOUTH DROPPED...lol.....that did not make me feel better.
But I went ahead with it and it hurt really bad.
She didn't check my breasts since I am still breastfeeding. But told me the results will be mailed to me. I preceded to ask her about my scar tissue and she told me I could have a couple more kids if I wanted, but it might be a little more difficult. I COULD HAVE MORE KIDS....THAT MADE MY DAY!
So I got up the strength to ask about my crying. She told me its absolutely normal :)
She said she wishes she could just hand it out at the water fountain thats how common this problem is. She prescribed me a low dose medication. I felt relieved . . . finally!
**UPDATE--My test results were NORMAL**

May 27th 2008
I had a well check at the health department today. They were very impressed with my weight loss already and I told them that really the only problem that I had left was my carpal tunnel syndrome that showed up during my pregnancy, was still really hurting me.
She told me to continue wearing my brace and it should, slowly, but gradually get better.
My only other problem is I'm pretty anemic. Me? I have never been anemic before. But they said it was fairly common after having a baby, especially after having a c - section. But just to pay attention to it.

July 1st 2008

I have been dizzy for a couple weeks now, but I attributed it to my new medication. But today at work I almost blacked out after turning around. I called my ob/gyn who prescribed me the medication to tell her what happened.

She asked me about other symptoms I have been having.
I told her I have had bad headaches, been dizzy, was anemic at my last drs visit, and I was still bleeding since my son was being born.
She said didnt you call a couple weeks ago about the bleeding?
I said yes.
She said did it get better?
I said yea for a couple days but I started bleeding again. . . goin on 11 wks postpartum.
She said are you exclusively breastfeeding?
I said yes.
She got silent and I got nervous.
She said I need you to come in for an ultrasound.
I said if the bleeding doesn't get better? (which they told me a couple weeks ago)
She said NO . . . I mean tomorrow.
She fit me in an already full schedule.
I said is this serious?!?
She said its possible that some placenta could of been left behind.You should not be bleeding still especially because your breastfeeding.
I said well what would that mean?
She said you would have to have surgery again.
My heart sank!

So tomorrow at 9:30 I am on my way to the hospital for ultrasounds and bloodwork . . . Im scared . . . I hate bein put to sleep . . . I just don't understand how they could miss something like that!!???

July 2nd 2008

So I went for all my testing this morning scared to death. Its been a long time since I have had a lower abdominal ultrasound that doesn't have to do with a baby.
Let me tell you, its not anywhere as exciting as when a babies in there. lol
SO. . . I have had vaginal ultrasounds before and the fact that they put on a condom on the probe still cracks me up.
I was a little uncomfortable about it this time because I am actively bleeding and I almost felt sorry for the tech, but

~~~~anyways~~~~

She does the ultrasound and really doesn't say much to me but I wouldnt of been paying attention anyway because it hurt so bad I almost cried.
Afterwards I saw the dr and she told me that my uterus was the correct size (good), my ovaries werent swollen (good), there was no thickening of the lining in the uterus (good), I had some cysts on my ovaries (normal for me), but my cervix was severely retroverted/tilted.
Well they had told me something about that when I was pregnant but they never said anymore about it so I never paid attention to it.
So for me to better understand she drew me a picture.....
If your uterus is supposed to lay on a horizontal line like this -----
a retroverted or tilted uterus looks like this /
but mine looks like this |

lol so I was like okay?? (so my cervix is like pointing in the air. lol)
She told me just due to the laws of gravity its taking my body longer to expell the blood (makes sense)
So whys it not old blood (cause its bright red)
She said its irritating the lining of my uterus causing it to continue to shed.
So she said normally they would put a person on birth control (but I cant have it of course)
So....I just have to wait it out....and have a possible blood transfusion if I drop any lower (im low 2 points now)
So NO SURGERY . . . but I now have these goofy looking exercises to do to help MY UTERUS tilt the right way. Now I know why sex hurt so bad last weekend!!! lol
I would like to thank you for your encouraging words . . . it made me feel a lot better :) I love you guys!

. . . . damn uterus

August 2nd 2008

I am surely experiencing some massive hair loss these days. Its enough that it is bothering my self esteem a little. I feel like everywhere I go, when people look at me, they notice it. I know its in my head...but...WOW!! Just to give my hair a little extra boost I decided to start taking my prenatal vitamins again..

August 25th 2008

My cycle in no way shape or form has come back to normal. Its really starting to drive me crazy. To make matters worse for the first time ever we had a condom break on us. AHHHH! Oh yea and if the calculations were correct my due date would be about the exact same as it was with Sean. How funny would that be??
So I was supposed to start on the 22nd and it hadn't happened. I couldn't take it anymore and actually went a bought a test. It was so funny because I was picking up a prescription for my 4 month old and buying a pregnancy test. LOL
Anyway, it was negative. Which is what was meant to be, that's how we see it.
On Sunday I was SO SICK. I had the worse stomach flu. Thank goodness that Brandon took charge of the boys, because I could not move out of the bed. I felt like I was on a boat.
Then this morning while I was getting ready for work AF showed up. 31 day cycle?? Hmmm . . .

September 23rd 2008

So before I had Sean I was really struggling with my asthma and chronic bronchitis. I mean I was coming down with bronchitis every month and a half. It was crazy! I even came down with it about 3 times when I was pregnant. I was sick from Thanksgiving until the new year.
But it has changed (knock on wood). Ever since I have had Sean I have not gotten bronchitis ONCE! Now I will admit I have had a couple asthma issues, but nothing that hasn't resolved itself in two days. WEIRD!
But here in the last month I have caught TWO stomach viruses. I used to NEVER catch stomach viruses. I am so confused. Its like my immune system is better, but its worse. Or like I have a completely NEW immune system. Pregnancy does really does weird things!