KENNEDYS MOMMY's I-am-pregnantblog

KENNEDYS MOMMY
	Age: 20 01/21 Country: THE GREAT OLE U.S.A. Province/region: NY City: NYC Partner: My hubby of 2 years and partner of 12 Children: Yes, 1 Pregnant: Yes Due date: 05 May ,2010 Occupation: Med Student
	Online: More than 3 months ago Last updated: 848 days ago. Member since: 1106 days
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31-8-2009 - So I went to get an early pregnancy test at the drs and he called me later to tell me that I am......

My mood while writing this blog:
STRESSED

PREGNANT FOR THE THIRD TIME... Am I happy? I would lie if I would say that I was, because I am not, I was supposed to make an appointment to go ahead with birth control but it got pushed back because I had to fly across the country to be with my family. I am not happy at all. Why did this have to happen to me again? I have no way of telling my husband because i dont have an address nor number to reach him and he has not picked up a phone to call me in the time that he has been gone. I was supposed to be gone to Houston by now, but now I am not leaving til Thursday and returning on Sunday. I am so stressed at the moment I dont know what to do. I wont have an abortion, because I dont believe in them, but I dont want another baby. I know it takes two, but I hate that he intentionally tried to get me pregnant. He busted holes in the condoms and told me afterwards. He even took them off when he knew he was about to do his business and now I am stuck with the consequences of having another child. I know its wrong, but I wont seem him for at least another 2 years. I am thinking that I am not going to tell him or any of my family members and just give the baby up for adoption, because I really dont want another child right now or anytime soon. Selfish I maybe, but I dont think I can give the baby the love I give Kennedy, because I actually wanted her and this one I dont. I know somebody else who cant bare children will give it the love it needs that I cant.

I hate that I am in this predicament, but I think I have made up my mind. I dont want to keep this baby so I will hide the pregnancy from all, except the dr and give it up when it is born. I guess it is now time for me to look into adoption agencies. I know New York should have plenty to choose from. I cant believe I am really pregnant. according to my dr I am about 4 weeks, but because I havent had a normal cycle since before the miscarriage I dont know exactly.

3 Comments on So I went to get an early pregnancy test at the drs and he called me later to tell me that I am......

Emauk - Tuesday, 1 Sep
sorry just stummbled across your site..and read a few of your blogs..Gosh in 3 months you've gone from ttc to m/c to actually getting pregnant and searching for an adoption agency..I appriciate that you don't want an abortion..and it's very brave of you to give your child up to a loving family that will give him/her a good home..but I don't think you will be able to hide it from people..just wanted to wish you luck..it sounds like you've got alot of work and thinking to do..and sorting out stuff..because it seems from your blogs that everything is a bit "up in the air" at the minute..take care..x

kelly5150rn - Tuesday, 1 Sep
You can't keep a secret like that from your husband. If he found out later on it could cause a lot of problems. plus you don't need the weight of that hanging on your soul. God has a plan for everything. I think you should tell your husband that you are giving the baby up. Hopefully he will understand. I'll pray for you...

Jmajor-payne - Monday, 31 Aug
OMG!! girl u are doin a remarkable brave thing...and at least u realize you can do this baby the greatest gift by finding it great parents...SO 1 more question ur hubby isnt coming home for any breaks or holidays? I know that school has to give them a break sometime? I can't believe he hasnt called u. How long he been gone??

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