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17-3-2009 - emotions...ahhhh!! Emotions!

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

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I'm not sure if anyone else is experiencing this the way that I am but I have been generally absolutely ...crazy, I guess is the best way I could put it. This morning I woke up in the worst mood, just BAM in a bad mood, and whenever I get in these moods I get a sour taste in my mouth-litterly...a sour almost "metal" like taste in my mouth, and my head feels heavy. I don't know why I'm getting like this but I'm the worst person to be around when I'm like this. I feel bad for my fiance, because he's doing everything right..I just can't stand the way that he does anything, the way he drives...I litterly will pick on the way he turns, how fast hes going-going to fast, going too slow, not putting on his turning signal when he's supposed to...the fact that he keeps buying this beef jerky that i can not stand at all...the smell is disgusting. The fact that him and his dad just HAVE to move a new washer and dryer into the back room within one day, when I have to work the night shift tonight. And, now I'm so worked up that I can't sleep. I'm mad at my boss for putting me on the 3rd shift when in my interview I said "I can not do the night shift"...which everyone agreed..but i'm supposed to be happy I have a job right now, with this economy..but it doesn't make me feel any better knowing that there are people that work there that AREN'T pregnant. I feel like the pregnancy excuse is a FINE excuse...especially when how i've been feeling. I don't have a huge belly..I barely have any belly actually, but I feel very, very, very pregnant...mentally, and so does my body, I dont care if i'm not big. Is it bad that I WANT simpathy?? I WANT my dr to say that I have to not work. I dont feel like I can do my job anymore, I hate my job while being pregnant, it's so risky...like working with the youth that I do. And i'm soo disappointed with my sex life-missionary isn't comfortable anymore, me being on top...i'm too insecure right now for that, and everything else is AWKWARD. I want the fiance to make me feel beautiful...but no othr person can make you feel that way-you have to believe it. I'm walking on a daily basis with him, and even playing a little soccer..which makes me feel great, I love competition:)Alright, my rant is over, I'm really going to try and sleep a little before I go in for the shitty night shift, which in my opinion is VERY VERY unhealthy for the baby, and aiding to my unhappiness.

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4 Comments on emotions...ahhhh!! Emotions!


jamie - Monday, 23 Mar
Do you have headaches??? I get migranes and when I feel like that it is usually an indicator that one is coming on. I get in a really fowl mood for no reason at all-just angry. Also my neck gets sore on one side or the other.

kelly5150rn - Thursday, 19 Mar
I feel you girl! Aren't people supposed to treat us special for the time we r pregnant? I mean we are creating new life here!!!!

liltnkygrl - Tuesday, 17 Mar
i hear you about the overnight shift!!!! such bullcrap! they should have laws against pregnant women having to work overnight!

mommie2bsm - Tuesday, 17 Mar
Ohhh I feel for you hun! I swear my hormones and stress levels are increasing by the day. I've become very quick tempered and very blunt about my frustrations. Not only with my DH but EVERYONE! Hang in there! Just try to remember it's only for a few more months... OH GOSH that seems sooo long! lol