LuvnJayde's I-am-pregnantblog

LuvnJayde
	Age: 24 Country: USA Province/region: South City: High Point Partner: "God will never leave nor forsake me." ~Hebrews 13:5 Children: Yes, 1 Pregnant: No Occupation: teacher
	Online: 21 hours ago. Last updated: 144 days ago. Member since: 297 days
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19-6-2009 - am I doing too much? advice, please!!!

My mood while writing this blog:
thoughtful

If you've read any of my pass blogs you know things btwn BD and I have been up and down through my entire pregnancy and since Jayde's birth. Most of it is b/c of the BD, Roland, doing me wrong (cheating, lying, etc.). Lately he hasn't worked very hard to spend time with her and his fam doesn't bother to try to spend time with her either; mind you I live 15mins. away from him and all his fam. Well, I've been back and forth about how to approach the situation to make it the best for my lil princess. But, I have to admit it's hard sometimes knowing how he's done me, and I still don't trust him.

Well...Sunday is Father's Day and I wanted Jayde to spend time with Rol and MY dad (her grandfather). Seeing as my dad is more involved in Jayde's life than Rol I was trying to give my dad more time with her (and me). So...we came home this morning (Friday) and planned to stay until after church and lunch on Sunday. Then, we were gonna go back to HP so Jayde could spend the evening with Rol. Well my parents changed their plans and are going to SC to be with my mom's dad Sunday morning; the fam is supposed to take MY dad out to eat/celebrate Sunday evening.

My question is am I doing too much to go BACK to HP tomorrow so Jayde can be with Rol Sunday morning and then turn around and come back to my parent's to be with MY dad Sunday evening?? Mind you, my parents are about 1.5 hours from where I live so I would be driving about 6 hours (3 extra hours) to make this work. It IS Rol's FIRST Father's Day and again I'm just trying to do right. Also, mind you Rol has given me a total of about $300 through this whole thing (pregnancy and subsequent birth). I don't think he'll be giving me any gas money to help with this little travel.

I've really been in my Bible and praying and trying to live with the mentality of WWJD (What Would Jesus Do?) So please give advice! I need to know if this is just going overboard to stretch myself and bend over backwards to have Jayde with her father on Father's Day.

7 Comments on am I doing too much? advice, please!!!

BlackRussian - Saturday, 20 Jun
Make him come to you, he needs to man up and come see her, its not your job to carry all the weight on your shoulders, make him work around YOUR schedule.

mrsscorpio - Saturday, 20 Jun
Did he (Rol) call you and request that the baby spend Father's Day with him? If I were you I wouldn't waste my time...what if you do all that driving then he's acting like an ass when you get there...I wouldn't set myself up for the rejection. Spend time with your family, the people who really care and support you, to hell with Ro. That's just my opinion. Good Luck.

Chocolate Mami - Saturday, 20 Jun
Never allow someone to be your priority , while allowing yourself to be their option...he know where u n baby girl are....let him man up and come to you...I say chill with your fam ... Don't cater in to him::.I feel what u r say'n but sometimes we got to keep hard....Easier said than done but just try to do u

mommabell - Saturday, 20 Jun
Yes, you are doing too much, as far as thinking of BD is concerned. I understand thinking about WWJD, and I doubt He would choose to take a sweet little baby girl to visit a family that actually showed some love for her. My DH's family hasn't even called since BEFORE our baby was born. Do you think that we give any consideration to how they feel? NADA. Go visit your Daddy, you are his little girl, and he should be able to spend more time with his grandchild on fathers day. What a wonderful gift! If Rol was so concerned about his first fathers day, I think he would have already gone out of his way to make plans. I hate to say it, but the more you bend over backwards to do the "right" thing, the more he will take advantage of it. Go see your Dad.
:) xoxox

AKA.mom - Friday, 19 Jun
I agree with both ladies. If he wants his daughter then he would figure out a way to see her or atleast would've called and said hey father's day is coming up and I'd like to spend it with my daughter. Honey since your father has been more of a father to her then I would be going to spend the day with him.

samanthadawn - Friday, 19 Jun
i agree fully! you know he won't appreciate it so why bother and i know thats what you're thinking but you're also thinking maybe i should do the "right" thing but really what is the right thing protecting your little girl from someone who really could care less or stressing yourself out trying to force him to care i had to think about that one myself constantly making sure aidens sperm donor knew every little update since he is 6000 miles away and i get re paid by no thank yous no calls to see how he's doing and when he was supposed to visit he bought a car instead so you gotta think about is it worth it to stress yourself out over it thinking he'll change or just relax and if he's gonna change he'll do it on his own and he'll come around but untill then don't stress yourself out trying to force him to care.

1 day at a time - Friday, 19 Jun
Honestly if he isnt trying to help you out so he can spend time with his daugter then I would put in that extra effort. You dont want to wear yourself out for someone who isnt going to appreciate it. But thats just my opinion

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