17-8-2009 - why are the guys coming out the woodwork??

My mood while writing this blog: confused

Well, hopefully yall read the blog about my date (2 blogs back). Lucas is cool and i think i really like him...i just hate this distance and it seems as if things are getting even busier (haven't even talked the last two days). I'm back at work and i may even get a 2nd job...so yeah this distance is going to be difficult if we decided to be serious.

On top of deciding about Lucas, now an ex has popped up. His name is Stan; we dated my junior year of college (2004-2005) and i broke up with him (still to this day don't really know why, guess i just wanted freedom from a relationship). When we dated before Stan would do things like drive 1.5 hours one-way just to take me to a movie, write me poetry, read the Bible with me, and buy me jewelry (even a ring!). After we broke up Stan stopped trying to do things to better himself and after he pledged a fraternity he started drinking, smoking, and partying a lot. We kept in touch and even still played around with the idea of being together (went on dates, messed around, etc.), but nothing serious. He's had other girls and obviously i've had other guys.

Well, Stan went off for basic training with the Army Reserves and we've been chatting through myspace since he returned. We actually hadn't spoken in about a year. He came over for the first time Thursday to meet Jayde...it was cool b/c he has a lot of nephews so he's good with babies. Neways, i thought we were just gonna start kinda hanging again but NOOOOO! LOL, he's made it clear the past few days that he wants to rebuild our relationship. He tells me how i made him a better person and he wants what we had back. I've made it clear that we'd have to take things really slowly b/c of Jayde and i didn't want him to be casual about this if he was gonna be around her (i just don't like the idea of Jayde growing up seeing Mommy with a different man every month or even year). He seems legit and genuine, guess we'll find out...he's coming over again this evening.

I dont know, ladies! What to do, what to do...i just wanna know exactly what to do and not regret my decision! LOL, yeah riiiiiight. ANY advice is welcomed!

An edit: ladies, i am not TRYING to find a man...thats just it, they're kinda just coming around lol. So, yes, i may need to just tell them i'm going to chill for a bit.