24-6-2010 - Hard day today

My mood while writing this blog: Sad

Wow, Livie is now 3 months! I cannot believe it! This week has been a little hard for me. The other morning, my uncle died of type 1 Diabetes. His funeral was today. I wasn't able to be there. On top of that, today is the 21 anniversary of my parents death. My Grand pappy is really upset about it. All his own kids are all dead. My Grandma is upset that her son is dead and blames my mom for their death. And my sisters both blame me. It is really hard to hear what my family has to say. I am 22 and even I know that even though it is hard, it happened 21 years ago and they need to stop blaming each other for it all. It has been a really rough day. My DH took me out to get my mind off of the whole thing. He even took me to the new Wal-Mart and bought me a game for the XBox 360. I had a pretty good time, but it is still hard. I cannot imagine what life for Olivia would be like if Josh and I died when she was either 6,4 or almost 2. I can't imagine how she would cope. I think the hardest part of it all is that my parents, don't have the opportunity to see their grandbaby. I don't remember my parents much and that hurts too. On top of EVERYTHING....I feel like I am about to start my period and know it is not time. Grrr stupid cramps. Any ways, hope all you ladies are doing well with your babies.