02-4-2008 - March 24th, 2008

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

March 24, 2008

I'm feeling a lot better as far as my back goes today. I spent the entire weekend laying on the couch trying to relax. Its still a bit sore, but I have another appointment tomarrow so if it is still bothering me I can just as Dr. D if he can do anything to help.

I am feeling really really bummed out. Its been about 4 weeks since I found out I was pregnant, and I am really suprised at the lack of "give a shit" that I am getting from my friends. I have two very close friends right now, Nancie and Suzanne (both are my neighbors). Suzanne is probably the closer of the two, she is actually going to be in the OR with me when this baby is born. But in the last few weeks I havent hardly seen or talked to either of them. I went out of town about two weeks after I found out I was pregnant and was gone for a week, and now that I am back, it seems like no one cares about whats going on with me. I know Im probably sounding pretty selfish, but its not fair! I feel so alone, and my husband thinks I am jsut being crazy. But I dont know what to do. I feel like everyone is mad at me for something but I dont know what. Before I got pregnant I used to smoke, and have a glass of wine from time to time. And we (my girlfriends and I) used to sit out talking around a fire almost every weekend. But lately, they havent invited me out to talk at all... I know I cant smoke anymore or drink, but I can still sit out and talk. There are no laws saying a pregnant lady cant socialize with those who do. I dont know what to do, or what to think... Im sad. I dont want to lose my friends. I dont want there to be rough feelings going around... Im sick of being paranoid. Im sure its nothing, but Im feeling very sensitive lately.