Manda22's I-am-pregnantblog

Manda22
	Age: 30 Country: Canada Province/region: City: Charlottetown Partner: 32 Children: Yes, 3 Pregnant: Trying to conceive Occupation: Dental Assistant
	Online: 1 days ago. Last updated: 60 days ago. Member since: 196 days
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16-7-2009 - awake

My mood while writing this blog:
sad

Im just laying in bed DH is out for a few deserved beers with the boys...I find it hard to sleep without him home so I thought I would type a little blog.

Its been 47days since we found out Jordan had no heart beat and 31 days since my D&C and I still have not had AF yet. I dont relaly know why but everyweek I go into the pregnancy by week forum and read all about what "your baby is now doing" I dont really know why I do this to myself???I get totally upset all over again and cry.....

We have been doing lots of fun stuff the past few weeksnow that I am physically feeling better but its still hard. iam just sad...alot! Iwant to wakeup and realize it wasa horrible nightmare and be happily 16 weeks pregnant.

I found out today about someone who's GF is PG and they were NOT planning on it and are young and he has been in and out of trouble with the law and they dont have steady jobs, anyway they are PG and upset to be and then there are families like us who want nothing more then to have ahealthy child and would be wonderful parents and have the means to provide for children...and what do we get heartache and pain. We have angles instead of children...My heart aches so much for my DD and DH.

I see my OB on Aug 6th...Hopefully AF will have come and gone by then.

Getting sleepy....off to bed

Smooch~ <3

3 Comments on awake

2krazekdz - Friday, 17 Jul
Hey girl. It is one of the truly ironic tragedies of this world that people who don't want children are always blessed with more than they can handle and those who are dying for them always have the problems. It's only those few lucky ones who manage to fall somewhere in between. I'm sure you'll be getting a visit from AF shortly; after that, hopefully the healing can begin.

butterfly-angel - Friday, 17 Jul
Ah Manda - its rough sometimes....For me it is exactly 3 months today since my little one became an angel....and though the days are easier - I still cry a lot....the pain doesn't go away - and I don't think it ever will - we simply learn to live it and carry on....Sending you a great big hug hun xxx

mrsw - Friday, 17 Jul
I know exactly what you're going through and I'm so sorry. It's a very tough time and not many people understand unless they've been in your shoes. I wish I could say it does get a lot better but 3 months after my 2nd m/c it still doesn't hurt any less.

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