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25-8-2008 - MY NEW BLESSINGS-BIRTHING STORY

My mood while writing this blog: HAPPY, EXCITED, OVERWHELMED,TIRED

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IT'S BEEN AWHILE SINCE I'VE BEEN ON HERE. I HAD MY BABIES:) JAEL CHALICE WAS 5LBS 2OZ BORN AT 8:05A.M. AND JELANI ZAMIR WAS 5LBS 7OZ BORN AT 8:06A.M. BOTH THROUGH C-SECTION. AS EVERYONE KNOWS WHO READ MY BLOGS, I WAS EXTREMELY FRIGHTENED OF HAVING A C-SECTION. I BELIEVE THAT THE LORD HEARD MY CRY AND TRULY PUT ANGELS IN MY ROOM. I HAD TO BE TO THE HOSPITAL AT 5:30 A.M. TO BE PREPPED AND ALL THAT. WHEN I ARRIVED THEY FOUND THAT MY BP WAS HIGH AND I HAD "A LOT" OF PROTEIN IN MY URINE. THIS WAS FUNNY TO ME BEING AS THOUGH THE DOCTOR HAD BEEN SENDING ME TO THE HOSPITAL ALL WEEK FOR MY BP AND EVERYTHING KEPT COMING BACK FINE. ANYWAY, THE NURSE WAS LIKE "GOOD THING YOU'RE HAVING THE BABIES TODAY." MY LOVELY DOCTOR CAME IN AND DID ANOTHER U/S TO MAKE SURE THE BABIES WERE STILL BREECHED 'CAUSE SHE SAID THAT SHE DIDN'T WANNA GIVE ME ONE IF SHE DIDN'T HAVE TO. THERE WAS STILL A LITTLE HOPE IN ME THAT SOMETHING HAD CHANGED. UNFORTUNATELY, THINGS WERE STILL THE SAME. MY SURGERY WAS TO BE AT 7:30 A.M. I FELT MYSELF BECOMING VERY NERVOUS. I WAS SHAKING REAL BAD. THE PART THAT I HAD BEEN FEARING HAD FINALLY ARRIVED. IT WAS NOW TIME FOR ME TO GET MY SPINAL AND MY HUSBAND COULD NOT BE IN THERE FOR THAT PART. SO I WAS LIKE "WHO'S GONNA HOLD ME?!!" I HAD A LOVELY NURSE NAMED LIZ WHO COACHED ME THROUGH THE WHOLE THING AND MY ANESTHESIOLOGIST WAS "DA BOMB!" SHE DID IT SO FAST I DIDN'T REALIZE IT WAS DONE UNTIL I NO LONGER COULD FEEL MY LEGS:) EVERY DOCTOR THAT I STARTED OFF WITH, I FINISHED WITH. THEY WERE ALL NICE AND CARING. I DIDN'T HAVE TO CURSE ANYONE OUT-WHICH IS ALWAYS A GOOD THING:-) HEARING MY BABY GIRL & BOY CRY FOR THE FIRST TIME WAS SO SURREAL. I COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT THE DAY HAD FINALLY CAME. JAEL WAS BORN BUTT FIRST WITH HER LEGS CROSSED AND JELANI WAS BORN FEET FIRST. DR. SAID I WOULD'VE HAD TO HAVE A C-SEC ANYWAY EVEN IF I DELIVERED VAGINAL. HOW IRONIC IS THAT! THE LONGEST PART WAS GETTING SEWED BACK UP BECAUSE I ALSO GOT MY TUBES TIED. I STAYED IN THE HOSPITAL FOR 4 DAYS AND WHEN THEY FINALLY LET ME GO I RAN! THIS IS ONLY BECAUSE I KEPT RUNNING A FEVER AND THEY DIDN'T KNOW WHY AND PLUS MY STOMACH WAS STILL ROCK HARD. THE FIRST COUPLE OF DAYS HOME HAVE BEEN A CHALLENGE. THE BABIES HAVE PUT THEMSELVES ON THEIR OWN SCHEDULE. WHICH USUALLY RESULTS IN THEM BOTH BEING AWAKE AT THE SAME TIME! BEING AS THOUGH I'M BREASTFEEDING, IT'S HARD TO KEEP THEM BOTH SATISFIED LONG ENOUGH UNTIL THE OTHER FINISHES BECAUSE THEY DON'T LIKE FEEDING AT THE SAME TIME. THEY'RE DEFINATELY DIFFERENT FROM MY FIRST SET AND IT'S BEEN 7 YRS. SINCE I'VE HAD TO FEED TWO BABIES! BUT I'M MANAGING AND MAINTAINING. MY EMOTIONS ARE STILL OUT OF WHACK. I TRY TO STAY BUSY SO I DON'T SIT AND CRY ALL DAY. THE WORSE TIME IS WHEN I'M ALONE AND REALIZE THAT I CAN'T HAVE ANY MORE CHILDREN. THAT I WILL NEVER HAVE THAT FEELING AGAIN OF GROWING ANOTHER HUMAN BEING INSIDE OF ME. WE DIDN'T WANT ANY MORE CHILDREN. AND I KNOW I DID THE RIGHT THING BECAUSE MY HUSBAND AND I HAVE BEEN HAVING CHILDREN SINCE I WAS 19 AND I AM CONSIDERED HIGH RISK. I KNOW THAT MY BODY WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE ANOTHER PREGNANCY. LET ALONE ANOTHER SET OF TWINS. MY DOCTOR WANTED ME TO TIE THEM FOR THAT REASON. BUT KNOWING ALL THIS DOES NOT MAKE IT ANY EASIER. SO I'M REALLY TRYING TO COPE WITH THIS. I GUESS IT'LL TAKE ONE DAY AT A TIME. AFTER ALL, EVERYTHING IS STILL FRESH. MY MOM SAID TO GIVE IT TIME AND EVERYTHING WILL TURN OUT O.K. I'VE DEFINATELY BEEN BLESSED WITH 9 BEAUTIFUL, HEALTHY CHILDREN AND I CAN'T COMPLAIN. THE LORD HAS BEEN GOOD TO ME!! AND I CONSIDER IT AN HONOR TO BE A MOTHER. ESPECIALLY WHEN THERE ARE SO MANY COUPLES OUT THERE WHO STRUGGLE JUST TO HAVE ONE. I DON'T TAKE THAT FOR GRANTED!! I'LL PUT PICS UP OF THE BABIES AS SOON AS I GET MORE FREE TIME. UNTIL THEN BE BLESSED:)'

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4 Comments on MY NEW BLESSINGS-BIRTHING STORY


shockedandamazed - Tuesday, 26 Aug
Congrats on the babies! I know you are excited. I am getting my tubes tied as well. I hope all works out for you in the end. It is going to be really hard knowing that I will never be able to have children again but the lord works in mysterious ways so you never know.

mommy-of-6-little-blessings - Tuesday, 26 Aug
You have definately been truly blessed with your babies! I found out today that because Kobi is breech, I will have to have a csection and I am terrified! How did you get through it? I am flipping out right now! Plus, I have a personal situation that is affecting me even more that I don't want to elaborate on. I can explain privately better. I pray that my fears will be lessened but I don't belive they will be! Any advice on how to cope with going in would be greatly appreciated!
I hope that your older children are helping with the younger ones and you are getting adequate rest to ensure your body is healing! Let me know how everything is going hun! Brightest Blessings to you!!!

mommyh - Tuesday, 26 Aug
Congratulations on the little prince and princess. And yes take it one day at a time when it comes to your emotions. And I wish you and your family nothing but blessing.

4timesthelove - Tuesday, 26 Aug
CONGRATULATIONS MAMAS. That is awesome that everything went so well for the birth of your prince and princess! I know what you mean about mourning the loss of it being permanent about not having another baby. I've been there. I had to tell myself that I should be happy and blessed that all my children are healthy and made it here without incident. I don't want to push it as I am high risk as well. Anywho...Congratulations again!