11-7-2008 - 35 Weeks!!

My mood while writing this blog: Feeling good, getting excited...

We ran into Target the other evening. While I was standing there perusing the linens, a little boy (about 4) came up to me and boldly said (as only a 4 yr-old little boy can) "Is there a BABY in your tummy?" I smiled down at him and said, "Yes, there is! And he is a boy!" He asked with a cock of his head, "What's 'is name?" "His name is Ty." I replied pleasantly, and still smiling - not even aware of what he was thinking! Suddenly he reached out and lifted up my shirt to take a look at this little guy!! LOL! I caught him before he was able to expose me to the world at large and explained that he is UNDER my skin, that for now he lives INSIDE. He was undaunted by all of it and traipsed off after his mother, leaving me in pleasant wonderment about the overall approval a Mother-in-Waiting receives from everyone... and in a society where talk about "population control" (esp here in CA!) is becoming quite the buzz. Strangers will pause, smile, and let me pass first! How often does one even get NOTICED? Be 35 weeks pregnant, and you WILL be NOTICED!! LOL!

I also enjoy the fraternity of mothers out there. We smile knowingly and understandingly at one another. Sometimes we speak words of encouragement and often exchange hellos, knowing we will probably never see each other again. It's a very special time in a woman's life, and everyone seems to know it ~ either by experience or instinct.

The only group that I have found that stare at me with some shock or even disdain (yes, disdain!) are young, lithe, tanned girls of about 16-19. They strut by me with their long firm sleekness and I just smile... I remember the days of being so obsessed with and proud of my body. I expected it to work for ME, bringing me all the joy and completeness I felt I needed by being admired and desired. How backwards. I still am determined to care for it ~ it's where I live! :) But I know in a much deeper way that it truly IS in GIVING that you receive. And giving LIFE to another soul?? Oh my.... there are not words... What an honor. What a priviledge.

I just hope I remember that when I see my new stretchmarks!!

5 more weeks. Then I realize the period of all kinds of adjustments begin... that I will feel overtired and underappreciated, frustrated and unqualified, frumpy and maybe tearful... but for now (aside from the occasional nausea and backache) I feel fairly strong, content and at peace.

One more thing: to the mothering friends I have met here, I love and appreciate each one of you. Thank you for the many gifts you have given me.