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 | Age: 24 Country: United States Province/region: Arizona City: Partner: James Children: Yes, 3 Pregnant: Not anymore Occupation: USAF |
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Okay, so I am starting a very in depth training academy about 4 weeks after my scheduled due date. If you have read my page you will see that I have two young girls and we are going to have a newborn little boy. Between my husband and I the kids only need daycare on Mondays and Fridays for about 8 hours so we think it will be a great experience for them to have a nanny or babysitter that could sit down with them and give them proper attention while we are at work. I don't think two days is a week is bad at all, and really it is half a day on both days because part of the time they are sleeping. ANYWHO! SO I HIRED A NANNY. We pay her VERY well, she also needed a place to stay so we hired her as a live in until she gets her own place and it has been working fine since she and her daughter and dog moved in. My girls like her alot, but I'm not impressed with her cleanliness and effectiveness in maintaining the level of discipline we have established. BUT AGAIN, because it is for a limited amount of time, I kept positive thinking that it will be good for them to experience a little bit of variety. We hired her immediatley to be on call on the basis that she could live with us for free, and this way if I went into labor I wouldn't have to worry about dragging the girls with me to the hospital until our family could get here.
The last two nights she has not come home.... Really none of my business where she is at or what she is doing, and truly if I needed something and I could call her and get ahold of her I don't give two poopies. HOWEVER, she left her little dog behind at my house. For two nights it has woke up my entire family including the girls at 1 a.m. and proceeded to piss all over my carpet and tile despite me letting it outside to go potty. I got the kids back to bed and scrubbed the floors muuch to my dismay and was back in bed by 2:30 a.m. The stupid dog kept barking and I tried to put it with our dogs and that didn't work I tried to let it outside and that didn't work, I tried everything to get this little booger to quit barking but it would not SHUT UP. At 4 a.m. it woke up my family again and we had a repeat of the piss floors and hour and one half lapse in sleep for myself and my girls. So between the dog and my 8 month old daughter, who was well on her way to sleeping through the night for the very first time I managed about 2 hours of sleep. Furthermore I tried to call her last night and all this morning and her phone is off. WTF?????????? Good thing I'm not in labor right? Now I can't drag my tired kids to go workout (which is important because I have to maintain a tip top level of fitness for the academy I am starting that essentially pays her pay check) , I can't get ahold of her and I am super annoyed. I want to help her out but the entire purpose of her being hired was to be a nanny to the kids and to be there for me in case I have to go to the hospital. NOT FOR ME TO BE STRESSED OUT, TAKING CARE OF HER DOG, and CLEANING UP MY HOUSE AFTER HER AND HER CHILD. Really I feel like the nanny. And just a sidenote while I'm ranting, she hasn't bought groceries or dog food so they have been eating our food. I treated them to lunch twice with no thank you's. I am sooooooooo over this....
Is this grounds for dismissal or reprimand? Finding a nanny is hard but we offer fantastic pay and the hours are sweet also so I think I could find another one but I have to be able to rely on them ... if I miss one day out of my academy I'm out. What do you all think? Am I rude or un-called for or is this as out of hand as I feel?
18 Comments on Deal Breaker?
EloiseAndHarrys-Mummy! - Monday, 2 Feb
in two words, FIRE HER! sounds like shes your teenage daughter not your nanny. :S
thebradybunch - Monday, 2 Feb
omg she would so be gone!! U have enough going on w/o having to "babysit" somebody else! She's suppose to be there to help u,not vise versa! I would get rid of her now while there's still time to get something else. Obviously these are her habits & u surely don't want to have to deal w/this when its really important.
KiMikeBaby - Monday, 2 Feb
Just in case you need two more cents, YES FIRE HER!
number5forme - Sunday, 1 Feb
I would go with the consensus here - get rid of her...quickly!!!! Your kids are way too precious to be put at risk with someone who CLEARLY does not have her priorities right. What else has this woman been neglecting in her free stay??? I have heard way too many horror stories about nannies. Invest in a hidden video camera and I bet it will pay dividends - you will see what this woman is up to when you are not there and will come in handy for your future nanny!!!
You are in no way 'obligated' to give this woman a second chance. When one door closes another will open and you will soon see that you ill find the perfect solution. The best advice you can take from everyone that have left messages for you is - do it now, do not wait!
My 3 Sharpie Miniz - Sunday, 1 Feb
i soooo understand your frustrated!!! talk about being walked all over!!! i would give her notice to move out!!! and for next time i would say they have a trail peiord. so it give you a chance to know how they are going to be in the future and they understand that youre watching and seeing what they are doing for you! and you wont feel bad or a bit obligated (even though you shouldnt) when you let them go! no one should be going what your going through, so close to youre due date!! but like you said, she not reliable if you do go into labor, and her job isn't to stress you out and be a burden to you. think about it... you paying someone to give you and your family a head ache!! with no respect on what you are doing for them.. Girl!!! you can pay me and ill bring all the problem to your house!! lol
i wouldnt let it go on any long though, it's ashame she has to find another place to go, but you not paying her to walk all over you!!!
rosa89 - Saturday, 31 Jan
i would let her go obviously she has a place to stay there is no way i would put up with cleaning up after her her kid and her dog no freakin way if she is capable of that how many other things is she capable of
BOOMERBABY - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would be completely ticked off. Have a discussion with her immediately is there anywhere else you cant take your girls to until you find another. Say a church that offers and education program two days a week its not that expensive and they get to interact with other kids in a healthy educational enviroment. that way youd dont have to deal with flaky nanny and pissy dog! haha
jeff - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would think 1 warning would be fair. (how would you feel if you were fired without ever being warned about your behaviour at work) Then if it happens again change the locks and fire her. (let her in for her stuff while your there)
my4kids - Saturday, 31 Jan
I don't know what to say i would never hire a nanny ever but thats just me . However she is taking advantage of you for sure your best thing to have done was check out your cousins. or siblings that would have taken the job instead there you have somebody you know and trust and would do what they should do.It's always best having family close i don't trust other people around my children at all .Best luck on what you decide but i sure would get rid of her asap!
2under2 - Saturday, 31 Jan
It sounds like she's taking advantage of a good situation. Like you said, you're offering good pay and good hours, so the least she could do is be respectful to you and your family! I'd make that point very clear to her ei. buy some groceries, take care of your own dog etc... and her behaviour continues, I'd dump her! You don't need that stress right now : )
scanzaniello - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would fire her. She has not taken care of her job and also it sounds to me like you are being her nanny. Get rid of her while you can. She might be a squater.
kaeljoval - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would look at it if you were running a business would you put up with that as her boss? Because essentially you are her boss, and her job is taking care of what you need her to take care of. I would look for someone else, IMO. Hope everything works out :]
oregonhawaiigirl - Saturday, 31 Jan
I found this website where you can hire an au-pair from another country that is live in and comes backed with lots of references and is looking for an opportunity to work for a family just like yours. I was thinking about using one myself at one time. When it comes to having 3 kids like you will, the cost may make sense instead of daycare. Be careful with the one you have now, talk to her about her dog and in the meantime look elsewhere so you are prepared.
mariela - Saturday, 31 Jan
She comes across kind of shady. I wouldn't fell safe w/ her around. I think you should get rid of her. She is not reliable and I think its just going to add you more stress in the long run.
prettybabyblues - Saturday, 31 Jan
wow she sounds too inconsiderate and irresponsable and not dependable at all. i wouldn't trust her. i would try that nanny website, i know they do really thourough evaluations on everyone. this girl i went to church with in michigan got a job as a nanny out in cali (through nanny.com?! i can't remember the exact name but its really popular)and she is amazing with kids and should be considering she has 13 siblings...It sounds like you are an amazing family to work for and have a lot to offer and you deserve so much better!
newmommad - Saturday, 31 Jan
she doesn't seem responsible at all, and there were so many "red flags" popping up at me while I read your blog, that I would find someone else and get rid of her immediately. She isn't making your life easier at all, its like you have more kids to take care of.....so my advice is get rid of her, besides it sounds like you have more stress now. That's what I would do anyway. Good luck!
mamix2nluv - Saturday, 31 Jan
its obvious that her priorities are not in the right place...im pretty sure its time to move on...her actions reflect her personality and if she has a "i dont care" attitude you dont want her to be doing anything with your kids...i worked at a daycare so i know a lot of the basics...no request is too demanding *unless its just ridiculous* she sounds like she's just taking advantage of easy *great* pay and not doing her job...its all about trial and error hun...now you know what to look for!!! goodluck!!!
Joiride - Saturday, 31 Jan
You need to talk to her... but in the mean time, LOOK FOR SOMEONE ELSE.. You dont need the stress and headache when you are doing her more of a favor then she is for you... I would get rid of her..... She is taking advantage of you.... When you talk to her, it's more to feel her out.. Write down RULES, like Buy your own food, Clean after your dog, phone to be on, or atleast respond in a timely fashion... etc.... See how she reacts... if you like her that much, give her a chance on a SHORT ROPE... BUT I think get rid of her, but have a back-up.... Keep your stress level down! if ppl move in with you, maybe no children or pets would be best.. maybe a mature student.. they would love a free room! and appreciate it! I completely understand u and the situation... I have my fingers crossed... Keep me updated... I would love to see how this ends up..... Joi Joi..........ps, have your hubby with you when you talk to her.. just like a business.... you hired her, she gets a sit down meeting to see the serious-ness of this issue... this is your family.. TAKE CHARGE!
| 31-1-2009 - Deal Breaker? |  My mood while writing this blog:Exhausted and Pissed |
Okay, so I am starting a very in depth training academy about 4 weeks after my scheduled due date. If you have read my page you will see that I have two young girls and we are going to have a newborn little boy. Between my husband and I the kids only need daycare on Mondays and Fridays for about 8 hours so we think it will be a great experience for them to have a nanny or babysitter that could sit down with them and give them proper attention while we are at work. I don't think two days is a week is bad at all, and really it is half a day on both days because part of the time they are sleeping. ANYWHO! SO I HIRED A NANNY. We pay her VERY well, she also needed a place to stay so we hired her as a live in until she gets her own place and it has been working fine since she and her daughter and dog moved in. My girls like her alot, but I'm not impressed with her cleanliness and effectiveness in maintaining the level of discipline we have established. BUT AGAIN, because it is for a limited amount of time, I kept positive thinking that it will be good for them to experience a little bit of variety. We hired her immediatley to be on call on the basis that she could live with us for free, and this way if I went into labor I wouldn't have to worry about dragging the girls with me to the hospital until our family could get here.
The last two nights she has not come home.... Really none of my business where she is at or what she is doing, and truly if I needed something and I could call her and get ahold of her I don't give two poopies. HOWEVER, she left her little dog behind at my house. For two nights it has woke up my entire family including the girls at 1 a.m. and proceeded to piss all over my carpet and tile despite me letting it outside to go potty. I got the kids back to bed and scrubbed the floors muuch to my dismay and was back in bed by 2:30 a.m. The stupid dog kept barking and I tried to put it with our dogs and that didn't work I tried to let it outside and that didn't work, I tried everything to get this little booger to quit barking but it would not SHUT UP. At 4 a.m. it woke up my family again and we had a repeat of the piss floors and hour and one half lapse in sleep for myself and my girls. So between the dog and my 8 month old daughter, who was well on her way to sleeping through the night for the very first time I managed about 2 hours of sleep. Furthermore I tried to call her last night and all this morning and her phone is off. WTF?????????? Good thing I'm not in labor right? Now I can't drag my tired kids to go workout (which is important because I have to maintain a tip top level of fitness for the academy I am starting that essentially pays her pay check) , I can't get ahold of her and I am super annoyed. I want to help her out but the entire purpose of her being hired was to be a nanny to the kids and to be there for me in case I have to go to the hospital. NOT FOR ME TO BE STRESSED OUT, TAKING CARE OF HER DOG, and CLEANING UP MY HOUSE AFTER HER AND HER CHILD. Really I feel like the nanny. And just a sidenote while I'm ranting, she hasn't bought groceries or dog food so they have been eating our food. I treated them to lunch twice with no thank you's. I am sooooooooo over this....
Is this grounds for dismissal or reprimand? Finding a nanny is hard but we offer fantastic pay and the hours are sweet also so I think I could find another one but I have to be able to rely on them ... if I miss one day out of my academy I'm out. What do you all think? Am I rude or un-called for or is this as out of hand as I feel?
18 Comments on Deal Breaker?
EloiseAndHarrys-Mummy! - Monday, 2 Feb
in two words, FIRE HER! sounds like shes your teenage daughter not your nanny. :S
thebradybunch - Monday, 2 Feb
omg she would so be gone!! U have enough going on w/o having to "babysit" somebody else! She's suppose to be there to help u,not vise versa! I would get rid of her now while there's still time to get something else. Obviously these are her habits & u surely don't want to have to deal w/this when its really important.
KiMikeBaby - Monday, 2 Feb
Just in case you need two more cents, YES FIRE HER!
number5forme - Sunday, 1 Feb
I would go with the consensus here - get rid of her...quickly!!!! Your kids are way too precious to be put at risk with someone who CLEARLY does not have her priorities right. What else has this woman been neglecting in her free stay??? I have heard way too many horror stories about nannies. Invest in a hidden video camera and I bet it will pay dividends - you will see what this woman is up to when you are not there and will come in handy for your future nanny!!!
You are in no way 'obligated' to give this woman a second chance. When one door closes another will open and you will soon see that you ill find the perfect solution. The best advice you can take from everyone that have left messages for you is - do it now, do not wait!
My 3 Sharpie Miniz - Sunday, 1 Feb
i soooo understand your frustrated!!! talk about being walked all over!!! i would give her notice to move out!!! and for next time i would say they have a trail peiord. so it give you a chance to know how they are going to be in the future and they understand that youre watching and seeing what they are doing for you! and you wont feel bad or a bit obligated (even though you shouldnt) when you let them go! no one should be going what your going through, so close to youre due date!! but like you said, she not reliable if you do go into labor, and her job isn't to stress you out and be a burden to you. think about it... you paying someone to give you and your family a head ache!! with no respect on what you are doing for them.. Girl!!! you can pay me and ill bring all the problem to your house!! lol
i wouldnt let it go on any long though, it's ashame she has to find another place to go, but you not paying her to walk all over you!!!
rosa89 - Saturday, 31 Jan
i would let her go obviously she has a place to stay there is no way i would put up with cleaning up after her her kid and her dog no freakin way if she is capable of that how many other things is she capable of
BOOMERBABY - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would be completely ticked off. Have a discussion with her immediately is there anywhere else you cant take your girls to until you find another. Say a church that offers and education program two days a week its not that expensive and they get to interact with other kids in a healthy educational enviroment. that way youd dont have to deal with flaky nanny and pissy dog! haha
jeff - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would think 1 warning would be fair. (how would you feel if you were fired without ever being warned about your behaviour at work) Then if it happens again change the locks and fire her. (let her in for her stuff while your there)
my4kids - Saturday, 31 Jan
I don't know what to say i would never hire a nanny ever but thats just me . However she is taking advantage of you for sure your best thing to have done was check out your cousins. or siblings that would have taken the job instead there you have somebody you know and trust and would do what they should do.It's always best having family close i don't trust other people around my children at all .Best luck on what you decide but i sure would get rid of her asap!
2under2 - Saturday, 31 Jan
It sounds like she's taking advantage of a good situation. Like you said, you're offering good pay and good hours, so the least she could do is be respectful to you and your family! I'd make that point very clear to her ei. buy some groceries, take care of your own dog etc... and her behaviour continues, I'd dump her! You don't need that stress right now : )
scanzaniello - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would fire her. She has not taken care of her job and also it sounds to me like you are being her nanny. Get rid of her while you can. She might be a squater.
kaeljoval - Saturday, 31 Jan
I would look at it if you were running a business would you put up with that as her boss? Because essentially you are her boss, and her job is taking care of what you need her to take care of. I would look for someone else, IMO. Hope everything works out :]
oregonhawaiigirl - Saturday, 31 Jan
I found this website where you can hire an au-pair from another country that is live in and comes backed with lots of references and is looking for an opportunity to work for a family just like yours. I was thinking about using one myself at one time. When it comes to having 3 kids like you will, the cost may make sense instead of daycare. Be careful with the one you have now, talk to her about her dog and in the meantime look elsewhere so you are prepared.
mariela - Saturday, 31 Jan
She comes across kind of shady. I wouldn't fell safe w/ her around. I think you should get rid of her. She is not reliable and I think its just going to add you more stress in the long run.
prettybabyblues - Saturday, 31 Jan
wow she sounds too inconsiderate and irresponsable and not dependable at all. i wouldn't trust her. i would try that nanny website, i know they do really thourough evaluations on everyone. this girl i went to church with in michigan got a job as a nanny out in cali (through nanny.com?! i can't remember the exact name but its really popular)and she is amazing with kids and should be considering she has 13 siblings...It sounds like you are an amazing family to work for and have a lot to offer and you deserve so much better!
newmommad - Saturday, 31 Jan
she doesn't seem responsible at all, and there were so many "red flags" popping up at me while I read your blog, that I would find someone else and get rid of her immediately. She isn't making your life easier at all, its like you have more kids to take care of.....so my advice is get rid of her, besides it sounds like you have more stress now. That's what I would do anyway. Good luck!
mamix2nluv - Saturday, 31 Jan
its obvious that her priorities are not in the right place...im pretty sure its time to move on...her actions reflect her personality and if she has a "i dont care" attitude you dont want her to be doing anything with your kids...i worked at a daycare so i know a lot of the basics...no request is too demanding *unless its just ridiculous* she sounds like she's just taking advantage of easy *great* pay and not doing her job...its all about trial and error hun...now you know what to look for!!! goodluck!!!
Joiride - Saturday, 31 Jan
You need to talk to her... but in the mean time, LOOK FOR SOMEONE ELSE.. You dont need the stress and headache when you are doing her more of a favor then she is for you... I would get rid of her..... She is taking advantage of you.... When you talk to her, it's more to feel her out.. Write down RULES, like Buy your own food, Clean after your dog, phone to be on, or atleast respond in a timely fashion... etc.... See how she reacts... if you like her that much, give her a chance on a SHORT ROPE... BUT I think get rid of her, but have a back-up.... Keep your stress level down! if ppl move in with you, maybe no children or pets would be best.. maybe a mature student.. they would love a free room! and appreciate it! I completely understand u and the situation... I have my fingers crossed... Keep me updated... I would love to see how this ends up..... Joi Joi..........ps, have your hubby with you when you talk to her.. just like a business.... you hired her, she gets a sit down meeting to see the serious-ness of this issue... this is your family.. TAKE CHARGE!
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