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aadams
Age: 24
Country: United States
Province/region: Arizona
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Partner: James
Children: Yes, 3
Pregnant: Not anymore
Occupation: USAF
Online: More than 3 months ago
Last updated: Nothing added yet.
Member since: 1548 days
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02-2-2009 - It is DONE Relieved My mood while writing this blog:
Relieved



I fired her. It went super smoothly although I did make her cry. There is way more to the story than just this but I already typed it all out and it got lost when I tried to submit it! lol* SO making a long story short she is gone. I have never felt more rigbt in a decision in all my life. My stress level is WAY down and I'm just a happier person. It is really too bad for her, but letting her go was the best thing ever for me. Thank you for all of the encouragement and helping me know that I wasn't being too critical.

For all of you that suggested that I have family watch my children.. not all of us have the luxury of a large extended family. My entire family except my brother sister and mother (Who are in Medical school, and mother is three states away) have passed from cancer. Surely that would be my first alternative to a nanny.

I must begin my training 4 weeks after my son is born so he will not be eligible for child care until he is three months. Unfortunately I can't divulge my occupation both military and civilian, but I don't have control over when I start working again, so please enjoy that freedom and don't take it for granted.

I have been given a gift in my life and it entitles me to be a productive member of society by having a less-than ideal occupation for a mother and wife. I enjoy my job, it is what I am good at, but I would surely love to be at home with my children much like those that suggested I stay at home. Boy if it were only that easy. Furthermore I don't think my children will be traumatized by my absence for 5 hours a day two days a week, and alternatively I believe that they will be proud of their mother and more well-rounded individuals who are not restricted to the typical patriarchal gender stereotypes of a housewife mother and bread-winning dad... which are not terrible things at all, but they will have the freedom to CHOOSE if that is what they want and they will not feel expected to fill those gender norms if it is not for them, although I find those two stereotypes to be very rewarding choices, just not the right ones for myself and my husband.

Thank you for your input and I do apologize that some of you don't have a complete understanding of my situation and offer suggestions that do not coincide with our lifestyle because I can't post my life details on here.

Thanks everyone for helping me make a great decision!



5 Comments on It is DONE


mamix2nluv - Thursday, 5 Feb
im proud of you...you are standing up for what you think is right and no one should make you feel any less of a person *if they are* you are a great woman and a great mom and i admire that fighter spirit you have!!! stay strong mama you'll find your perfect nanny before to long!!!

marli - Tuesday, 3 Feb
I feel your pain! Being a military mom myself it gets hard sometimes, people definitely aren't as understanding. Keep your head high and don't let others patronize you!

thebradybunch - Tuesday, 3 Feb
You go girl! Im so happy u fired her, & happy that it has made u feel better. You'll find someone else before u deliver and you'll look back & be glad u let her go.: )

no2intheoven - Tuesday, 3 Feb
Very well put. No one has the right to place judgement on you or your family. Not everyone is able to have family around to help (me included) out during desperate times like these. I'm glad that you fired her. I tried to comment but it got lost somehow.
Anyway if you are still looking for a nanny, I hope it all works out for you. You seem like a well rounded mother with a good head on your shoulders. Everything will work out.
Some people on this website place judgement alot and I really don't like that. If we could all stay at home with our babies we probably would but due to the economic state we are in right now some families have to work or chose to work. Either way I wish you the best, hun!~


number5forme - Tuesday, 3 Feb
Bummer about the retype! (I have had that happen to me too so now if I am writing any lengthy comments or blogs I copy as I go so I dont lose it all!)

Great to hear that she is gone!!!

Sorry to her about our family members.
Shame you dont have the option to stay at home but good on you for your work contibution and example. It is the best that we can do for our children - setting a good example and showing them that there really are choices in life if we chose to 'create' them.
Good luck with finding a new Nanny!
Photos
 (2008, 08, 22)  (2008, 08, 22)  (2008, 08, 22)  (2008, 08, 22)  (2008, 10, 10)  (2008, 10, 10)  (2008, 10, 10)  (2008, 10, 10)  (2009, 02, 26)  (2009, 02, 26)  (2009, 02, 26)  (2009, 02, 26)  (2009, 02, 26)  (2009, 02, 26)  (2009, 02, 26)

Children
Aspen (2004) Cypress (2008) Jericho-Ewan-Hajek (2009)

Latest blogs
02-2-2009 - It is DONE
31-1-2009 - Deal Breaker?

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