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04-12-2010 - When are we going to catch a break?

My mood while writing this blog: so freaking lost

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So ya'll know what has been going on with Bobs health and how its taking its toll on his mood and our relationship. To top everything off, we got a notice in the mail today and he has 2 weeks to pay $4000 in back child support. His lawyer put it in the divorce agreement that the back child support would be taken out of his 401K. We are guessing that this is more back child support, that was accumulated while his lazy lawyer was getting the papers to the judge, and the 2 weeks for the judge to actually sign them. We dont know what we are going to do. I tell you... all hope is lost. I am a positive person and I try to see the best in every situation, but I no longer see the light at the end of this tunnel. We take a step forward and slide 3 steps back. We are losing ground, and have lost hope. Our pending wedding in Japan is no longer a possibility, and I cant see it being possible in the next 5 years at least. I dont know what to do. I told Bob that I want to get a job to help. We both hate daycare. It makes your kids sick, and I have the biggest issue in trusting others with my babies. Plus in our little tiny town there arent good paying jobs (except the oil field), so all the money I would make would go into paying for daycare anyways. Its a lose-lose situation. So here I am stuck, unable to help with anything. I just have to sit by watching my fiancee deteriorate, and our future fall apart. Then I cry and am so depressed, and what happens? Bob gets angry about it. I told him that I need his sympathy and he just doesnt care. When he gets overwhelmed, or treated like crap at work, or when hes stressed, I take him by the hands and tell him to take a deep breath, and that we will figure it out like we always do. Where is that in return? Why is it so hard for him to hug me and comfort me. He was cooking supper when he found out about this added child support and I was supportive and comforting, but then I just broke down, so I went to the bedroom and just bawled my face off. He comes back and says "I need help with the kids, I cant cook and watch them. I dont have time to lay down and cry". This hurt me so much. First off, he was just so uncaring that I was losing my shit, secondly he just was telling me yesterday that watching the kids is "so easy" he doesnt know why I get frustrated sometimes. Well now he knows. Its not easy, but he wont admit that. I just need a hug

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3 Comments on When are we going to catch a break?


mfbrown - Monday, 6 Dec
I wish I could help! I am here whenever you want to vent! Guys totally dont understand our need for comfort when things get rough and have convienient amnesia when it comes to how difficult it is with children! My husband gets frustrated quick with two yet if i cant get "enough" done around the house he thinks i am lazy or something. HUGS!! I hope things start looking up soon.

nhowa9 - Sunday, 5 Dec
awww im sorry to hear all this... it is horrible huh, when it rains it pours. when you think nothing can possibly get any worse.. it does. but on the bright side things will always work themselves out and everything starts to turn positive again, just keep your chin up and power on. your a strong willed woman and will get through it. We have been smacked wih my fiancees childsupport and its not a happy thing to have to deal with (i especially feel a little cheated as this kid has had nothing to do with my life, or sams for thatmatter) so it just seems unfair but thats life. I feel your frustrations at wanting to help by working too, i feel the same way you do and dont see much point when daycare costs what would be a large portion of my weekly pay anyway. =( things will get better though!! just hang in there x

*Summer Babies* - Sunday, 5 Dec
*BIG HUGS* I am so sorry mama! I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better.

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