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29-5-2008 - Baby blues

My mood while writing this blog: down

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I have no idea what the hell is wrong with me. I havent been happy in days and it seems to be getting worse. I just feel like crying, I dont want to go to work everyday like i used to, all i want to do is sleep and i can't even do that. I seriously think that my boyfriend is bipolar and its driving me insane. Last night he was super sweet and really nice and this morning when i woke him up to take me to work because he needed my car, he was a complete ass. I dont get it. He's just so flip floppy these days and i dont know why. He wont tell me what's wrong, all he says is "you." and it makes me feel horrible. We have 8 weeks left and he doesnt want to spend any time with me at all. He comes home late from work and when i want to spend time with him he says no. I dont get it. Right now i just want to cry. He "jokes" with me alot and calls me fatty names but its getting out of hand. My family thinks its funny but when you're almost 8 months pregnant the last thing you want to here is that you're fat. I fucking know this.... i see the scale every two weeks. I'm not a dumbass. I have absolutely no desire to do anything right now. I just want to go home and sleep and maybe this will all go away. I'm so looking forward to Hailee finally being here because i know that she is one person that will love me just because... she wont need a reason to... just because I'm her mom... thats why. I just have this sudden urge to burst out in tears and i dont know why. I have anxiety for no reason and my heart feels like its in my throat. I need some words of encouragement. xxxx.

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1 Comments on Baby blues


niseybear - Thursday, 29 May
It's called hormones luv. My last few weeks of pregnancy I was out of control. As much as I loved being pregnant, but week 38 I was OVER IT! I just wanted my son here and I knew everything would be fine. The post partum kicked in about a week after he was here and that was rough too. I cried when my husband said he loved me! LOL It comes and goes now too, but I can blame AF now! LOL Just take it easy and think of the day when you're holding your daughter in your arms.