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14-12-2008 - Advice Needed!

My mood while writing this blog: Angry

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Ok so here it goes. My neighboor is dead set on adopting thsi baby I have told her time and time again That I will be going through an adoption agenciy. In fact I have one already picked out. She already has two kids and I want to give this baby to a family that does not have any children. I kninda want this to be there miricale baby. Is this wrong of me? She is constantly making me feel like a bad mom. Because I was in a domestic violence situation and the police were called on many occasions and in the state that I live it is required by law to report to DHS in a domestic violence situation. This is part of the reson I am giving this baby up for adoption. The abuser no longer lives here but I just dont need the added stress. Social Services nevercame to check anything out or even called. I just figured it was because I made the right step in calling and having him removed and not having him back or near my kids at all is why they did not interfear. Well I told her they had bigger fish to fry. And she said no its because you are so darn lucky lots of women have them called on them and get there kids taken away. So I am lucky mine arnt gone as well. I told her that was awful rude. And that the baby was not going to her. She said but mom is going to take you to your appontiments because I have no way of getting to them I live in a very small town there is nothing here but a conner store a bar and a bank. She said my mom can take you to your appontiments but no where elese no grog=crie shopping or anything. Well the agency is willing to help with this expensie and possiably help me relocate. I am not the type to be rude so I answer my door and phone. Today she came over and said ahe wanted me to come to her daughters bday party and I said probably not her daughter is like 13 anyways my kids are 3 and 10mo. explain how that makes sense. Then she looked at my daughter and said you want to come to a bday party and got mydaughter all excited and left. Now my daughter wants to go and I dont really feel comfortable with it. I am sick of her pussy ways. Please how do I tell my neighboor to please stay away.

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3 Comments on Advice Needed!


trinah1016 - Monday, 15 Dec
To be quite honest, you don't have to explain crap to your neighbor. My motto is this, I have three people to answer to in this world: Myself, my husband, and God! That's it. If you don't want her to come around...it's simple, just say "I appreciate your concerns, however this is my business and it is going to remain MY business and I would appreciate it if you would not come by or contact me in any way, shape or form from here on out. If you continue to do so with my fair request given at this moment, you will leave me no choice other than to contact the authorities".

That's it....stay strong!!

mindyisliamsmama! - Monday, 15 Dec
First of all, I think that you're strong for getting out of that abusive situation for you and your kids! How dare she make you feel bad about it!
That being said, if you've told her that you want to give it to a family without kids and you've told her that you've already picked the agency that you're going through, you've done what you can. You can chose to ignore her attention if you want to, but most times, that does not make someone like that go away. You could always tell her that you would never give your baby to the kind of person who would keep someone from going to the grocery store to get food for their other kids and see how that goes over :-) Ok, that's my spiteful side :-)
If the agency will really help you get to your appointments or even relocate you, that would be a good thing. I would contact them first thing Monday morning to explain the situation to them. Having her drive you around will make her think that she has power over you.
Just out of curiosity, why would her MOM be taking you to the appointments, and not her, if she is the one who wants the baby?
I think you've made the right choice in not giving her your baby. I think it's great that you want to give it to someone as their miracle baby and I think that you'll make the right choice on who to give it to!

metsmom - Monday, 15 Dec
Your neighbor sounds like a pain! I would just avoid her. I thiknk you have enough stress without that too. I totally think its wonderful that you have chosen to pick someone who doesnt already have kids. Not that I think people with kids shouldnt adopt by far. But there are so many of us still on the journey to get to love one baby that it would be giving someone their miracle baby. So stick to your guns and do what you feel is best!