cpalmer's I-am-pregnantblog

cpalmer
	Age: 21 Country: Canada Province/region: City: Partner: Hubby Children: Yes, 1 Pregnant: No Occupation: SAHM
	Online: 8 days ago. Last updated: 674 days ago. Member since: 1488 days
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21-8-2009 - Feelings as of now...

My mood while writing this blog:
overwhelmed

Ok so yesterday hubby and i took Sav to the lake and she actually went in the water for the first time ever! YAY! it was awesome, she tried to drink the water lol it was fun, but not shortly after hubby got a phone call from a guy he went to school with ( for those who dont know he got his heavy equipment operator course in June) apparently his friend has gotten hired at the oil sands out west ( other side of the continent VERY far away) and will be getting paid 34.50/hr and he asked my hubby to go with him, worst part is, I THINK HES GOING!?!? dont get me wrong, im soo happy for him to be offered a job in his work field and the money is AMAZING but i wouldnt be able to go with him (i have issues leaving my family) and the cost of living out there is rediculous plus i am plannin on goin back to school down here at some point...i'm so overwhemlmed with emotions, we just got back together in january (i broke up with him before i found out i was pregnant and we have been workin on our relationship since) im going to miss him sooo much, like i cried and cried yesterday at the thought of him leaving me for months at a time :/ like i just got him back and now hes leaving me....i guess im just so used to him being here now....not to mention how Sav will take it, shes getting older now and shes such a daddies girl, she will not be happy about it either....i dont know what to do, because he keeps asking me what i think and im trying to keep cool for his sake, i really do want him to go but if i tell him how i really feel that will influence his decision and i dont want him to miss out on the opportunity because im a friggin sook lol

Heres the worst part ---- this will be my last month TTC :( im devastated and of course, this cycle is the most messed up one i have had since i started trying, theres no way in hell im goin to get pregnant if i havent Od or my body doesnt plan on Oing....im so frustrated, its not fair, i just want to be pregant but im not nor will i be by the time he leaves and so i wont be having our second child for god knows how long !?! ahhhhhhh i hate this, why cant my body work properly!???

ok sorry for ranting but if i dont im afraid i will have a breakdown...thanks for listening ladies, oh yeah check out my chart to see what i mean last pic in my photobook)

Much love

Chasity xoxoxo

15 Comments on Feelings as of now...

yorkie puggle - Wednesday, 26 Aug
OMG Chas, That is amazing for you guys that he will make such great money for your family. I really hope out of all the days you get to see him in the month that one of those days will be your lucky bfp days. I really have good vibes for you, I really hope that bfp is in effect right now. I am thinking of ya! xoxo Dana

mummyyumyum - Monday, 24 Aug
Oh hun I am so sorry to hear what you are going through ((((BIG HUG)))) I think you need to honest with hubby about how you feel, he might be more considerate than you think. Try not to get too wrapped up in emotions until you are sure what is going to happen but I know that is easier said than done xxx

lucy jordan - Sunday, 23 Aug
hi,i am sorry to hear u will be leaving the website,i hope everything works out for u, my mum said to me that if i kept on thinking and trying to hard to get pregnant, i would not end up pregnant, so i stop trying so hard and stopped thinking about babies and 4 months of not thinking about it and letting my body sort itself out, i fell pregnant, if u try so hard and thinking about getting pregnant, it just makes stressed and thats not good for making babies, so please just relax and let your body do all the work, x

Duffy - Friday, 21 Aug
awwww I am sorry hun, but I think what Diane has to say is right. I know things will all work out for the best...which I know that is hard to see right now ******HUGS***** xxxxxxx

trying4thirdangel - Friday, 21 Aug
Sweetie I know this is hard. Just think of this...your hubby is doin this for the well being of your family! It's hard and it will be hard but you have to be supportive of him and thank him for doing what he needs to make sure your DD is happy and healthy and has food on the table. Take a deep breath and PLEASE let me know if you need anything!

Cherryb0m - Friday, 21 Aug
i'm sorry! thats a tough one. when i got back together with my husband (boyfriend at the time) i was living in Los Angeles and he was living in Washington DC. It was after college and i was living with my parents again. My mom is my best friend in the whole world and it meant that I had to make the decision to move away from her to be with him. Well I moved out to be with him and the rest is history. I missed her so much but it was the best decision for me. we got married, moved, purchased a house and found out i was pregnant with DD. I'm not saying thats what you should do. You have to do with you feel right in your heart about what is best for your family. I know the $ is really good but is that what is best for Sav??? good luck sweetie!!!

MamaCas29 - Friday, 21 Aug
Wow. I'm sorry. I know that in some families the husband goes away for work, but I just couldn't imagine that being for me. Especially since you two got back together in January, it seems like time away might do more harm than good. I really don't know what to say. I'm sorry hon. Talk to him and tell him how you feel. Let me know how it goes.

SarahLJ - Friday, 21 Aug
I'm sorry to hear your hubby is thinking of going away to work and I totally agree with hopefully3. I don't believe he should go and leave you and your daughter. He is going to miss out on so much. I hope he makes the right decision for you hun. I can't imagine what you are going through. I couldn't handle it if my DH went to work away for even a few days let alone all that time.

hopefully3 - Friday, 21 Aug
Hun to be completely honest I dont agree with him going! I mean he would be leaving you and most importantly his daughter. He has to think of what that is going to do to her. On the other hand if it is a great opportunity why dont you go with him? I know how hard it is. I am getting ready to move across the county away from my entire family, and it is hard but your daughter and your bf are your family too now. I know its a really hard decision to make hun and I wish you the best!

kbpc3949 - Friday, 21 Aug
I'm sorry Chas but I am with TBT. I don't think he should go. He would miss so much of Sav's life, no money is worth it. You will suddenly become a single mother as well. I think its just too much especially on a marriage that is currently on the mend. I hope it works out for you, I really do. I know you don't want to leave your family, but isn't he your family too? **hugs**

meganh - Friday, 21 Aug
I am sorry about all that chaos and confusion. You know you could state it so that it is not about you but your daughter and tell him you know you guys will be okay but if he thinks he will be able to stay away from his daughter for periods of time like that.....maybe the thought of not seeing his baby grow during this time will change his mind. A buddy of mines husband is in the guards and when he first went overseas it was just them and it was okay but now since they have their son he is acting out when daddy is gone. He has started wetting the bed again and biting at daycare...could be a coincedence but it started when his dad left again.....I think it had a bigger impact on the kid then they thought. Take care and everything will work out the way it is suppose to, whether we realize it or not.

B3thy - Friday, 21 Aug
I am so sorry!!!! I can not imagine not seeing my hubby for that long. I think you can be supportive and tell him you want him to go, but still express how sad you are that he is leaving. he needs to know that you will miss him and plus when he gets to come back it will make it all the more magical for you all. oh good luck and I am sure it will all work out!

DiandClover - Friday, 21 Aug
That's a lot going on in a short time, and it's overwhelming to say the least. Hopefully he will get a schedule that allows him to come home at some point for visits. All the guys I know who work out west are on a schedule to work straight for a certain amount of time, then get sent home for a certain amount of time. Maybe you'll make a 'trip home' baby. :) The money and experience he gains will be good, and give him more flexibility to work back in NS a year from now. I know that is small comfort now, but things will work out for the best!!

fairbanksbaby1 - Friday, 21 Aug
Oh Chasity...I am so sorry! I cant even imagin my husband working that far away! Maybe he will decide to stay. I really wish the best for you. Keep me updated!! Best of Luck!!

thebigtomato - Friday, 21 Aug
I guess I don't understand why he would take the job. I mean, I know it's awesome money in his field, but is money worth being away from your wife and child? I don't know. It just seems weird. No offense intended, I just don't get it.

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