cpalmer's I-am-pregnantblog

cpalmer
	Age: 21 Country: Canada Province/region: City: Partner: Hubby Children: Yes, 1 Pregnant: No Occupation: SAHM
	Online: 8 days ago. Last updated: 674 days ago. Member since: 1488 days
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25-1-2010 - Just a bit of a vent...okay maybe more then a bit

My mood while writing this blog:
sad

okay so i just wrote this whole blog and then it disappeared and now im not even mad anymore and im just too lazy to change the title of the blog *sigh* just my luck eh!?? well i managed to get a screen cap with like half the blog lol so i will add it to this and u can make what u want from that!!

so at first i was talking about this friend i have who is TTC any ways, she said 'at least u have a kid' i was like so????? that doesnt mean it doesnt suck that i cant get pregnant again!? maybe im selfish but when u have only been TTC for 5 mos and theres nothing wrong with u, u shouldnt be saying anything, i have been TTC for 12 mos exacly in 6 days and i have several things wrong with me (fixable with meds of course) and i still havent had a glimmer of hope!! i have been prego before i know exactly what im missing, ive done it before but just bcuz i have a daughter doesnt mean its easier, it just makes it better to deal with bcuz u have something to look forward to with the next one!!!

1264453165

(cont.)...is wrong with me, fixable but by the time i fix this, there will be something else to worry about, will this ever end??? so thats why, thats why i need a break, i need a fresh start and going on the pill is going to give me that, it will give me time to regroup, and prepare for the next however long it takes me to have a baby, im not giving up for good, i want this so bad that i know i will never truely give up until it happens...

with all that being said i have decided what i want to do in terms of the HSG....im going to see the RE and my Obgyn same day lol feb 3rd, i meet with the RE at 9am and then my OB appt is at 1:15pm, im going to ask the RE what my options are and what she thinks is a good course of treatment then im going to do the HSG to clear my conscience so i wont have to keep wondering if that is the reason its not happening, then the cycle after that (will be april by then) i will be going back on the pill (for 3 mos) if i havent gotten pregnant. After that ill probly be doing clomid and the like....dont expect any of this to help anyways but hopefully after the break i will be feeling better about all of this.

Thanks alot for all ur comments, im so lucky to have friends like you who all support me no matter what.

much love, chasity xoxoxo

4 Comments on Just a bit of a vent...okay maybe more then a bit

min41 - Thursday, 28 Jan
Your plan sounds very good hun, hope that you will get more support and love and that if you do not get a BFP after your hsg then the break will do you good. Hugs.

B3thy - Tuesday, 26 Jan
sorry that things have been so overwhelming for you lately! it sounds like you are doing what is best for you and that is all that matters. Good luck girl...you will get your BFP :) keep us posted on your appointment!

DiandClover - Monday, 25 Jan
I feel you on the outside pressure, I am getting it too, but I have grown a backbone when it comes to my reproductive system and I promptly tell my family when they have an opinion to share that is not in line with mine, to back off! Friends have been very supportive thankfully, but for those who don't know the struggles we do, they just don't get it. I have learned to shrug off the 'hurry and have # 2' comments, as they are not usually meant to be nosy or mean, just uninformed. As for your plan - I love it - I think this will work out to your advantage on all fronts. This will give you information, and the break will give you perspective. Sebastian was a 'just off the pill baby' and I believe Sav was an 'on the pill baby' - we're the type that birth control is more like birth propellant! lol!!

SarahLJ - Monday, 25 Jan
I am glad that you have got a plan and hopefully you will be pregnant rather than going on the pill. But if not then I hope that you get pregnant quickly when you do start TTC again. I have to say that I know how you are feeling hun I really do. I hope we both get our BFPS soon enough.

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