13-11-2009 - More upsetting news

My mood while writing this blog: tearful

First of all i would like to thank everyone who commented on my previous blog, really means alot.

I had to go and see the midwife last night because i'd been showing signs of pre eclampsia and they wanted to check me. I was so happy when i saw my favourite midwife!! Anyway when i got into the room she asked how i was and i just burst into tears. I explained about how my pelvis has been and about my appointment on monday. Bless her, she offered to do a sweep for me. I could have jumped with happiness.

Anyway i got myself organised and she started to do normal checks before the sweep ie babys position etc. Thats when she said 'Donna im really sorry but baby's head is no where near pelvis' I was like but i was told on monday it was engaged so she got another midwife to check and yes, babys head is totally free. No point in doing the sweep then!! Again burst into tears because i thought at least i was heading towards the light at the end of the tunnel.

We all talked about my options because i cant bear this pain anymore and the thought of being pregnant for another 2 or 3 wks is just horrible! I had such a traumatic time giving birth to Pearce and i just cant do that again. So the midwife said she was going to try and get me seen by the consultant on Monday to see what the story is.

When we got home me and DF had massive talk about everything. He said that he understood i wanted to go for a vbac but he was done with seeing me in so much pain everyday. Thats when the topic of another section came up. Id said all along that i didnt want that but im totally done now. Even he turned around and said that i just looked broken. Im waiting on a phone call about monday but i think we've decided to ask for a section. I just cant do it anymore. Will keep you ladies updated xxx