12-5-2009 - All I Can Do Is Hope

My mood while writing this blog: undesirable

Soooo.... Darius' "father" is finally on trail for his case. It started on Monday but I didn't go. I guess he doesn't have no one in the court room for him and his brother except their lawyer. His mother calls me sounding all sad because she can't go (she's on parole and can't leave the state). I personally didn't want to be involved or supportative because he wasn't there for OUR son. I don't want to invest any money into drving to Iowa for him, also I would have to drag my kids with me. That's too much trouble for some one who left me high and dry!

This case is SUCH a big mess! He is facing SO many charges that it ain't even funny! He even made the local news and newspaper... Here is a link to the article... (His name is Douglas)

http://qctimes.com/news/local/article_bd07d65a-3e87-11de-a0df-001cc4c002e0.html

I have not heard from him in a while. He asked me to set up a prepaid service on my phone so we can talk. In return I sent him 50 pictures of his son and a letter saying how I can't afford to put money on my phone to talk to him because I'm taking care of OUR son that we made together all alone. He had the chance to come visit and talk on the phone to his son when ever he wanted for FREE but he made the decision not to!

I also made sure to tell him that I wouldn't send him a penny with a hole in it... so dont ask! AND that i wouldn't even spit on him if he was on fire!

That's so crazy to me how he can just up and say that Darius' isn't his son anymore. We made the decision to have him TOGETHER so there's no reason why I should be in this all alone!

I guess all I can is "hope" that he deosn't get alot of time. Now he claims that it's a wrap and he's getting legit! If I recall correctly he looked me in my eyes and told he that he would NEVER get legit because it never pays out! I don't believe him for one second. If he's not going to be locked away for the rest of his natural born life I can guarantee that he's going to be back in the streets! Either way it goes I don't plan on being around to find out. I'm tired of always being caught up in some mess. How am I going to explain this to my son when he turns 5 years old and asks where is daddy is? Right now he doesn't know his father from who shot john. Before he would cry when ever his dad left... now he just another face in the crowd.