15-6-2009 - Focusing on me

My mood while writing this blog: motivated

Hello Ladies!

This will be my last blog probably for a while. DH is off on deployment so we will not be TTC for a while. And after losing baby #4 I just need a break from thinking about babies and pregnancies and hormone numbers and what not. I am still bleeding as a result of my most recent m/c. I keep thinking that I should be done but then I pass a huge clot and for the rest of the day I am still bleeding bright red. I am trying to keep active to be sure I pass everything... I mean jogging always helped when I got AF so I hope it will help speed up all this.

I plan on taking the time that Brian is gone and using it to better myself. I bought the Wii Active game to try because I couldnt decide on another at home work out video... I have to say that I was impressed by the intensity and amount of fun I had while DEFINATLY burning some calories. If you are thinking about getting Wii Fit or another work out game for Wii, I SO recomend you try Active. I have the next few months to get my body back and to get completely healthy all over. I have started a fast to cleanse myself but I will only be fasting for a couple of days, I am sure I will do a better fast later but I have a lunch date on Wednesday and I am so going to have a Chicken Salad Pita! I just want to cleanse my whole life... I guess really I just want to start over.

My doctor has been pretty supportive and is willing to do anything to help Brian and I become parents. There are really only two more things to test for and since Brian is away we may not be able to do the chromosone check but I am still looking into that. The doc on the boat said he would draw the blood and send it so maybe we will go with that. The only other test is the HSG. From what I have read and what the dr told me they will put a catheture type thing into my uterus and inject it with dye. They typically do this test to watch the dye go through the tubes to ensure the tubes arent blocked, which we all know is NOT my problem as we get pregnant very easily. So instead they are going to take xrays to check for an abnormality in the lining and shape of my uterus. They have to do this a week after AF so when I get AF (in 4-5 weeks hopefully!) I will email the dr and he will schedule the procedure. He says there is some discomfort but I will be awake and not given anything. My friend said that it hurts more afterward than it does during. The dr said if we do see an abnormality then they will put me under and use a camera to see the extent of the abnormality and if it is something they can fix.

So that is where we are now. I am taking a break and I am sad to do so because I love you all so much and I am so happy to have gotten to know you all. I wont be gone forever because I know I wont be able to resist checking in on everyone. But for now I will be having nothing but me time! If you want to keep in touch with me you can still message me and I will get back to you when and if I log on. I will be back to update you all on the results of the HSG. I am hoping that I will be back officially sometime in early winter. Good Luck ladies, baby dust to you all!