Because I have a lot of people that I'm inviting to my shower that have bad blood between them and a lot of people who don't know eachother, and my friends come from all ends of the spectrum, I was thinking that a conventional shower is just not the way to go. When you think of a conventional shower it's always a big room or back yard and everyone brings something to eat in crockpots and platters as well as a gift. Often times people are sitting in folding chairs that have to be rented and are uncomfortable and are generally in a big circle making awkward conversation with the person sitting next to them that they may or may not know. (This is all if the shower has as diverse a population as mine will. Generally if everyone knows eachother it's much less awkward and it's a great time to get everyone together to catch up, etc.)
The food people bring to showers generally cost them a certain amount of money to make so as to make it in bulk for the pot luck aspect. And it's almost a guarantee that they will have to take all the left overs with them. Unless they leave the left overs with the mother to be, in which case now her fridge is overburdened (it's often many people do decide to leave the left overs) and her responsibility to wash and return the dishes to the proper people if she remembers who's is who's. On a personal note I generally dislike potluck foods, I feel like it's either a crockpot filled with meatballs, ketchup and grape jelly or some sort of "salad" with mayonnaise in it. And it's great if other people like it, but I end up just eating random veggies, a few chips and finger sandwich that is generally just ham and cheese if they offer it. Oh and the tiny brownie square. And then I would be stuck with a fridge filled with mayonnaise smelling food that has exactly 48hrs before it all goes bad at once, and it will because I won't eat it, and Justin is only one man, haha.
I'm not trying to bash on traditional showers, they work out great for lots of people. And if I liked all the food, and everyone knew eachother and there wasn't such bad blood between some it would be the ideal celebration. Of course we'd have to find a place to hold it because no one in my family has a big enough place, but I'm sure if it was what I wanted we would figure it out.
I'm proposing instead, a Lady's Lunch. No guys allowed for two reasons: 1. it cuts down on seating and 2. we've all seen the glazed over look guys get when someone holds up a onsie. They don't want to be there generally but are just putting on a good face because if they are there they love you in some way or another and want you to be happy. And quite honestly, if I'm going to have fun with all my female friends and spend 2 or 3 hours laughing and having fun why shouldn't they? So I propose that they get the afternoon off to do whatever and not be stuck at my shower.
We would call ahead to an affordable restaurant that has a decent back room and reserve it. When I tell them how many people will be in attendance they will just think of tips and probably not ask me to rent it, but if they do, I think it's a small price to pay. Everyone can order their own entree and there will be a large table for people to sit around. If people are uncomfortable they can always concentrate on their food. An entree where I'm thinking would probably be around $10 or so depending on what you get, which often times is how much it costs to make something in bulk and then at the end of it people aren't stuck lugging a ton of food home, just their to-go box if they choose. There would be a table with gifts and I'm sure the restaurant wouldn't mind me taking the time to open them there because of all the money they'll get in tips + if they have me rent the room. No one has to stick behind for cleanup, no one has to remember who brought what, no one has to stress the night before making something. We can just sit down to a nice meal together (that everyone will like, because it's what they ordered) and catch up. Talk about girlie things that generally guys smile and nod to while they are really thinking about something else.
My mom said that I was being selfish because I would be having to ask people to buy their own food, because the cost would be just too much for me to take. She believes that paying $10 or so would be more money than throwing something together the night before. Personally I would rather spend $10 on a meal that I didn't have to cook, carry around, and clean up after. But ultimately she said that it was selfish of me to ask that of people and that we should just stick to the conventional shower. So I'm posing the question to you, what do you think? Am I being rude? How do you think people will react to it?