| girlinterrupted | |
| girlinterrupted has 21 days to go and is now in week 37 | |
 | Age: 37 Country: UK Province/region: Northamptonshire City: Corby Partner: Mark Children: Yes, 2 Pregnant: Yes Due date: 09 Mar ,2012 Occupation: SAHM |
| Online: 4 days ago. Last updated: 527 days ago. Member since: 1352 days | |
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15 Comments on The worst week of my life
bexstarr01 - Friday, 11 Sep
i had read passing comments from you about Finley but didnt know your story behind so i hope you dont mind me reading this now. i am sorry to hear people judged you. in the same situation i would have done the same. you looked passed your own reasons and thought about who was important...Finley. he will be grateful and has a great place by God now doing an important job. with love to you, your husband and ur angel. Becky xx
fruitful - Monday, 10 Aug
Girl, I am so sorry for your pain and devastation!
em2 stewarts wife - Sunday, 9 Aug
Jayne, we are all here for you when you are ready and need us! I can only imagine how difficult it was for you to make this choice, but again I know that it is the right choice! My cousin Alexis had something similar and her parents kept her alive and because of her heart problem she had brain issues and she went through countless surgeries and so much pain.... too much pain for someone so small. She passed away when she was 7 and everyday of her life before then was miserable. If anyone tells you that you are selfish trust me, THEY ARE WRONG! Selfish would be to put your child through hell. We all love you so very much! Please let me know if you need anything.
emski - Thursday, 6 Aug
I am so so sorry to hear this. I can't stop crying myself so can't imagine how hard it is for you. I will be thinking of you on tomorrow and sending you all my love. Stay strong. Emma xxxxx
clange - Thursday, 6 Aug
No one has the right to judge you.. You are the only one who truly understands how you feel. I am truly sorry for what you are going through. I hope you know God is with you through this time. And your baby will be with him in heaven waiting to meet you one day. What I have gone through doesn't even compare but, I had two miscarriages and knowing that my babies are in heaven and I will meet them one day brings me comfort.
SarahBeth13 - Thursday, 6 Aug
I am so very very sorry for what you are going through. This must be such a hard decision and I do not wish that upon anyone and would never in my life think of this decision you have made as selfish or anything but loving and kind to not want to put an angel through that pain. I wish there was something I could say or do to help you but I know there is not. I wish you strength and peace and love at this incredibly difficult time and anyone who wants to be rude or mean should really pray they are never put in the same position. I am just so very sorry.
RainbowRach - Thursday, 6 Aug
oh Jayne. I dont have any words that seem adequate right now. I am just so sorry. I am sat here with tears streaming down my face, life just seems so unfair.The decision you have made must have been so so difficult, but its your decision (and your DH of course) no-one elses. Ignore the ridiculous comments, they are not worth spending time or energy on, you have so much on your plate right now, you dont need that.I wish you all the best for Friday, there is no denying it, its going to be the worst day of your life but you will get through it and one day you will be able to smile again. In the meantime, I am here for you. Whatever you need, please just ask.Much love to you and your family during this horribly difficult time. You are in mine and my DHs thoughts.Rach x
Nettab - Thursday, 6 Aug
Hi! I think you are extremly brave. You have made the right diccision nobody want to see there children in pain and suffering he will be next to God and with no pain. I am praying for you and your family! Good luck hun! Lots of love Jean
AyLa 0327 - Wednesday, 5 Aug
You dont know me but i heard about your story in the TTC forum. First i want to say that im so sorry that you have to go through this i know its not easy but i think you made the right decision. Just like every other mother you don't want your child to suffer or hurt. I of all people understand how you feel i lost my baby girl when she was 80 days old on june 16,2009 she died of positional asphyxia in her sleep. So i feel your pain hun it's never easy to lose your child, and i will keep you in my prayers may god bless you with another successful and healthy pregnancy, and if you need to talk you know where to find me.
shawshoo - Wednesday, 5 Aug
I'm so sorry hun. My heart is breaking for you. I wish there was something that I could do to make you feel better, but I know there's not. So just know that I am here if you need me. As far as people making ignorant comments, screw them. If they can't support you, then they shouldn't comment.
youngmama - Wednesday, 5 Aug
I am so sorry, I know you don't know me and we have never spoke but I just have to say how horrible it was for someone to call you that. I am sure it wasn't an easy decision and after reading your stories about everything that you have been through how painful this must have been for you. Loosing a child is painful no matter what and I'm sure you did what is best for your son, you made the most unselfish sacrifice by keeping the child from a life of pain and letting him go with God. I will keep you in my prayers and I truly mean that, you must be a strong woman and I hope that in time you can begin to heal.
mugs - Wednesday, 5 Aug
I am in tears as I write this....I am so sorry you have to go through this. I simply cannot imagine the pain and sorrow you must feel. I am sorry for the closed minded people who have judged you during this time as well. I have to say, I am, in most cases, pro-life and a strong advocate against abortion but you are so right when you said you hope those people who judged you are never in your situation. Do not doubt your decision. It is the right one for you and, I believe what I would do in the same place. I can tell from your words how much you love your son and are doing this out of love-anyone who doesn't see that is blind. You have given your son a wonderful 21 weeks of life inside you and he will certainly live on in a place where his condition will not hurt him. Please know I will continue to keep you and your whole family and your little boy in my thoughts and prayers. Make sure to hold him as long as you want when he is born and stay strong-sending you much love...Megan
sheework - Wednesday, 5 Aug
My heart aches for you and your family. You are thinking of him and keeping him perfect. Forget those who want to judge or send negative comments you know what is right for you and your family. I know this decision didn't come easy for you and I hope you can find strength in knowing you have tons of women on here who support you 100%! I am one of them.
firsttimer - Wednesday, 5 Aug
Jayne, I KNOW how much you want to keep him, and so do you. Don't ever give these horrible people time of day. I've been on the same journey as you, and I know how much this baby means to you. I hope I never have to make such a decision as you have had to do. Medicine may advance quickly, but your son is not the one to help with these advances, he is a real person, whose mummy cares too much to let him suffer. I will be thinking about you this weekend, and I hope you get to spend some time with him when he is born. I cried genuine tears for you and your baby tonight, once again I am so, so sorry this has happened. Jan xx
cleebel - Wednesday, 5 Aug
Hi. I am at a loss for words. I cant imagine what you are going through. My heart hurts to read your honest words. Im sorry they could not have found this sooner, I know how involved and attached you can become in 20 weeks. Stay strong, you are in my prayers, and I hope that you will remain sure of yourself as you recover from this ordeal. I hope my words are not offensive, I truley mean to be empathetic. I commend your honesty and your stregnth, let no one judge you until they have been in your place. God bless you and your son, and again Im so sorry for your loss.
| 05-8-2009 - The worst week of my life |  My mood while writing this blog:devastated |
Well as most of you know I have had a horrible week.
I would like to start by saying that I am really grateful for all the support I have received and to those that have judged me - I hope you are never in this situation.
We had the 20 week scan on monday and they detected a problem with my sons heart. They arranged an appointment with a fetal heart specialist at Guys and St Thomas hospital in London for tuesday. The news wasn't good! My boy has Critical Aortic Stenosis and Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. This means that the left side of his heart is not working and the left ventricle is tiny. Both the top and bottom valves on the left side are extremely narrow and will not work when he is born, this would require extensive open heart surgery at 1-2 days old, if he survived (and the odds are against him) he would need further open heart surgery at 3 and 5. Then a heart and lung transplant as a teenager. Having looked this up online we found that most of these children spend their first year in hospital and are on the transplant list before their 1st birthdays.
We have made the very difficult decision to end the pregnancy, if this makes me selfish and a baby killer as one lovely lady suggested then fair enough but I have made this choice for the sake of my son. I do not want him to spend his whole life in pain and suffering.
I understand why people are urging me to get a second opinion but there is no where else to go - we have seen the best.
Today I took the first set of tablets and will go back to hospital on friday to deliver my son, this will be the hardest thing I have ever done. I want so much to keep him but that is the wrong thing for my son. People have said that medicine advances quickly and I should give him a chance but they have said his condition is 10/10 on how bad it could be - what choice do I have?
Thank you all for your comments and love
Jayne xx
15 Comments on The worst week of my life
bexstarr01 - Friday, 11 Sep
i had read passing comments from you about Finley but didnt know your story behind so i hope you dont mind me reading this now. i am sorry to hear people judged you. in the same situation i would have done the same. you looked passed your own reasons and thought about who was important...Finley. he will be grateful and has a great place by God now doing an important job. with love to you, your husband and ur angel. Becky xx
fruitful - Monday, 10 Aug
Girl, I am so sorry for your pain and devastation!
em2 stewarts wife - Sunday, 9 Aug
Jayne, we are all here for you when you are ready and need us! I can only imagine how difficult it was for you to make this choice, but again I know that it is the right choice! My cousin Alexis had something similar and her parents kept her alive and because of her heart problem she had brain issues and she went through countless surgeries and so much pain.... too much pain for someone so small. She passed away when she was 7 and everyday of her life before then was miserable. If anyone tells you that you are selfish trust me, THEY ARE WRONG! Selfish would be to put your child through hell. We all love you so very much! Please let me know if you need anything.
emski - Thursday, 6 Aug
I am so so sorry to hear this. I can't stop crying myself so can't imagine how hard it is for you. I will be thinking of you on tomorrow and sending you all my love. Stay strong. Emma xxxxx
clange - Thursday, 6 Aug
No one has the right to judge you.. You are the only one who truly understands how you feel. I am truly sorry for what you are going through. I hope you know God is with you through this time. And your baby will be with him in heaven waiting to meet you one day. What I have gone through doesn't even compare but, I had two miscarriages and knowing that my babies are in heaven and I will meet them one day brings me comfort.
SarahBeth13 - Thursday, 6 Aug
I am so very very sorry for what you are going through. This must be such a hard decision and I do not wish that upon anyone and would never in my life think of this decision you have made as selfish or anything but loving and kind to not want to put an angel through that pain. I wish there was something I could say or do to help you but I know there is not. I wish you strength and peace and love at this incredibly difficult time and anyone who wants to be rude or mean should really pray they are never put in the same position. I am just so very sorry.
RainbowRach - Thursday, 6 Aug
oh Jayne. I dont have any words that seem adequate right now. I am just so sorry. I am sat here with tears streaming down my face, life just seems so unfair.The decision you have made must have been so so difficult, but its your decision (and your DH of course) no-one elses. Ignore the ridiculous comments, they are not worth spending time or energy on, you have so much on your plate right now, you dont need that.I wish you all the best for Friday, there is no denying it, its going to be the worst day of your life but you will get through it and one day you will be able to smile again. In the meantime, I am here for you. Whatever you need, please just ask.Much love to you and your family during this horribly difficult time. You are in mine and my DHs thoughts.Rach x
Nettab - Thursday, 6 Aug
Hi! I think you are extremly brave. You have made the right diccision nobody want to see there children in pain and suffering he will be next to God and with no pain. I am praying for you and your family! Good luck hun! Lots of love Jean
AyLa 0327 - Wednesday, 5 Aug
You dont know me but i heard about your story in the TTC forum. First i want to say that im so sorry that you have to go through this i know its not easy but i think you made the right decision. Just like every other mother you don't want your child to suffer or hurt. I of all people understand how you feel i lost my baby girl when she was 80 days old on june 16,2009 she died of positional asphyxia in her sleep. So i feel your pain hun it's never easy to lose your child, and i will keep you in my prayers may god bless you with another successful and healthy pregnancy, and if you need to talk you know where to find me.
shawshoo - Wednesday, 5 Aug
I'm so sorry hun. My heart is breaking for you. I wish there was something that I could do to make you feel better, but I know there's not. So just know that I am here if you need me. As far as people making ignorant comments, screw them. If they can't support you, then they shouldn't comment.
youngmama - Wednesday, 5 Aug
I am so sorry, I know you don't know me and we have never spoke but I just have to say how horrible it was for someone to call you that. I am sure it wasn't an easy decision and after reading your stories about everything that you have been through how painful this must have been for you. Loosing a child is painful no matter what and I'm sure you did what is best for your son, you made the most unselfish sacrifice by keeping the child from a life of pain and letting him go with God. I will keep you in my prayers and I truly mean that, you must be a strong woman and I hope that in time you can begin to heal.
mugs - Wednesday, 5 Aug
I am in tears as I write this....I am so sorry you have to go through this. I simply cannot imagine the pain and sorrow you must feel. I am sorry for the closed minded people who have judged you during this time as well. I have to say, I am, in most cases, pro-life and a strong advocate against abortion but you are so right when you said you hope those people who judged you are never in your situation. Do not doubt your decision. It is the right one for you and, I believe what I would do in the same place. I can tell from your words how much you love your son and are doing this out of love-anyone who doesn't see that is blind. You have given your son a wonderful 21 weeks of life inside you and he will certainly live on in a place where his condition will not hurt him. Please know I will continue to keep you and your whole family and your little boy in my thoughts and prayers. Make sure to hold him as long as you want when he is born and stay strong-sending you much love...Megan
sheework - Wednesday, 5 Aug
My heart aches for you and your family. You are thinking of him and keeping him perfect. Forget those who want to judge or send negative comments you know what is right for you and your family. I know this decision didn't come easy for you and I hope you can find strength in knowing you have tons of women on here who support you 100%! I am one of them.
firsttimer - Wednesday, 5 Aug
Jayne, I KNOW how much you want to keep him, and so do you. Don't ever give these horrible people time of day. I've been on the same journey as you, and I know how much this baby means to you. I hope I never have to make such a decision as you have had to do. Medicine may advance quickly, but your son is not the one to help with these advances, he is a real person, whose mummy cares too much to let him suffer. I will be thinking about you this weekend, and I hope you get to spend some time with him when he is born. I cried genuine tears for you and your baby tonight, once again I am so, so sorry this has happened. Jan xx
cleebel - Wednesday, 5 Aug
Hi. I am at a loss for words. I cant imagine what you are going through. My heart hurts to read your honest words. Im sorry they could not have found this sooner, I know how involved and attached you can become in 20 weeks. Stay strong, you are in my prayers, and I hope that you will remain sure of yourself as you recover from this ordeal. I hope my words are not offensive, I truley mean to be empathetic. I commend your honesty and your stregnth, let no one judge you until they have been in your place. God bless you and your son, and again Im so sorry for your loss.
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18-7-2011 - Pregnant again
08-9-2010 - 2 months on
21-6-2010 - Induction date
10-6-2010 - 35 weeks
12-5-2010 - 31 weeks
27-4-2010 - 4D scan #2
14-4-2010 - 27 weeks
16-3-2010 - Todays heart scan
04-3-2010 - Such relief
17-2-2010 - 19 weeks
02-2-2010 - So happy :)
28-1-2010 - What a month!!
04-1-2010 - Mixed Emotions
03-1-2010 - Ultrasound tomorrow
11-12-2009 - Scan dates and due dates
19-11-2009 - Scared
04-11-2009 - Autopsy results
08-10-2009 - Finleys funeral
06-10-2009 - Feeling so sad
30-9-2009 - Moving on, hopefully!
25-9-2009 - D&C number 5, WTF!!!
08-9-2009 - D&C number 4!!
31-8-2009 - Light a candle for Finley
14-8-2009 - Finley
05-8-2009 - The worst week of my life
30-7-2009 - Scan on monday
12-6-2009 - Baby Oliver
11-6-2009 - Scan date
07-6-2009 - Apologies
29-4-2009 - OMG baby has a heartbeat
09-4-2009 - Happy but scared
10-2-2009 - My due date
17-9-2008 - Got to have another op
01-8-2008 - Another missed miscarriage
18-7-2011 - Pregnant again
08-9-2010 - 2 months on
21-6-2010 - Induction date
10-6-2010 - 35 weeks
12-5-2010 - 31 weeks
27-4-2010 - 4D scan #2
14-4-2010 - 27 weeks
16-3-2010 - Todays heart scan
04-3-2010 - Such relief
17-2-2010 - 19 weeks
02-2-2010 - So happy :)
28-1-2010 - What a month!!
04-1-2010 - Mixed Emotions
03-1-2010 - Ultrasound tomorrow
11-12-2009 - Scan dates and due dates
19-11-2009 - Scared
04-11-2009 - Autopsy results
08-10-2009 - Finleys funeral
06-10-2009 - Feeling so sad
30-9-2009 - Moving on, hopefully!
25-9-2009 - D&C number 5, WTF!!!
08-9-2009 - D&C number 4!!
31-8-2009 - Light a candle for Finley
14-8-2009 - Finley
05-8-2009 - The worst week of my life
30-7-2009 - Scan on monday
12-6-2009 - Baby Oliver
11-6-2009 - Scan date
07-6-2009 - Apologies
29-4-2009 - OMG baby has a heartbeat
09-4-2009 - Happy but scared
10-2-2009 - My due date
17-9-2008 - Got to have another op
01-8-2008 - Another missed miscarriage
Agenda
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