| henrysmum | |
 | Age: 34 Country: UK Province/region: England City: London Partner: Yup Children: Yes, 3 Pregnant: No Occupation: LG |
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Well!!! Here we are. On the other side. I haven't written anything since my baby was born at the beginning of April. I have been adjusting to my new life. I don't know about anyone else, but within hours of giving birth, it is difficult to imagine what you did before your baby and hard to imagine life without them. The idea of just having the 2 children to look after, now seems far too easy, when actually I remember getting quite fraught at times. I guess when another is added to the batch you just operate on a lower level of self expectation.
Anyway, I am very please with my new baby girl and am chuffed to be predominantly 'a mother of girls'. I have enjoyed my older daughter very much and been able to partake in her girliness and I look forward to being able to relate to this little bundle. Don't get me wrong, I adore my son and love watching him grow and change, but his interests are my husbands domaine. They are peas in a pod, and spend a lot of time in their joint interests. I like buying dolls houses, dollys and princess accessories, but haven't a clue when it comes to boys!!! My interest wains, I'm afraid!!
As I said, here we are 'on the other side'. That is one thing that I can never quite get my head around. Our babies have been with us for months....in the same room....living in the same house....having baths with us....going out shopping with us...even going to work with us.........yet they have been in a totally different dimension. They have been centimeters away from our fingers when we touch our tummies.......... I find that all a bit strange. We have all grown little humans out of seeds. Then we have to go through the most extreme agony imaginable to get them into our dimension......
Well, this was officially my very worst labour of the 3.
MY VERY LONG LABOUR STORY
On the 21st March, my husband, children and I were in the car driving towards a famous, neolythic stone circle somewhere in southern England (no you're thinking of the wrong one)....because it's my son's favouring place to go for a day out (and there's a pub in the middle of the circle, so it's good to combine with a pub lunch)....anyway, I'm going off at a tangent already.....fact is, I started contracting. I told my husband (ha ha) by holding on to the door handle and the front glove compartment and yelling "arghhhhhhhh". We agreed it might have been a twinge and continued. 10 minutes later the same thing happened. Again we decided to continue. After it had happened about five times my husband turned the car around and we set off for home. We needn't have because I didn't get another that day. I went home to bed hoping that they might kick off later...but they didn't.
This sort of thing happened several times over the following days. My friend, who is a midwife, was as convinced as me on each occasion. Then I would feel stupid because it would all stop. With my first 2 children, I had no 'false starts' so I felt confident that I knew what a proper contraction was....fact was, that this was all happening for a reason and it wasn't a particularly good reason.
My baby was due on the 25th March. That day came and went. On the 29th March I was given a sweep. The baby's head was in position and apparentently facing the right direction. My mum and I took up jogging which was possibly quite amusing to behold. I agreed to have a day off trying...1st April...no way I wanted a baby that day, so naturally that is the day I went into labour!!!!!
I had been very tired after a week of feeling relatively energetic. I went to see the midwife, who gave me another sweep. 2 hours later iiiiiiBANG!!!!!! I started contracting every 12 or so minutes. My mum and husband timed them and they kept on coming for 2 hours. This was definately it. We called the midwives to let them know and to ask what to do next. They said that they would not come out to me until I was having at least 2 contractions every 10 minutes and they were lasting about a minute. Well, fairly shortly, they were. I went upstairs and started to feel that I needed the midwives and the extra pain relief. My husband called for them to come out and they set off from 20 miles away. iiiiiiBANG!!!!!! they stopped. I was furious. I felt so embarrassed when the midwives turned up because I was just a pregnant fat old bag. They examined me...I was 3-4cm..then they went back on their 20 mile journey home.
I went to bed, absolutely shattered, gutted and humiliated. About an hour later (1.30am) I was screaming in pain. My contractions were coming thick and fast and I was too embarrassed to call the mid wife. This was also when I stopped being able to sit or lay down. I spent the next 7 hours (with 2 brief intervals) standing, mainly at the corner of my bed.
My mum was great. (They called the midwives) She made the bizaar noises that were coming out of my mouth with me. I think it was almost like a wolf baying.....The mid wives arrived and gave me entonnox (which was just great), examined me and it is here that I think they started to fail me. (This has been confirmed by my doctor and the consultant at the hospital).
1) They said that this was going to be a long haul. (not exactly helpful)
2) After I had got through 2 cannisters of gas and air, they suddenly said that we were nearly out of it. I started
trying to limit my use when I was way beyond a time when I shood have had to.
One of the midwives suggested that I got in the bath. That was great and a good break as the contractions really died down. As I got out I felt a really desire to bear down. It was only fleeting but I did say what I felt. (I was not examined at all).
At 6am the midwives had me pushing....I kept saying it felt wrong...They just kept moving my position. All I wanted to do was stand at the corner of the bed and continue labouring and to have someone bring me some more entonnox so that I could relax....the midwives had just cancelled that order because they said I was going to give birth shortly. They kept telling me to push but I couldn't. With my previous children I couldn't help but push when I was ready. Now it didn't feel right.
Can't remember much that followed. All I know is that I was told not to push and that an ambulance had been called. I stood in the kitchen. My entonnox ran out and my children both saw me as I would never wish them too. The pain was indescribable and I had midwives fighting over who was going to accompany me to hospital (another 2 had turned up). The ambulance was there but we couldn't go because none of them wanted to go with me because they had f***d up and knew they were in for an ear bashing. So I continued to writhe around in pain whilst they sorted themselves out....Then I needed to push. The ambulance ride was the worst 25 minutes of my life. I was breathing entonnox continuously, being told not to push by some midwife who had clearly never been through labour herself. She said "can you breath fresh air between contractions or you will go fuzzy headed" FUZZY HEADED!!!!!!! I was not having any time between contractions. They were back to back and to make matters worse, my waters went and as I contracted I was pushing out more and more water and having to control myself enough not to push.
When I arrived at the hospital I was 6cm dilated. I had a malpresentation (why I had gone in and out of labour for days) and the consultant went mad. My husband heard the midwife defending herself that she had only got to me as the ambulance had. I had been told to push by two midwives when I wasn't ready and didn't want to and now I wasn't allowed to but my body had taken over. The next 3 hours are a haze of back to back agony while they started to sort me out for an epidural and then ceasarian. It seemed like there was so much paperwork to do and that took presidence.
At 10.55am, a midwife came into the room to offer everyone a cup of tea (who was dealing with me) and said in passing "anyone else notice that the head is out". All hell broke loose and my mother became hysterical. So suddenly I was allowed to push again but had been programmed not to. This fab head midwife who had been overseeing me shrieked at me (sending my mother even more hysterical). I had to turn everything on it's head and re-adjust myself to go with my body. Anyway, moments later my little bundle was born. My mother became hysterical again because she didn't cry and the lovely midwife lady gave her a rub (the baby, not my mum) and I was handed my baby girl.
My home midwife found stitching me up far too complicated. (I would have had to come to hospital just to get stitched up, even if I had made it for the home birth). The hospital midwife stitched me up.
This was the first labour where the pain has continued after the baby was out. With the others, the baby was born and apart from a sore bum, I was relatively comfortable. This time I felt like I'd been butchered from the waist down. A truely hideous experience. I am very grateful that my baby (who's heart beat remained constantly 150ish throughout the hideous labour (bless her) was healthy and that no harm seems to have come to her.
Comments on May 28th 2008
| 28-5-2008 - May 28th 2008 |  My mood while writing this blog:Ok |
Well!!! Here we are. On the other side. I haven't written anything since my baby was born at the beginning of April. I have been adjusting to my new life. I don't know about anyone else, but within hours of giving birth, it is difficult to imagine what you did before your baby and hard to imagine life without them. The idea of just having the 2 children to look after, now seems far too easy, when actually I remember getting quite fraught at times. I guess when another is added to the batch you just operate on a lower level of self expectation.
Anyway, I am very please with my new baby girl and am chuffed to be predominantly 'a mother of girls'. I have enjoyed my older daughter very much and been able to partake in her girliness and I look forward to being able to relate to this little bundle. Don't get me wrong, I adore my son and love watching him grow and change, but his interests are my husbands domaine. They are peas in a pod, and spend a lot of time in their joint interests. I like buying dolls houses, dollys and princess accessories, but haven't a clue when it comes to boys!!! My interest wains, I'm afraid!!
As I said, here we are 'on the other side'. That is one thing that I can never quite get my head around. Our babies have been with us for months....in the same room....living in the same house....having baths with us....going out shopping with us...even going to work with us.........yet they have been in a totally different dimension. They have been centimeters away from our fingers when we touch our tummies.......... I find that all a bit strange. We have all grown little humans out of seeds. Then we have to go through the most extreme agony imaginable to get them into our dimension......
Well, this was officially my very worst labour of the 3.
MY VERY LONG LABOUR STORY
On the 21st March, my husband, children and I were in the car driving towards a famous, neolythic stone circle somewhere in southern England (no you're thinking of the wrong one)....because it's my son's favouring place to go for a day out (and there's a pub in the middle of the circle, so it's good to combine with a pub lunch)....anyway, I'm going off at a tangent already.....fact is, I started contracting. I told my husband (ha ha) by holding on to the door handle and the front glove compartment and yelling "arghhhhhhhh". We agreed it might have been a twinge and continued. 10 minutes later the same thing happened. Again we decided to continue. After it had happened about five times my husband turned the car around and we set off for home. We needn't have because I didn't get another that day. I went home to bed hoping that they might kick off later...but they didn't.
This sort of thing happened several times over the following days. My friend, who is a midwife, was as convinced as me on each occasion. Then I would feel stupid because it would all stop. With my first 2 children, I had no 'false starts' so I felt confident that I knew what a proper contraction was....fact was, that this was all happening for a reason and it wasn't a particularly good reason.
My baby was due on the 25th March. That day came and went. On the 29th March I was given a sweep. The baby's head was in position and apparentently facing the right direction. My mum and I took up jogging which was possibly quite amusing to behold. I agreed to have a day off trying...1st April...no way I wanted a baby that day, so naturally that is the day I went into labour!!!!!
I had been very tired after a week of feeling relatively energetic. I went to see the midwife, who gave me another sweep. 2 hours later iiiiiiBANG!!!!!! I started contracting every 12 or so minutes. My mum and husband timed them and they kept on coming for 2 hours. This was definately it. We called the midwives to let them know and to ask what to do next. They said that they would not come out to me until I was having at least 2 contractions every 10 minutes and they were lasting about a minute. Well, fairly shortly, they were. I went upstairs and started to feel that I needed the midwives and the extra pain relief. My husband called for them to come out and they set off from 20 miles away. iiiiiiBANG!!!!!! they stopped. I was furious. I felt so embarrassed when the midwives turned up because I was just a pregnant fat old bag. They examined me...I was 3-4cm..then they went back on their 20 mile journey home.
I went to bed, absolutely shattered, gutted and humiliated. About an hour later (1.30am) I was screaming in pain. My contractions were coming thick and fast and I was too embarrassed to call the mid wife. This was also when I stopped being able to sit or lay down. I spent the next 7 hours (with 2 brief intervals) standing, mainly at the corner of my bed.
My mum was great. (They called the midwives) She made the bizaar noises that were coming out of my mouth with me. I think it was almost like a wolf baying.....The mid wives arrived and gave me entonnox (which was just great), examined me and it is here that I think they started to fail me. (This has been confirmed by my doctor and the consultant at the hospital).
1) They said that this was going to be a long haul. (not exactly helpful)
2) After I had got through 2 cannisters of gas and air, they suddenly said that we were nearly out of it. I started
trying to limit my use when I was way beyond a time when I shood have had to.
One of the midwives suggested that I got in the bath. That was great and a good break as the contractions really died down. As I got out I felt a really desire to bear down. It was only fleeting but I did say what I felt. (I was not examined at all).
At 6am the midwives had me pushing....I kept saying it felt wrong...They just kept moving my position. All I wanted to do was stand at the corner of the bed and continue labouring and to have someone bring me some more entonnox so that I could relax....the midwives had just cancelled that order because they said I was going to give birth shortly. They kept telling me to push but I couldn't. With my previous children I couldn't help but push when I was ready. Now it didn't feel right.
Can't remember much that followed. All I know is that I was told not to push and that an ambulance had been called. I stood in the kitchen. My entonnox ran out and my children both saw me as I would never wish them too. The pain was indescribable and I had midwives fighting over who was going to accompany me to hospital (another 2 had turned up). The ambulance was there but we couldn't go because none of them wanted to go with me because they had f***d up and knew they were in for an ear bashing. So I continued to writhe around in pain whilst they sorted themselves out....Then I needed to push. The ambulance ride was the worst 25 minutes of my life. I was breathing entonnox continuously, being told not to push by some midwife who had clearly never been through labour herself. She said "can you breath fresh air between contractions or you will go fuzzy headed" FUZZY HEADED!!!!!!! I was not having any time between contractions. They were back to back and to make matters worse, my waters went and as I contracted I was pushing out more and more water and having to control myself enough not to push.
When I arrived at the hospital I was 6cm dilated. I had a malpresentation (why I had gone in and out of labour for days) and the consultant went mad. My husband heard the midwife defending herself that she had only got to me as the ambulance had. I had been told to push by two midwives when I wasn't ready and didn't want to and now I wasn't allowed to but my body had taken over. The next 3 hours are a haze of back to back agony while they started to sort me out for an epidural and then ceasarian. It seemed like there was so much paperwork to do and that took presidence.
At 10.55am, a midwife came into the room to offer everyone a cup of tea (who was dealing with me) and said in passing "anyone else notice that the head is out". All hell broke loose and my mother became hysterical. So suddenly I was allowed to push again but had been programmed not to. This fab head midwife who had been overseeing me shrieked at me (sending my mother even more hysterical). I had to turn everything on it's head and re-adjust myself to go with my body. Anyway, moments later my little bundle was born. My mother became hysterical again because she didn't cry and the lovely midwife lady gave her a rub (the baby, not my mum) and I was handed my baby girl.
My home midwife found stitching me up far too complicated. (I would have had to come to hospital just to get stitched up, even if I had made it for the home birth). The hospital midwife stitched me up.
This was the first labour where the pain has continued after the baby was out. With the others, the baby was born and apart from a sore bum, I was relatively comfortable. This time I felt like I'd been butchered from the waist down. A truely hideous experience. I am very grateful that my baby (who's heart beat remained constantly 150ish throughout the hideous labour (bless her) was healthy and that no harm seems to have come to her.
Comments on May 28th 2008
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