15-1-2009 - Annoyed

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

What the heck is Marriage now days? I am so sick of BATTLEFIELD! My Husband plays that stupid Computer game too much and he doesn't think he does. Well, whe you become a 4 star genral on that game, HELLO DUH yeah u do! It is 2:16am I awoke from a weird pregnancy dream. H had to drop something off at a friends house around 11 that would only take 30 minutes. Well, it was a lot longer visit. He can NEVER tell his friends no! It isn't that freakin hard. I'm tired of his friends anyway. I've been very hormonal and wanting to fight and such. Yes my Husband has been helping out around the house and I appreciate it too. But, to be honest I don't feel like I used to towards him and I keep telling him we'll see how things workout after the baby is here. I'm just not happy and I don't really know what has caused this to happen except for what I told him a couple of weeks ago. I'm not going to get into details, but I'm about ready to bash in his freakin computer. I'm 34 weeks and ready to have this baby already! My son will be 1 years old on Saturday. I just got done doing some remodeling in the house so I'm nesting. Maybe its me, who knows. I'm just really annoyed with being Married right now. Could it be the computer game he plays so much? Can I be so annoyed and fed up with it that its ruening our marriage? He's 21 years old, he's not very mature ofcourse what guy is?! Anytime I hear someone getting married on tv or whatever, I always think No, don't! One of my husbands friends wants to get married and I told him do not, you need to wait because when you get married everything changes, the person changes. It's a lot of responsibility.

Went to the Dr today, everything looked good. I still weigh 191lbs. Baby's heartbeat is in the 140's. She did an ultrasound and I'm Head down for sure. The baby's head was measuring at 35w4d. Still just 1-2cm dilated. I go back next Wednesday. I physically want to be done with all this, my back hurts, can't sleep, hardly move, always tired and its hard to play with my son. Anywho hope all u ladies r doing good. I'm just going to pray to God for strength and for him to help me see things/life in a different way (positive way). OR TO OPEN MY HUSBANDS EYES AND QUIT PUTTING GAMING AND HIS FRIENDS FIRST!