| jamie | |
 | Age: 32 Country: US Province/region: Ohio City: Columbus Partner: husband Doug Children: Yes, 3 Pregnant: Not anymore Occupation: sahm |
| Online: 16 days ago. Last updated: 40 days ago. Member since: 760 days | |
| | Profile | Photos (32) | Children (3) | Blog (24) | Polls (10) | Agenda (0) | Comments added (406) | Notepad |
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6 Comments on My big secret
Danni74 - Tuesday, 1 Jul
I know that having your parent's approval is important, but you and your husband know what is best for your family. I don't know anyone who has babies because they can afford to. Keep going! LIke you said, they will be happy when you have another one.
HaileyC - Tuesday, 1 Jul
You shouldn't feel bad about wanting to bring another child into this world. It's your child, not your parents. Plus, I'm positive that your parents will be supportive when you do become pregnant, regardless of their thoughts. I understand how horrible it must feel not to have the support from your parents.... someone will always have something to say that you don't need to hear. but at least you have the website! We're here to support you! I know it's not the same, but it's something. You also have your husband, and he's the one that REALLY matters. So try not to feel bad :)
Also, 31 is not old at all! My sister had her 5th (and final) at 37.
meganh - Tuesday, 1 Jul
Hey Jamie, you know first of all, 31 is not too old to have another baby......many people are just starting families at that age. My husband is 36 and we are having our third. You know, I understand the financial hardships, because it is hard at times. But, in the end, I think that $ does not matter, our families do, and if you and your children want more children, then try. The fact that it is mentally and physically exhausting is something that is never going to change, but you seem to have a good head on your shoulders and know that it is the most important thing to you so it is worth it.......
kamo - Tuesday, 1 Jul
Hi Jamie, I understand how you feel about not having support from your family. My mom only had 2 kids and believe anything more is just a village, however, my husband still talks about having more after this one. His mom had 4 and even told me that since we will have one of each, that's perfect and we shouldn't have anymore. I think that maybe there's a reason that your parents aren't on full board that you may not be aware of. How many brothers and sisters do you have? If not too many, then maybe their just like my mom and feel anything more will just be a tribe. Whatever the number, maybe whatever challenges they faced, they don't want you to have to face them, so staring you away from another child might be the best strategy for them. Maybe they don't want you do be financially strapped just to stay above waters just to support your family. My parents always gave me the impression that they didn't want to become grandparents too quickly, but when I had my son, I don't know who spoiled them the most. Like you said, I think when you do have another, your parents will love them just like they love their other grandkids. Think of it, how would you approach the situation if you saw one of you kids in the same situation trying to have more kids on top of what they already have, knowing all the challenges they are already facing? Would you be 100% supportive knowing what could be the consequences? I think you and your hubbie should pray about it, and if you were meant to have another, you will. God will be there to carry your burden (weather it be financially or emotionally supportive) just like he's always been! Continue to keep your head up and be the strong independent woman that your parents taught you to be! They would appreciate it!
luckywhite - Tuesday, 1 Jul
you poor soul.. your parents have to realised you are living your life!!! its your life your family and they should be happy for you!!!
xx
minkymoo78 - Tuesday, 1 Jul
Hi I've just read your blog and can't believe your parents think 31 is too old to have a baby. I'm 30 and we are just starting out trying for a family. I plan to have at least 2 children and wouldn't mind if I fell pregnant in my late 30's. Nowadays I think more and more older women are having children. It is quite common. I feel for you about not having approval though. I am very close to my parents and if they didn't like something I was doing it would upset me. Do they know how much you want this 3rd child? Can you speak to them about it? Good luck with TTC anyway, how long have you been trying? I've been trying 19 months now with one miscarriage so I'm desperate to be pregnant again. Take Care and remember that as long as it's what you and your husband/partner want then that's all that matters
| 30-6-2008 - My big secret |  My mood while writing this blog:indifferent |
June 30-
Its like I have this huge secret drama going on. No one else knows how long we have been TTC but us,and a few of you here online. I mentioned it to my dad the other day and he freaked out and said I was too old. I'm 31. I have gotten my mom used to the idea of another child but she is not thrilled. She told me that 3 is a crowd. I know raising children is hard. Its the hardest thing I've ever done. They just take up so much time and energy, but I can't imagine my life without them. It is the only thing that I've ever done in my life that I felt I was good at, being a mom. I just feel like its what Im meant to do. My husband and I dont have much, and he works about 65 hours a week so I go at most of it alone. There are times when I really need a break, and usually I dont have anything left for my husband when he gets home, but I just take one look at my kids and know its worth it. My parents worry about the money and the toll it takes on me being with the kids day in and day out, but this is my life. This is what I want, so why do I feel so crappy about TTC. It just sucks when support is lacking. I can't be fully happy about trying to have another baby when my family does not approve. You figure by now I would have grown out of my parents need for approval, but I guess you never do. My parents adore my children. They are so in love with both of them that I know they will feel the same about another, I just wish it didnt feel so sneaky TTC another, and that my husband and I were not the only ones happy to see a positive pregnancy test( and my 4 year old son).
6 Comments on My big secret
Danni74 - Tuesday, 1 Jul
I know that having your parent's approval is important, but you and your husband know what is best for your family. I don't know anyone who has babies because they can afford to. Keep going! LIke you said, they will be happy when you have another one.
HaileyC - Tuesday, 1 Jul
You shouldn't feel bad about wanting to bring another child into this world. It's your child, not your parents. Plus, I'm positive that your parents will be supportive when you do become pregnant, regardless of their thoughts. I understand how horrible it must feel not to have the support from your parents.... someone will always have something to say that you don't need to hear. but at least you have the website! We're here to support you! I know it's not the same, but it's something. You also have your husband, and he's the one that REALLY matters. So try not to feel bad :)
Also, 31 is not old at all! My sister had her 5th (and final) at 37.
meganh - Tuesday, 1 Jul
Hey Jamie, you know first of all, 31 is not too old to have another baby......many people are just starting families at that age. My husband is 36 and we are having our third. You know, I understand the financial hardships, because it is hard at times. But, in the end, I think that $ does not matter, our families do, and if you and your children want more children, then try. The fact that it is mentally and physically exhausting is something that is never going to change, but you seem to have a good head on your shoulders and know that it is the most important thing to you so it is worth it.......
kamo - Tuesday, 1 Jul
Hi Jamie, I understand how you feel about not having support from your family. My mom only had 2 kids and believe anything more is just a village, however, my husband still talks about having more after this one. His mom had 4 and even told me that since we will have one of each, that's perfect and we shouldn't have anymore. I think that maybe there's a reason that your parents aren't on full board that you may not be aware of. How many brothers and sisters do you have? If not too many, then maybe their just like my mom and feel anything more will just be a tribe. Whatever the number, maybe whatever challenges they faced, they don't want you to have to face them, so staring you away from another child might be the best strategy for them. Maybe they don't want you do be financially strapped just to stay above waters just to support your family. My parents always gave me the impression that they didn't want to become grandparents too quickly, but when I had my son, I don't know who spoiled them the most. Like you said, I think when you do have another, your parents will love them just like they love their other grandkids. Think of it, how would you approach the situation if you saw one of you kids in the same situation trying to have more kids on top of what they already have, knowing all the challenges they are already facing? Would you be 100% supportive knowing what could be the consequences? I think you and your hubbie should pray about it, and if you were meant to have another, you will. God will be there to carry your burden (weather it be financially or emotionally supportive) just like he's always been! Continue to keep your head up and be the strong independent woman that your parents taught you to be! They would appreciate it!
luckywhite - Tuesday, 1 Jul
you poor soul.. your parents have to realised you are living your life!!! its your life your family and they should be happy for you!!!
xx
minkymoo78 - Tuesday, 1 Jul
Hi I've just read your blog and can't believe your parents think 31 is too old to have a baby. I'm 30 and we are just starting out trying for a family. I plan to have at least 2 children and wouldn't mind if I fell pregnant in my late 30's. Nowadays I think more and more older women are having children. It is quite common. I feel for you about not having approval though. I am very close to my parents and if they didn't like something I was doing it would upset me. Do they know how much you want this 3rd child? Can you speak to them about it? Good luck with TTC anyway, how long have you been trying? I've been trying 19 months now with one miscarriage so I'm desperate to be pregnant again. Take Care and remember that as long as it's what you and your husband/partner want then that's all that matters
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