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16 Comments on I need advice....
cabbage - Tuesday, 16 Jun
I have someone at work who is 8 weeks ahead but sounds very similar! Just do what you are comfortable with - it’s your pregnancy/ your baby and your body.
As for the 2nd deal sorry I have no idea!
But it looks like you now have plenty of advice.
welshgirl - Tuesday, 16 Jun
ok firstly sounds like your sister in law in jealous, your definately not doing things early your past the critical stage and everything is healthy. with my first i had the nursery decorated by the time i was 23 weeks although in the uk they stay in your bedroom til they are 6 months so it never got used other than for changing for about a year after i decorated it lol.
with regard to the 18 month old i know what your going through. My daughter is 21 months and has never slept through properly i did the controlled crying with her you leave them for 10 mins then go back in and then leave it 15 its not easy but it does work. Until now that is she has her back teeth coming through and she will not sleep its a nightmare! we try to get her to bed at 8.30pm-9pm sometimes we can but often we dont succeed til 10pm or later. She is often then awake again at 2am she only sleeps 1-2 hours during the day too but what i have found is if i take her for long walks where she is burning off energy that can sometimes help her sleep better. Could it be teething with your son? Also ive noticed she is more clingy recently im guessing she senses im pregnant or something. Also tv before bed ive noticed keeps her more awake we now turn off the tv at 7pm to try and get her to wind down a bit. We got a bedguard on her bed too which she hasnt yet attempted to climb over them to get out even though they arent that high not sure if this will help you but i so understand what your going through oh and no matter what time she goes to sleep she is stil up at 6am! its mad.
andy21 - Monday, 15 Jun
that is really mean of your sil, my hubby and i are planning on registering soon. we just haven’t had the time (i know it’ll be an all day thing lol) i’m 20 weeks and i’ve read in magazine articles and stuff that it’s a good time to register especially cuz you usually know the sex of the baby by now. and who cares when you have your shower?? lol my mom is going to throw me one on September, a month or 2 before my due date. you never know, the baby could come early. i feel like people who wait til the last minute are brave!! haha and i’m not sure what to tell you about your toddler, i haven’t experienced that yet =]
nickee - Monday, 15 Jun
Well I too am having sleeping issues with my little one so I am probably not the best person to give advice on that subject. But as for inlaws I am a pro. I deal with my difficult inlaws on a daily basis. It sounds to me like you SIL is really jealous and wants to steal the show from you. She also sounds like a know-it-all (which is just so annoying) You are doing everything right. It is good to be prepared early, not only that but it is so much fun. And how many chances are we going to have to do all this fun baby stuff?
Try not to let her get you down. And if at all possible avoid her. You dont need such negative people in your life. Surrond yourself with people that make you happy and feel good.
pens - Monday, 15 Jun
I think your sister in law is being pathetic! 29 weeks for a baby shower is NOT too early its normal she sounds like she wants to be centre of attention by making you feel bad about every step of your pregnancy.
Now the other kid you are having issues with I can only give advice..... the first thing I would say is stop letting him fall asleep before going to bed...... children need to learn to self soothe in order to sleep a full night through as if he wakes in the middle of th nit and is used to you soothing him to sleep he will need you to do the same thing during the night...... If you put him to bed awake and allow him o cry or get himself off to sleep he will larn self soothing therefore when he wakes any othertime he will be able to put himself back to sleep..... So yeah I know its hard I hated it when I first started it as I cant stand hearing my lil man cry its kills me but put himdown make sure he is full and clean nappy etc and let him go to sleep on his own...... let him cry and if you cant bear to hear it go outside for a breath of fresh air like I had to lol Its ahrd intitially but once they learn it it changes the child and they just go to sleep...... My other thing I would change would be his bed hours if you can........ bed by somewhere from 7-9 therefore he will wake anywhere from 6.30-8.30......... sleeping in as late as he is means he will nap later during the day and will need to go to bed later....... if you dont get him into bed by these type of hours you will never get you and hubby time which isnt healthy either.....also once baby is here gives you the evening to sort baby out for bed and feeding etc aswell......... this is really all I can say to try and help your situation...... Hope it does :) good luck chicky cheer up things will all come together and just ignore the sily SIL lol
morgn - Monday, 15 Jun
I don't think you are doing anything too early. We are going to work on the babies room the weekend of the 27th. I am like you I don't want to want till the last min and be huge and misrable trying to do it. I am having my baby shower about a month before my due date but everyone is different. My friend is having her's 2 months before her due date. I wouldn't worry about what she said.
lilmama4 - Monday, 15 Jun
i dont think you are doing things 2 early .i would just try not to think about what she said . you are a big girl she doesnt need to be telling you what to do and when.and congrats with your pregnancy glad everythings going ok .enjoy every min.
Navy Mommy 2009 - Monday, 15 Jun
Don't worry about your SIL. I know it's easier said than done, but tell her to back off! I finally stood up for myself yesterday. My 21 yr old Sister is pregnant so my pregnancy is compared to hers ALL the time! She's only gained 20 pounds and shes 7 1/2 months pregnant... Well woopdidoo! First of all I'm not 21, I'm almost 32 and she doesn't have the medical problems I have and she hasn't been on bed rest most of her pregnancy. Same with your SIL, she may experienced in pregnancy, but it gives her no right to scare you or lecture you on when you should have your baby shower. If she thinks it's weird, so what. Tell her you don't care what she thinks. I'm like you, I'm going to start Brendon's room in a few weeks and I'm only working on 20 weeks. I'm not in the exact same situation, but I can definitely relate. I started the pregnancy crying jag yesterday because everyone keeps commenting on my weight. AND, I wasn't very nice! So I'm thinking everyone will SHUT UP now:-) Try telling her how you feel and if she still doesn't back off, really let her have it. She has no idea what it's like to lose 4 babies and to FINALLY be able to carry one. You have every right to be excited. This is YOUR pregnancy, do it up how you want:-) BIG HUGS!!!!
excitedmisty (misty) - Monday, 15 Jun
Don't worry about the sister-in-law thing...mine is acting the same way...i honestly believe it is jealousy...she has 2 biological kids and a step-daugther and she is overwhelmed...she is VERY negative about everything...
We are switching from a doctor to a mid-wife and going to a birthing center instead and she is like Debbie Downer...she keeps telling me she think's it's a bad idea, esp since i have a low lying placenta, what if i need a c-section and i remind her that there are 30 doctors and 8 midwives in the practice and that i think i'll be fine...but she is critical from doctors to the stroller i registered for (and yes, i have registered too...and i lost a previous pregnancy) I think after losing a baby, and you make it this far you just get excited and want to be prepared! I'm with everyone else...SIL can be real poo heads...enjoy your moment and your pregnancy! August 8th is definately not too early for a shower!
jaydenty - Monday, 15 Jun
Oh and good luck. It took me 6 long, hard weeks to get to where we are now and I never ever thought that I would get here. Watching him cry for you is the saddest thing of all, cos he's still a baby and yet you've got to let go and let him be a big boy.....its so tough!
bethk - Monday, 15 Jun
Ur SIL is just being a jealous bitch. Maybe she feels OMG uve got this and that sorted out but she hasnt!? Every one is diferent, I leave everything til last minute and I had the same stick as u the otherway round ppl saying u leaving it too late bla bla bla... So there is no right or wrong!
U r entitled to have the baby shower when u want it! Last time i was prehgas there was loads of girls on here in my wk that had showers early!! Maybe shes jealous of the fact that u might have good friends to give u a good shower and she doesnt??
I have a friend who is a week further than me too and all she duz is compare EVERYTHING! We were pregbnant together last time but she lost that baby at a late late stage but she seems to think putting me down makes her look good even tho she's looking like the fool and EVERYONE is seeing it.
About ur 18mnth old, is there something in his room he doesnt like? Does he need some kind of comforting thing with him like music/a certain blanket/ etc... something that will make him want to be i nthe room. My SIL's LO was 17mnths old in her own room with her own grown up bed and to get her to want ot be in the room and stay there in the nights she let her LO choose the bedding and help decorate the room so she new it was her big grown up room for a big girl. We think their too young to understand things like that but its worked a treat for her. xx
jaydenty - Monday, 15 Jun
Firstly, dont let your sister in-law bother you. You do what feels right for YOU and she can do what feels right for her. You're not the same people, so why should you do the same things. She sounds really nasty and I would just ignore her.
With my son, I only started sleep training at 24 months and if you go on to Super Nanny's website, she has the whole routine thing on there and then you've got to put your chair next to his cot without looking at him. You start off by being pretty close to his cot, then slowly you will move out of the room until eventually he cant see you anymore, but he trusts that you're there and falls asleep on his own. They will cry and cry until they eventually cry themselves to sleep. My son cried for half an hour the first time he fell asleep on his own, it tiring and draining, so be prepared! Let him play AND sleep in his room during the day, cos if you dont, he will associate his room with sleeping only and you've got to make him feel comfortable in his room, and not make it seem like a "punishment" if you know what I mean. DO NOT pick him up and settle him, I think they're too old for that now. If yours is anything like mine, stubborn and hot headed, it could take a while, but its all worth it in the end, when you put them to bed and they just fall asleep on their own. Here is the link for the supernanny episode that I used: http://www.supernanny.co.uk/TV-Show/Clips/Clips/Sleep-Separation-Technique.aspx
mummy2beagain - Sunday, 14 Jun
about your sis inlaw..... i feel your pain, she is just jealous that you are happy. she probably can't do all the stuff that you are doing and she is just making you feel like crap so that she feels better. it sounds like classic schhol yard bullying.
About your 18 month....... when my son was little we had heaps of trouble getting him to sleep. we had a routine that was only for bedtime and was calming, Dinner, Bath, Book. We had to make the bedroom only for night time. I used to put him sleep in the toy room during the day or when we moved and didn't have the toy room i used to leave the cutains open in his room for day time sleeps and make the night time sleeps very dark so as to differentiate between night and day. At night we had to do the controlled crying thing. let him cry for a little while ((not too long so he gets to worked up and wont settle at all),they say not to let them cry for any more than 5-10 mins at each intervall.) then go in lie him back in bed without making any eye contact or speaking to him , then walk out. i used to stand at the door or just down the hall. each time you go back in leave it a little while longer. If he gets too worked up, you can tell when you've had enough and when he is past the point stop. take him out of the room and calm him down and don't put him back to bed until he is completly stettled down again. this technique is best used when only BOTH partners are in on it as it can get quite distressing. having the support of your partner makes this easier also they say that there is no point trying to do it on your own. you need to do it together. make sure that you are both in on it and that both of you know the rules to the technique. it may also take any where from a few nights to a week or so. the rewards are so great though. The idea is that he will eventually get the idea that you wont let him out just coz he crys but he also knows that you are only just around the corner if he really needs you. I hope this helps. I know that it worked for me and i also helped my friend do it with her first child and now she does it with all her little ones. She found that she couldn't do it on her own so i used to go over during the day and do it for her. it worked for us i hope it can help you!!! GOOD LUCK
duhnellie - Sunday, 14 Jun
I think any time now is ok to have a baby shower or do your baby's room. Planning to have a baby is exciting and I wish I had a bedroom to do for my new little one cause I would be fixing it up right now as well. I dont see anything wrong with what your are doing and what time you plan to do it. I think some people just criticize or think you are doing something weird or wrong when you are not doing it exactly the same as they did or are doing. Since she has had more babies she probably thinks she knows alittle more on how and when to do things when it really doesnt matter. Dont worry I dont see anything weird with what your doing at this time of your pregnancy. About your other dilima I hope somebody else has some good advice because I dont really know I cant remember how we did it with our son but we have been living with my husbands parents for almost a year and are moving in a couple weeks so he is going to have to get used to it again. I know he will cry but thats just where he needs to sleep. I hope everything is well and I hope you get the info you need.
AshRock - Sunday, 14 Jun
Hi,
I was having a lot of sleep problems with my 19 month old for a long time. I finally did some research and came up with a game plan and now my daughter goes to bed at 7:30 every night and wakes up between 6 and 7 every morning. Before this she wasn't going to sleep until 9 or 10 at night and I would have to hold her until she fell asleep. She would also wake up at least twice during the night and get up about 5 every morning. Here's what I did: I started putting her to bed 30 minutes earlier until we worked down to where we wanted to be. We gradually did this, it took about two weeks. I also needed to make her learn how to fall asleep on her own. The first two nights I put her to bed awake, but sleepy and she cried herself to sleep. She cried for about an hour both nights. It was hard, but well worth it in the end. After those two nights, she never cried again. So now she gets about 10 to 11 hours of sleep at night and usually takes about 2 hour nap from 9:30 to 11:30 every morning. Good luck and I hope some of this helps!
ShireeT - Sunday, 14 Jun
about your sis-in-law. ahe sounds like a poop. lol Sometimes ppl say stuff like that because they are trying to help protect you from getting hurt, especially where you have lost babies before, but it is important that you let her know these comments hurt. And you can have your baby shower as early as you freaking want to. :-)
About the toddler-bedtime situation, watch some episodes of Super Nanny where she explains to the parents how to deal with bedtime. You may need to tweak it slightly according to age, but all ages have the same basic strategies. Good Luck!
| 14-6-2009 - I need advice.... |  My mood while writing this blog:Confused... |
Ok All!!! Here are a few things that are on my mind.
I got a phone call tonight and it was my sister in law. She got a pic that I sent her of the nursery because we painted this weekend and put up chair rail. It looks absolutly amazing by the way... : ) But anyways she was saying how pretty the room was but didnt we think that we were doing stuff a little early? I was kinda confused. I just dont want to be that person thats last minute! I cannot handle that! I am working on 21 weeks. Well yesterday we went and registered at babies r us, target, and walmart. Well she said " i only registered at target and I wouldnt do it this early because of jinxing myself". That hurts my feelings because of what I have been through. I have lost 4 babies and been through multiple surgeries just to be able to carry this baby and now she has me scared out of my mind! Well she then went on to say "Why did you register? Are you going to have a shower?" ANd I told her YES, why wouldnt I. She then said " Geeeez I have never heard of someone having a shower this early. Well then I told her that its not until Aug 8th and I will be 29 weeks then. She said she didnt have her shower until 1 month before her second was born, and that having it that early was weird. Geeeez she makes me feel stupid. Am I having my shower to early? Have I jumped the gun? Why is she treating me this way? And to top things off, she is 2 weeks further along than me, so she is comparing EVERYTHING to her. Well this is my FIRST pregnancy (sort of) and her FORTH! So she acts like I am a child and that I just dont know what I am doing. PLEASE HELP!
Ok, so that is my first deal. Here is the other one. I have a 18 month old toddler, and we have been having sleeping problems. I cannot have this when Liam gets here. I will lose my mind. As soon as we get him to sleep we get him in his bed walk out of the room, and not 30 mins later hes screaming to come to our room. Well we had switched him to a toddler bed and he was walking out of his room and crawled into bed with us every night. That HAD to end. So we put the side of the crib back up. I need advice on what to do. Do I just let him cry? If so how long? I have a routine with him but he still doesnt fall alseep until midnight! He wakes about 9 in the morn takes a 1-2 hr nap during the day, and he eats dinner, has a bath, puts on his pjs, has a bedtime snack to fill up his belly with milk, either watches 1 tv show or we read 1 story and he just fights us to fall asleep. WHAT CAN WE DO? I JUST WANT TO CRY SOMETIMES WHEN HE DOES THIS! HELP!
Sry for needing all the advice. But you ladies are going through what I am and you understand. Thanks in advance!!!
Luvs!
16 Comments on I need advice....
cabbage - Tuesday, 16 Jun
I have someone at work who is 8 weeks ahead but sounds very similar! Just do what you are comfortable with - it’s your pregnancy/ your baby and your body.
As for the 2nd deal sorry I have no idea!
But it looks like you now have plenty of advice.
welshgirl - Tuesday, 16 Jun
ok firstly sounds like your sister in law in jealous, your definately not doing things early your past the critical stage and everything is healthy. with my first i had the nursery decorated by the time i was 23 weeks although in the uk they stay in your bedroom til they are 6 months so it never got used other than for changing for about a year after i decorated it lol.
with regard to the 18 month old i know what your going through. My daughter is 21 months and has never slept through properly i did the controlled crying with her you leave them for 10 mins then go back in and then leave it 15 its not easy but it does work. Until now that is she has her back teeth coming through and she will not sleep its a nightmare! we try to get her to bed at 8.30pm-9pm sometimes we can but often we dont succeed til 10pm or later. She is often then awake again at 2am she only sleeps 1-2 hours during the day too but what i have found is if i take her for long walks where she is burning off energy that can sometimes help her sleep better. Could it be teething with your son? Also ive noticed she is more clingy recently im guessing she senses im pregnant or something. Also tv before bed ive noticed keeps her more awake we now turn off the tv at 7pm to try and get her to wind down a bit. We got a bedguard on her bed too which she hasnt yet attempted to climb over them to get out even though they arent that high not sure if this will help you but i so understand what your going through oh and no matter what time she goes to sleep she is stil up at 6am! its mad.
andy21 - Monday, 15 Jun
that is really mean of your sil, my hubby and i are planning on registering soon. we just haven’t had the time (i know it’ll be an all day thing lol) i’m 20 weeks and i’ve read in magazine articles and stuff that it’s a good time to register especially cuz you usually know the sex of the baby by now. and who cares when you have your shower?? lol my mom is going to throw me one on September, a month or 2 before my due date. you never know, the baby could come early. i feel like people who wait til the last minute are brave!! haha and i’m not sure what to tell you about your toddler, i haven’t experienced that yet =]
nickee - Monday, 15 Jun
Well I too am having sleeping issues with my little one so I am probably not the best person to give advice on that subject. But as for inlaws I am a pro. I deal with my difficult inlaws on a daily basis. It sounds to me like you SIL is really jealous and wants to steal the show from you. She also sounds like a know-it-all (which is just so annoying) You are doing everything right. It is good to be prepared early, not only that but it is so much fun. And how many chances are we going to have to do all this fun baby stuff?
Try not to let her get you down. And if at all possible avoid her. You dont need such negative people in your life. Surrond yourself with people that make you happy and feel good.
pens - Monday, 15 Jun
I think your sister in law is being pathetic! 29 weeks for a baby shower is NOT too early its normal she sounds like she wants to be centre of attention by making you feel bad about every step of your pregnancy.
Now the other kid you are having issues with I can only give advice..... the first thing I would say is stop letting him fall asleep before going to bed...... children need to learn to self soothe in order to sleep a full night through as if he wakes in the middle of th nit and is used to you soothing him to sleep he will need you to do the same thing during the night...... If you put him to bed awake and allow him o cry or get himself off to sleep he will larn self soothing therefore when he wakes any othertime he will be able to put himself back to sleep..... So yeah I know its hard I hated it when I first started it as I cant stand hearing my lil man cry its kills me but put himdown make sure he is full and clean nappy etc and let him go to sleep on his own...... let him cry and if you cant bear to hear it go outside for a breath of fresh air like I had to lol Its ahrd intitially but once they learn it it changes the child and they just go to sleep...... My other thing I would change would be his bed hours if you can........ bed by somewhere from 7-9 therefore he will wake anywhere from 6.30-8.30......... sleeping in as late as he is means he will nap later during the day and will need to go to bed later....... if you dont get him into bed by these type of hours you will never get you and hubby time which isnt healthy either.....also once baby is here gives you the evening to sort baby out for bed and feeding etc aswell......... this is really all I can say to try and help your situation...... Hope it does :) good luck chicky cheer up things will all come together and just ignore the sily SIL lol
morgn - Monday, 15 Jun
I don't think you are doing anything too early. We are going to work on the babies room the weekend of the 27th. I am like you I don't want to want till the last min and be huge and misrable trying to do it. I am having my baby shower about a month before my due date but everyone is different. My friend is having her's 2 months before her due date. I wouldn't worry about what she said.
lilmama4 - Monday, 15 Jun
i dont think you are doing things 2 early .i would just try not to think about what she said . you are a big girl she doesnt need to be telling you what to do and when.and congrats with your pregnancy glad everythings going ok .enjoy every min.
Navy Mommy 2009 - Monday, 15 Jun
Don't worry about your SIL. I know it's easier said than done, but tell her to back off! I finally stood up for myself yesterday. My 21 yr old Sister is pregnant so my pregnancy is compared to hers ALL the time! She's only gained 20 pounds and shes 7 1/2 months pregnant... Well woopdidoo! First of all I'm not 21, I'm almost 32 and she doesn't have the medical problems I have and she hasn't been on bed rest most of her pregnancy. Same with your SIL, she may experienced in pregnancy, but it gives her no right to scare you or lecture you on when you should have your baby shower. If she thinks it's weird, so what. Tell her you don't care what she thinks. I'm like you, I'm going to start Brendon's room in a few weeks and I'm only working on 20 weeks. I'm not in the exact same situation, but I can definitely relate. I started the pregnancy crying jag yesterday because everyone keeps commenting on my weight. AND, I wasn't very nice! So I'm thinking everyone will SHUT UP now:-) Try telling her how you feel and if she still doesn't back off, really let her have it. She has no idea what it's like to lose 4 babies and to FINALLY be able to carry one. You have every right to be excited. This is YOUR pregnancy, do it up how you want:-) BIG HUGS!!!!
excitedmisty (misty) - Monday, 15 Jun
Don't worry about the sister-in-law thing...mine is acting the same way...i honestly believe it is jealousy...she has 2 biological kids and a step-daugther and she is overwhelmed...she is VERY negative about everything...
We are switching from a doctor to a mid-wife and going to a birthing center instead and she is like Debbie Downer...she keeps telling me she think's it's a bad idea, esp since i have a low lying placenta, what if i need a c-section and i remind her that there are 30 doctors and 8 midwives in the practice and that i think i'll be fine...but she is critical from doctors to the stroller i registered for (and yes, i have registered too...and i lost a previous pregnancy) I think after losing a baby, and you make it this far you just get excited and want to be prepared! I'm with everyone else...SIL can be real poo heads...enjoy your moment and your pregnancy! August 8th is definately not too early for a shower!
jaydenty - Monday, 15 Jun
Oh and good luck. It took me 6 long, hard weeks to get to where we are now and I never ever thought that I would get here. Watching him cry for you is the saddest thing of all, cos he's still a baby and yet you've got to let go and let him be a big boy.....its so tough!
bethk - Monday, 15 Jun
Ur SIL is just being a jealous bitch. Maybe she feels OMG uve got this and that sorted out but she hasnt!? Every one is diferent, I leave everything til last minute and I had the same stick as u the otherway round ppl saying u leaving it too late bla bla bla... So there is no right or wrong!
U r entitled to have the baby shower when u want it! Last time i was prehgas there was loads of girls on here in my wk that had showers early!! Maybe shes jealous of the fact that u might have good friends to give u a good shower and she doesnt??
I have a friend who is a week further than me too and all she duz is compare EVERYTHING! We were pregbnant together last time but she lost that baby at a late late stage but she seems to think putting me down makes her look good even tho she's looking like the fool and EVERYONE is seeing it.
About ur 18mnth old, is there something in his room he doesnt like? Does he need some kind of comforting thing with him like music/a certain blanket/ etc... something that will make him want to be i nthe room. My SIL's LO was 17mnths old in her own room with her own grown up bed and to get her to want ot be in the room and stay there in the nights she let her LO choose the bedding and help decorate the room so she new it was her big grown up room for a big girl. We think their too young to understand things like that but its worked a treat for her. xx
jaydenty - Monday, 15 Jun
Firstly, dont let your sister in-law bother you. You do what feels right for YOU and she can do what feels right for her. You're not the same people, so why should you do the same things. She sounds really nasty and I would just ignore her.
With my son, I only started sleep training at 24 months and if you go on to Super Nanny's website, she has the whole routine thing on there and then you've got to put your chair next to his cot without looking at him. You start off by being pretty close to his cot, then slowly you will move out of the room until eventually he cant see you anymore, but he trusts that you're there and falls asleep on his own. They will cry and cry until they eventually cry themselves to sleep. My son cried for half an hour the first time he fell asleep on his own, it tiring and draining, so be prepared! Let him play AND sleep in his room during the day, cos if you dont, he will associate his room with sleeping only and you've got to make him feel comfortable in his room, and not make it seem like a "punishment" if you know what I mean. DO NOT pick him up and settle him, I think they're too old for that now. If yours is anything like mine, stubborn and hot headed, it could take a while, but its all worth it in the end, when you put them to bed and they just fall asleep on their own. Here is the link for the supernanny episode that I used: http://www.supernanny.co.uk/TV-Show/Clips/Clips/Sleep-Separation-Technique.aspx
mummy2beagain - Sunday, 14 Jun
about your sis inlaw..... i feel your pain, she is just jealous that you are happy. she probably can't do all the stuff that you are doing and she is just making you feel like crap so that she feels better. it sounds like classic schhol yard bullying.
About your 18 month....... when my son was little we had heaps of trouble getting him to sleep. we had a routine that was only for bedtime and was calming, Dinner, Bath, Book. We had to make the bedroom only for night time. I used to put him sleep in the toy room during the day or when we moved and didn't have the toy room i used to leave the cutains open in his room for day time sleeps and make the night time sleeps very dark so as to differentiate between night and day. At night we had to do the controlled crying thing. let him cry for a little while ((not too long so he gets to worked up and wont settle at all),they say not to let them cry for any more than 5-10 mins at each intervall.) then go in lie him back in bed without making any eye contact or speaking to him , then walk out. i used to stand at the door or just down the hall. each time you go back in leave it a little while longer. If he gets too worked up, you can tell when you've had enough and when he is past the point stop. take him out of the room and calm him down and don't put him back to bed until he is completly stettled down again. this technique is best used when only BOTH partners are in on it as it can get quite distressing. having the support of your partner makes this easier also they say that there is no point trying to do it on your own. you need to do it together. make sure that you are both in on it and that both of you know the rules to the technique. it may also take any where from a few nights to a week or so. the rewards are so great though. The idea is that he will eventually get the idea that you wont let him out just coz he crys but he also knows that you are only just around the corner if he really needs you. I hope this helps. I know that it worked for me and i also helped my friend do it with her first child and now she does it with all her little ones. She found that she couldn't do it on her own so i used to go over during the day and do it for her. it worked for us i hope it can help you!!! GOOD LUCK
duhnellie - Sunday, 14 Jun
I think any time now is ok to have a baby shower or do your baby's room. Planning to have a baby is exciting and I wish I had a bedroom to do for my new little one cause I would be fixing it up right now as well. I dont see anything wrong with what your are doing and what time you plan to do it. I think some people just criticize or think you are doing something weird or wrong when you are not doing it exactly the same as they did or are doing. Since she has had more babies she probably thinks she knows alittle more on how and when to do things when it really doesnt matter. Dont worry I dont see anything weird with what your doing at this time of your pregnancy. About your other dilima I hope somebody else has some good advice because I dont really know I cant remember how we did it with our son but we have been living with my husbands parents for almost a year and are moving in a couple weeks so he is going to have to get used to it again. I know he will cry but thats just where he needs to sleep. I hope everything is well and I hope you get the info you need.
AshRock - Sunday, 14 Jun
Hi,
I was having a lot of sleep problems with my 19 month old for a long time. I finally did some research and came up with a game plan and now my daughter goes to bed at 7:30 every night and wakes up between 6 and 7 every morning. Before this she wasn't going to sleep until 9 or 10 at night and I would have to hold her until she fell asleep. She would also wake up at least twice during the night and get up about 5 every morning. Here's what I did: I started putting her to bed 30 minutes earlier until we worked down to where we wanted to be. We gradually did this, it took about two weeks. I also needed to make her learn how to fall asleep on her own. The first two nights I put her to bed awake, but sleepy and she cried herself to sleep. She cried for about an hour both nights. It was hard, but well worth it in the end. After those two nights, she never cried again. So now she gets about 10 to 11 hours of sleep at night and usually takes about 2 hour nap from 9:30 to 11:30 every morning. Good luck and I hope some of this helps!
ShireeT - Sunday, 14 Jun
about your sis-in-law. ahe sounds like a poop. lol Sometimes ppl say stuff like that because they are trying to help protect you from getting hurt, especially where you have lost babies before, but it is important that you let her know these comments hurt. And you can have your baby shower as early as you freaking want to. :-)
About the toddler-bedtime situation, watch some episodes of Super Nanny where she explains to the parents how to deal with bedtime. You may need to tweak it slightly according to age, but all ages have the same basic strategies. Good Luck!
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