30-12-2010 - I need to vent

My mood while writing this blog: upset

I just needed to vent for a bit.

I was on a website about Provera looking for more information on it and side effects and I see all these posts by idiots wanting to know if they could use it for an abortion or forced miscarriage. I wanted to totally find these people and punch them.

Then I hear about my fiance's ex. She is about to give birth in January and she was out drinking and smoking and getting tattoos throughout the pregnancy. She did it with #1 (claims she didnt know she was pregnant until 7.5 months) and that baby came out well so why not this time. AUGH! Plus she says she wasnt sure for the first 5 months or so she was going to keep it so why not. OMG! I hate people like that.

I try not to judge people but when I hear things like this I feel sick. They are carrying such precious cargo and yet are doing crap like this. Then there are us out here who cant get pregnant easily who have to go through so much drama to get that BFP and then worry for the 9 months that the baby will be okay. We take prenatals before even trying, we dont drink while trying, we dont do anything that might harm the possible baby that we are trying to make. AUGH!

I know a girl from high school who found out she was pregnat and got a later term abbortion (late enough but still soon enough to be legal).. and you know what, it still is there with her. When she looks at her two boys and remembers they could have had an older sibling, when she hears of another person doing a similar thing. And sometimes I look at her and I hurt too. I love her because she is my friend and has been for 17 years, but it hurts to remember.

Anyway.. I had to vent. I try not to judge but it just hurts sometimes...