29-5-2008 - Week 23 still

My mood while writing this blog: content

I was just thinkin, the baby must love the sound of when I go potty because everytime she hears it her "room" getts bigger again :)

Well, I'm still feelin good. My tummy is more tender to things putting pressure on it. I cant carry stuff up against it anymore. I definately dont like the dog pouncing on it, ugh! When I bend over far it is uncomfortable but all of these things are fine and expected, I feel good. I'm up 23 lbs today. 23 lbs in 23 weeks yikes. Somewhere its gotta stop. I dont want to gain 40 lbs. *sigh*

My dr said shes givin me the Rh shot. Well my hubby is a O- so I dont know why I would need the shot. She didnt even ask his blood type. We'll be talking about that at my next appt.

I'm thinkin (a little) about birth. Its scary so I dont think about it much but it is time to start. I'm really conflicted about it all. I would like to do a natural birth, possibly in water or squatting but I dont know if I could handle the pain. And what if it took a long time? Sounds like a possible torture session. On the other hand, I totally don't like the idea of the side effects of drugs! Hmmm. Here I go again, in circles. My temptation is to stay away form the hospital for as long as possible, show up when I'm ready to pop and do it squatting. That sounds like the fastest way w/o a buch of IV's and ppl probing me every so often and possible drugs and monitors and opinions and pressure to "speed things up" (pitocin). Hmmmm. See what I mean, I just dont know. My mom did it like that except for the squatting part. She showed up and popp'd me and my sis out on two different occasions w/o giving them even time to prep the room, I love that! On the other hand, the epidural sounds great, its just that it slows down labor and then they want to speed it up with pitocin and that can stress the baby and possible lead to a c-section, yada yada yada. I dont know.

So I dreamed last night that I had the baby and she hadnt eatin yet and time just kept passin and she was just fine for days and finally I thought " uh oh, I better get her to eat, what if I dry up" so I kept trying and things kept getting in the way like Id have to go pee and then this would happen and that would happen and finally I got to it after many obstacles and I think I was dried up because she tried to suck for a few seconds but then lost interest like she realized there was nothing there. I was really bummed out. Ive had a dream like that before where I go to nurse her like a week after shes born cause I just hadnt thought about it and she was fine, not hungry or anything (as if) and in the last dream she did latch on successfully so that was good but not in this dream.

My nursery was coming along and now I'm thinkin, hmm, do I really want to do everything I wanted to do? Maybe I'll keep it simple'r. I dont know. Decisions, decisions. Well, I really need to get to work so, ttyl.