11-9-2009 - 18 months

My mood while writing this blog: Stressed but content

Well, I haven't been on here in a long time so I thought I would blog a bit. Cohen and I are quit happy. We recently moved into a much more spacious home with a backyard to play in and our own rooms. I am still training at 911 which is incredibly stressful. I definitly like my job but there are days when I just want to walk away. I have been in training for 10 months and I think that can wear on anyone. Just want to on my own already but it will happen eventually. Cohen is a bit of a challenge these days. Not exactly the sweet, mellow baby he once was. He likes to climb on any and everything, likes to get dirty, likes to get into things he shouldn't, likes to get other things dirty. When I restrict him from these activities he gets pretty angry and will scream and even hit me sometimes. I guess it's just a stage but after a long stressful day at work, the last thing I need is a temper tantrum. Lol, sometimes I feel like throwing one. Being a single parent is challenging on its own but my circumstances are a little different. With the job I am training in as well as chronic pain issues I have, sometimes it's hard to stay positive. I just try to look at the big picture. This is the job I wanted, the home I wanted, and my son is healthy and happy. His father has still expressed no interest in meeting Cohen which is fine with me. I wish Cohen had a man to look up to but that just isn't in the cards right now. I guess Cohen's dad had another baby boy in May (finally got his JR). He is very much involved with that child from what I hear. I'm not sure I even believe it's his though. Robert is half black but very light skinned. He has blond hair and blue eyes and just looks tan. I saw a picture of this baby and it is very dark. At least half black. I know it's possible since the genes are there but it's like a one and a million chance. The mother is blond hair blue eyed as well so it's not coming from that end. Of course all that doesn't matter. My son deserves to have a father that wants him and will be there for him. When it comes down to it, we have everything we need. Soon I will be out of training and Cohen will be out of this stage (into another I'm sure). He is still the most wonderful thing that has ever come into my life. Without him for motivation, I would never had made it as far as I have. Hope all you ladies are doing well...

Molly