24-3-2009 - braxtons update

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

first off i want to thank everyone for your thoughts & prayers..they mean everything right now because God is in total control.. i love all of you =)

the doctors have informed me that braxton was born with jagged irises. which means he is having a VERY difficult time seeing & making out images. the doctors have also informed me he will most likely develop glaucoma in the next few weeks..which is most likely to cause blindness. i am praying SO hard that this does not happen to my little man. i am praying that they are wrong & that he is just a little bit behind with his vision, but i fear the worst is true. i know this is all in God's hands..it is totally out of mine. all i can do is be the best mother in the world & stay strong for myself & my little one. i HATE being at work..i want to be with my baby. i need to be with my baby! but i JUST got back from maternity leave on march 9 & as most of you know i have been out since dec.17 because i dilated early..ive been there EVERY night..EVERY lunch break..but i feel like that is just not enough. i am honestly doing all that i can though. i ALWAYS make sure someone is with him, he has not been left without someone in my family for even a split second! The doctors told me that Braxton has some staff in his bloodstream. Which is VERY SCARY & VERY DANGEROUS especially at his age..he will only be 3 months on april 9th. they are keeping him at vanderbilt intensive care again tonight & probably until the end of this week. They told me they will know even more on the staff tomorrow & can give me a better explanation. (which is also what they told me yesterday, but we will see..) but just so everyone knows braxton looks great! he seems like he feels a lot better..hes smiling & cooing again! he still has a fever though & he is uncomfortable..you can tell. its just so heartbreaking. i will keep you all updated =) thank you again!

i managed to snap this picture last night when i got off work..i wish you could see his little yellow gown hes wearing it is sooo cute! he looks so happy & healthy..its so sad that all this is going on.