28-4-2009 - Cya in San Diego =(

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

i guess this blog is just for some needed prayers. if you have followed my story you know my mother has been through a LOT this year..& now she has decided to move to San Diego. She will be leaving on May 7, 2009, which is only 2 weeks away. How in the WORLD will i ever make it without my mommy? I have NO idea. She picks braxton up everyday from his great grandmas @ 3 so I can stop by & get him on the way home ( i live right down the street from her apt ). I've never been without my mom..she is my BEST friend..she's such a HUGE help..when im really stressed out she will come over & rock Braxton to sleep..i don't know how in the world i am going to do it without her. I see her EVERY DAY! & now i will NEVER see her. i booked a flight already to go out there for July 4 weekend, but i know its going to be so hard to wait that long. ah, im tearing up so much thinking about it. i want to go so bad, but i cant. She is going because my little brother will be starting his Senior yr in highschool & he has worked his butt off to get into a school out there so my dad doesn't want to pay out of state tuition! My little brother will be leaving in June. He will live @ my dads in the mean time. i need a lot of prayer girls. i feel like ill just be so lost without my mom. she is honestly ALL i have here. & i know i can still talk to her, but its not the same. i am a BIG time mommy's girl. & i am just scared what the future will hold. i really help take care or my mom & my brother just doesn't treat her the way i do. im so worried with her cancer & everything..i just pray for everything to work out & i pray i can join her soon because i really don't want to live away from her!