| mrsscorpio | |
 | Age: 29 Country: USA Province/region: City: Partner: Children: Yes, 1 Pregnant: Not anymore Occupation: |
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I am not with my child's father and we will likely never be together as a couple again. He cannot maintain employment and his skills as a father are questionable. I'm sure he will visit the child and will play some part in the child's life but I do not want to give the child his last name.
He is upset about it because he feels the child should obviously have his last name. However, I think it would be easier for me as a single parent if the child has my last name. If my child has my last name, it will not be obvious to doctors, teachers and other outsiders that my child has been born out of wedlock. (The only problem is I hate my last name).
Who says the child must have the dad's last name anyway?
Do you think it's okay for a mother to give her child born out of wedlock her last name instead of dad's?
5 Comments on Daddy's last name or NO?
kimberly amber - Saturday, 6 Jun
i think u should give it your last name!!
BrieM - Monday, 1 Jun
I don't know what to say about whose name the child should have. That is a decision that is going to take a lot of thought. But you really should try not to take into consideration what other people will think. Just think of what's best for your baby. It's not like he/she will be the only child, that is very common these days. He/she will grow up just the same as anyone else regardless of the last name he/she was given.
fortysomething - Sunday, 31 May
I believe all children should have their father's last name even if he is an assshole. The only time I make an exception to this rule is in incidents of rape where the person does not know who the father is. Children need to know who their family is even if they are estranged from their fathers. It helps in cases where they run into a brother or sister later and decrease the chances of them hooking up. That is just my personal opinion. Also, I don't think you should care so much about what other thinks about you being unwed. The only person you will be lying to is yourself. The fact of the matter is the child will be born out of wedlock but that does not make a child that is any better than your child. People are going to talk no matter what. It is none of their business. I would just refer to him as my ex, and if anyone tries to pry further as to whether you are or were married or not, I would just tell them that is none of their business. I have a friend who did the same thing wore a ring and all and had to constantly lie. She told me every time she had to do that it ate her up a little more inside. Your not the first and won't be the last unwed mother in the world, especially in today's society, but if it makes you feel better to do that go ahead. But you shouldn't be ashamed. I'm sure you are a strong black woman and will raise a strong black child. Teach him/her to be proud of themselves, and that includes every aspect. Please don't be ashamed of your blessing in any way.
3blessings - Sunday, 31 May
Give the child your last name!
mckrush - Sunday, 31 May
i would give it my last name
| 30-5-2009 - Daddy's last name or NO? |  My mood while writing this blog:Ok |
I am not with my child's father and we will likely never be together as a couple again. He cannot maintain employment and his skills as a father are questionable. I'm sure he will visit the child and will play some part in the child's life but I do not want to give the child his last name.
He is upset about it because he feels the child should obviously have his last name. However, I think it would be easier for me as a single parent if the child has my last name. If my child has my last name, it will not be obvious to doctors, teachers and other outsiders that my child has been born out of wedlock. (The only problem is I hate my last name).
Who says the child must have the dad's last name anyway?
Do you think it's okay for a mother to give her child born out of wedlock her last name instead of dad's?
5 Comments on Daddy's last name or NO?
kimberly amber - Saturday, 6 Jun
i think u should give it your last name!!
BrieM - Monday, 1 Jun
I don't know what to say about whose name the child should have. That is a decision that is going to take a lot of thought. But you really should try not to take into consideration what other people will think. Just think of what's best for your baby. It's not like he/she will be the only child, that is very common these days. He/she will grow up just the same as anyone else regardless of the last name he/she was given.
fortysomething - Sunday, 31 May
I believe all children should have their father's last name even if he is an assshole. The only time I make an exception to this rule is in incidents of rape where the person does not know who the father is. Children need to know who their family is even if they are estranged from their fathers. It helps in cases where they run into a brother or sister later and decrease the chances of them hooking up. That is just my personal opinion. Also, I don't think you should care so much about what other thinks about you being unwed. The only person you will be lying to is yourself. The fact of the matter is the child will be born out of wedlock but that does not make a child that is any better than your child. People are going to talk no matter what. It is none of their business. I would just refer to him as my ex, and if anyone tries to pry further as to whether you are or were married or not, I would just tell them that is none of their business. I have a friend who did the same thing wore a ring and all and had to constantly lie. She told me every time she had to do that it ate her up a little more inside. Your not the first and won't be the last unwed mother in the world, especially in today's society, but if it makes you feel better to do that go ahead. But you shouldn't be ashamed. I'm sure you are a strong black woman and will raise a strong black child. Teach him/her to be proud of themselves, and that includes every aspect. Please don't be ashamed of your blessing in any way.
3blessings - Sunday, 31 May
Give the child your last name!
mckrush - Sunday, 31 May
i would give it my last name
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11-7-2009 - She kicked ME !!!!
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30-5-2009 - Daddy's last name or NO?
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29-5-2009 - Pregnant and SINGLE
06-10-2009 - Pregnancy Discrimination
15-9-2009 - GESTATIONAL DIABETES
25-8-2009 - Where's my MILK?
30-7-2009 - Cant Hardly Wait !!!!!!
13-7-2009 - Laid OFF and Stressed OUT
11-7-2009 - She kicked ME !!!!
02-7-2009 - It's a GIRL !!!!
15-6-2009 - Round and Uncomfortable
14-6-2009 - Second Trimester Screening
09-6-2009 - Hand Me Downs
30-5-2009 - Daddy's last name or NO?
29-5-2009 - My insurance SUCKS !!!
29-5-2009 - Pregnant and SINGLE
Polls
- Do you plan to wash your baby`s new clothing and blankets before you use them?...
Date: 19-10-2009 Votes: 69 Comments: 3 - Still searching for a name, What do you think about Amaya for a girl?...
Date: 2-8-2009 Votes: 45 Comments: 3 - When should I have baby shower? ...
Date: 11-7-2009 Votes: 57 Comments: 5 - My family wants me to name the baby London but I`m not sold...Do you like the na...
Date: 7-7-2009 Votes: 75 Comments: 4 - Do you like the name Samara? pronounced (sa mar ah) or (sa mare a)...
Date: 6-7-2009 Votes: 48 Comments: 7
Agenda
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